Well, in a pure mathematics context, the metric has a pretty abstract definition in terms of something called the “first fundamental form” - which essentially boils down to defining the notion of an “inner product” on your manifold. Physically, this means that a metric enables you to quantify lengths, areas, volumes, angles etc - so it makes it possible to relate physical laws to real-world measurement outcomes. More specifically in GR, it is used to quantify the separation between events in spacetime. Given a connection, this determines all the various curvature tensors etc.
I must reiterate that it is not my intention to deny that some coordinate system needs to be chosen in order to actually perform the calculation - however, the point is that the physics aren’t in the coordinate system itself, they are in structure of the metric, i.e. in how the components of the metric tensor (in a given coordinate basis) are related to one another. This is an invariant property, unlike the value of the components themselves. I meant it in this sense.
Indeed, that’s pretty much what I am attempting to point out, with the addition that in the context of GR, the metric is the more fundamental object.
Indeed.