hayleycomet

Hi there, You poor things, it sounds like life at home is really stressful right now! You said in your post that the child has had a lot of people come and go in her life, and also you say that she is afraid her mother will love her less when the baby is born. I agree with the other posts, a family counselor is not a bad idea. But, as you say, putting the child into a hospital/home should be a last resort. Try this first… Let’s just suppose that the little girl feels that she has no control over her life. Things happen, and she has no control over them. To answer this, I suggest your fiancée makes her a special helper with the pregnancy. 1. The little girl and her mom (and not you!) go shopping for the new baby 2. Your fiancée consults with the little girl about names for the baby 3. Mum gives the little girl the job of rubbing oil on her belly every night, or every second night, when you are not there (so they can talk and so on) 4. Bring the little girl to hospital appointments because she is such a big girl (and not the other children) 5. You both try to include the little girl in decisions abut the baby and what will happen when he/she is born The aim of all this to give little girl some say in what is going on in her life, that is, give her power back, and help her realise how important she is.You haven’t been there that long. She has been there longer. You seem like a caring man, best of luck!

Hey there, The reason the child hits herself and not somebody else when she is frustrated is because at her age, she has already internalised the message that you cannot hit out when you are frustrated. thus she hits in. To solve the problem, look at the function of the behaviour - in this case it seems to be relief from frustration. teach the child new skills for dealing with her frustration to replace the behaviour, for example, kicking a beanbag in her bedroom, making a list of things that are annoying her and giving it to her parents, phoning a friend to share how she's feeling etc. What you are aiming to do is teach the child new skills for dealing with those feelings in a more appropriate way. Good luck

I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder in my teens. I mostly ignored that diagnosis because I didn’t want to know about it. BPD is a pretty brutal diagnosis and the prognosis used to be very negative. I decided to get on with my life and I aimed to be as together and balanced as I could possibly be. For the most part I succeeded. I have been in the same job for four years (one with adults with intellectual disabilities and behaviours that challenge), I do community work (with Irish Travellers) and I maintain stable and close relationships. Even though I am a competent and normal person, I have had to lie in order to be employable. I am finally getting over this diagnosis and also my undiagnosed Attention Deficit Disorder, Depression & Anxiety and possibly - Alcoholism! I guess my point is this: BPD has been criticized for being a ‘catch-all’ diagnosis: young women who had been traumatised in childhood and were now difficult, hysterical and self-destructive. The prognosis was poor until they did research that suggested otherwise. I want to open a thread about the impact of scientific zeitgeist in abnormal psychology. It’s well-documented that negative expectations can produce negative outcomes. Has anyone read ‘Listening to Prozac’? - Where the author speaks about how Prozac is used to ‘medicate personality’. Do any other posters have experience or knowledge about how diagnosis can actually be a risk factor for more negative outcomes? Or any views about the power of psychiatry? Or am I completely mad

Maybe it's because when you are thinking about a particular problem, and exploring different details of said problem, something gets cued in long-term memory. When this 'missing piece' rises to your working memory, you have a 'eureka moment. also interesting about fMri...great research being done, but as an experimental method, one of it's biggest limitations is trying to simulate exactly these kinds of spontaneous phenomena. i guess I'm agreeing with Rilx there...

I suppose one thing about expressing your sexuality as a pretend-animal might be the freedom from social constraints. Literally a license to express your 'animal side'. I sound like a furry don't I? But I swear I'm not...

My sister once ate a lot of sweets at a party and went a bit mental. She was seven. Hope that helps.

I see your predicament. I’ve had a few mental health problems myself, namely depression and anxiety (I recognise these are in in a different class), My G.P. tried putting me on Xyprexa for a while, just because my mood was so up and down. With hindsight it was using a sledgehammer to crack a nut, but it really gave me some insight into the pharmacological yoke that some people have to bear. At around 2pm every day I became overwhelmed with exhaustion, and couldn’t do anything but sleep. Then when I woke I was groggy and upset that the day was half-gone etc. You say ‘its very difficult for me to cope with the reality that i will live forever with odd sleeping hours and never experience life as normal people know it’. I don’t want to sound harsh but you and I are lucky to live in an age when there are medications which can relieve our symptoms. The downside is that these ‘wonder-drugs’ operate at a price. Psychiatrists are medical doctors, who regard your illness as a wholly organic and biological phenomenon, and there is damn good support for their position. However, I have one suggestion, maybe you’ve considered it already… Referring to your statement above, I recommend you attend a counsellor in the existential tradition. Maybe you can come to terms with your difference a bit better. Don’t be hung up on the idea that everyone else is normal and you’re not. I’m not trying to be depressing, but maybe in your lifetime there will not be a medical solution for your problem. This is not something you can control. However you may be able to get a handle on how you deal with it. I believe a good counsellor can work with you to get beyond this.