my brain.

[quickquestion]

3 days ago I was watching the Librarian. In there there was a math genius, her name was Cassandra, and she sounds like Pinkie Pie. The secret of why she is good at math is because she has a Tumor in her brain. In one episode there are 3 Ladies of the Lake. I thought they were Sirens, but I guess they are not sirens. That night, I went to bed and I was suddenly feeling good at math. I went to bed and I started doing equations in my head. I self-taught myself some equations and discovered the answer to the equations. I realized that if you plot the functions the cross of the lines will tell you the result of the variable. For example, if you have an equation c=(c-1)/3 to find out c you plot the functions. I figured this out on my own. But I am wondering, is there a different way to do this that doesn't require you to plot the functions (because by hand, or by mind, you may lose some accuracy in certain equations with graph paper alone.)

 

What I found is when I imagine I am in the city of Atlantis, and I am an Underwater Goddess, I can do math and it all feels clear to me. But when I am stressed out and feel like it is a competition, I feel like I have ADHD and can't focus and do the math. When I go to wikipedia, it feels like it is bombarding me with black and white text. And I have this feeling where I just want to get away. But when I am thinking about math on my own, sometimes I discover the same truths that were on wikipedia, but I didn't comprehend them while I was reading wikipedia, I had to discover them on my own, because when I read wikipedia it feels like a robot is bombarding me with an army of monocolor text, and it stresses me out. I like to relax and feel at peace. For me, mathematics is a pleasant calm peaceful moving and rearrangement of symbols. It is a puzzle to be done at a leisure and calm serenity. For me, logic is a Combative-war like entity. That is why I excel at logic on online forums, because online forums most people are pent-up, combative and always argue.

 

I say these messages for future generations. Because I believe math should be an atheistic religion, where we strive to be goddesses in the City of Atlantis, eating organic, hippie green foods. And that Logic should philosophically be associated with competitiveness and combativeness. And that the more battle hardened someone is, the more logical they are (Thus the meme of Star Trek...why Vulcans are the most logical species, and also the most war-hardened. And why Kirk's logic is on par with Spock...because he has seen so many battles.) And I believe that if children were taught this thing at school, it would save them from delusion. For example, John Carmack is a man of logic but made the DOOM videogames. I believe that Children need a peaceful, aquatic-type environment at school and not the Competitive, George W. Bush black-and-white type of WOT environment at school. And for children to see that math is not really a cruel Zeus, but a loving Goddess.

 

So 2 days ago I watched the last 3 episodes of Librarians. There was a lot of Time-paradox. I understood all of it...and I think it would have been better to just not understand it, because it was very convoluted and gave me twists in my stomach. And that night I ate some middle-eastern food. There was garlic sauce and deep fried items. I woke up at 4:00 in the morning. I had planned on playing videogames at 8:00 but my videogame buddy changed their mind. So I went back to bed for four hours. I woke up at noon with backpains and a small headache. I felt sick and quesy. I needed the videogames to give me an adrenaline shot. The other day I went to the doctors and they made me have XRAYS in my belly and did some weird stretches on my body. The next day I was run down sick and sleeping all day. As the day went on I had a throbbing pain in my brain...like my brain felt like the color red. And when my heart beated I could feel it pulse through my neck and then through my brain. And then I had this feeling of the middle eastern food I ate the other day still in my throat. I am wondering what caused my brain pain. Was it the fact I slept in a reclining chair? Was it the fried middle eastern food and fatty garlic dip. Was it the time-paradox in the last episode of the Librarians. Was it the XRAYS. Was it the weird stretching. Was it not playing videogames in-time and thus not getting a needed adrenaline boost in time. Was it all of these things, some of things, or neither. That is what I want to know. Also, one important clue is that my belly was hotter than normal that day. Another clue was it was the lateral left-longitudal-middle portion of my brain, and it felt like an oval-gradient region. Also, today I forgot the combo on one of my locks. But yesterday I figured out an important theorem of car physics.

 

Also, I want to say something philosophical. We, are nothing. I am nothing. I am just an entity inside of a brain witnessing time go by. I am powerless to stop time. Time just pushes matter around me. I am powerless to make time stop. In fact time should not stop. Time is not a thief, it is a giver. Moments must go by, anything else would be very dreadful. They are valued, because of their impermanence, much like a diamond is a rarity. Feeling sick and dying is one of the best feelings in the world. You feel at peace. Like you dont owe the world anyhting, and you dont have to be a hero. that you can just die and be free of this world. And when you are sick it is such a good feeling, because you dont think about your worldly woes and failures. you dont think about all the people who let you down and wronged you. in fact being sick probably saved me from misery. And the ultimate thought-game...we could all be One-being, the same person, dying and then entering each other's bodies. But we'd never know it. and we just waste our time fighting and not helping each other. When we could be spending time trying to make each other happy. And that is the grand tragedy of the universe...we send ourselves to perditions that we built for each other.

Edited April 29, 2017 by quickquestion