At this school a group of disgruntled terrorists hold a bunch of people captive in the gymnasium and gives a mother a choice of taking one of her children but leaving the other with the terrorists.
Q: Which child stayed with the terrorists?
A: The ugly one.
On an airplane that's about to crash a lady gets up, takes her clothes off, and says "If I'm going to die I want to die feeling like a woman! Is anyone on this plane man enough to make me feel like one?"
A man gets up, takes his shirt off, throws it at the lady, and says "Here! Iron this!"
Docter Dave slept with one of his patients once and he felt guilty even though he was single. The guilt nearly drove him mad because he began hearing voices in his head. One voice said "It's all right Dave! Let it go; you're single!" Another voice brought him back to reality by saying "Dave! You sick bastard! You're a vet for God's sake!"