Penelope

Thanks to everyone for their replies, I have thought about this and feel I have made some progress on this issue. I also read about burnout and depression as someone suggested and listened to some inspiring talks by Srikumar Rao on the issue of happiness at work. Although I think I have found out little ways that can make my work feel more meaningful and enjoyable, unfortunately I still am not sure what I should do. (Maybe this is the wrong way of thinking about this, maybe there is nothing I 'should' do). It seems that most people that work in science either have personal ambitions of scientific success, and/or are driven by a sort of idealism about scientific thought and progress, as if science was an ideology that needed supporters, advocates and so on. I do not feel comfortable with these roles (I do not, as people say often, ´love´ science) and as far as personal ambitions go, they would probably be better served in other areas. On the other hand, I do not feel it would be responsible for me to refuse a job option when I need the economic support and do not have any other solid options. I guess I will just inform myself of my options, and wait and see if at some point I see some opportunity.

Hi, I'm a 4th year phd student and I've found that I have increasingly lost interest in working in science. Things are going relatively well for me, I have a great relationship with my advisor who is happy with me, I have published a couple of papers (just recently even got some coverage in the news) and I have been offered a postdoc position. My personal and family life is also satisfactory, no complaints there. My problem is that I have lost interest in doing scientific research, and so am not sure whether I should continue after my phD. I have seen other people talking about lack of motivation online, but usually they complain about frustration with their project or too much benchwork, and I don't think that is my case. I used to believe that publishing papers is a good way to contribute to the increase of knowledge in society, and now for various reasons, I am very skeptical of this. I am also sort of demotivated by the prevalent focus on competitively publishing papers, together with what I see as a relative lack of focus on learning, and seeking knowledge and truth. This has been like this for atleast a couple of years, and is becoming clearer to me as I became less overwhelmed with the novelty of starting a phd. I have considered continuing in research anyway, but somehow this feels sort of dishonest to me. Also my lack of motivation makes me spend more time reading about other topics than on reading and thinking about my science work. On the other hand, maybe this is a sort of emotional phase, or just some kind of general desmotivation that I would re-experience if a work in another sector? I have told my advisor some time ago that I am not sure what I want to do after my phd, and he was very responsive and asked me if there was anything that I could change so to regain my motivation, maybe do more experimental work, or more reading, give classes, go to conferences, etc, or if I needed more time with my family, or more autonomy or personal space, etc. But I do not see any of these things as my problem. Has this happened to anybody else out there? I am not sure what I should do, so any comments or suggestions would be nice. Thanks