I think it is best to just keep the situation fully classic, and consider only physical clocks to begin with, rather than wave functions. The question of evolution operators in RQM is complex and very non-trivial, and does little to illuminate this underlying question.
Time dilation is a relationship between reference frames, and not something that physically “happens” to a single clock. Asking for a mechanism that “slows down” some clock is thus meaningless - clocks always tick at the same rate within their own frames. So the correct question would be why inertial frames are related via hyperbolic rotations in spacetime - that’s a very valid question, but it isn’t one that any of our present theories can answer. So to make a long story short, we don’t have an explanation of why this happens, only a description of it. That’s not the same thing at all.
The length of a world line between given events in Minkowski spacetime is defined to be equivalent to the proper time of a clock travelling between these events that traces out that world line. In other words, it’s simply the total elapsed time that’s physically measured on a clock that travels along a specific spatial path between events.
Intuitiveness is not a necessary condition for a mathematical model to be valid and useful. It just needs to be internally self-consistent, and produce results that can be verified using the scientific method. I think you would agree that SR does this quite well.
Beside, something being intuitive (or not) is a very subjective measure - many things I find intuitive might appear otherwise to you, and vice versa.
I would, by and large, agree with you - though I wouldn’t put into such strong terms. I just think many depictions of physical concepts get the differences between what is an explanation and what is a description muddled up, especially within pop-sci publications. We do not yet know the underlying mechanism of why spacetime is what it is, but we do have an excellent description of its features. To fully understand why spacetime gives rise to the phenomenology we see, we’d have to figure out first how spacetime itself comes to be, and if it can be broken down further into more fundamental concepts. Such attempts are under way, but at present they are just ideas and conjectures.
I disagree. Physics makes models of the world around us, but not all of these models purport to be a fundamental explanation in ontological terms. As such, SR is a very good model that is in excellent agreement with experiment and observation. It’s just important to not confuse a model with an (ontological) explanation, because they are not the same.