What is inner-peace?

[dimreepr]

A couple of recent threads, I've commented in, suggests the answer to this question is not obvious, so

Let's discuss... 

[DrP]

I would guess it would mean different things to different people...  There is also inner joy,   which I think is a different thing.

I was going to ask if your definition was contentment...  but you can be content without inner peace I suppose. I would guess that it would have something to do with being content. I would not want to be so practiced at being content with my situation and having inner peace that I lost all feeling. Grief, for example, needs to be experienced and worked though and I cannot think how you could keep a level inner peace whilst freshly grieving. I suspect your definition might stem from your experience with Buddhism?

Have you ever experienced multi emotions at once...  both joy and sorrow simultaneously?  It is a powerful mixture of emotions when you have extreme grief but you keep your joy at full tilt too. 

 

[zapatos]

I tend to think of it as the ability to remain psychologically calm in the presence of stress. I also think it is not an 'all or nothing' thing, but a skill that you can have various levels of 'expertise' in.

[dimreepr]

 

17 minutes ago, DrP said:

I would guess it would mean different things to different people... 

 

Well yes, I imagine it must be but then all roads lead to Rome.

19 minutes ago, DrP said:

I was going to ask if your definition was contentment...  but you can be content without inner peace I suppose. I would guess that it would have something to do with being content.

First things first, if you can't be content with your brother how can you be at peace with him.

27 minutes ago, DrP said:

I would not want to be so practiced at being content with my situation and having inner peace that I lost all feeling. Grief, for example, needs to be experienced and worked though and I cannot think how you could keep a level inner peace whilst freshly grieving.

This is at the heart of my question, why would you think it's about blocking a feeling? 

32 minutes ago, DrP said:

I suspect your definition might stem from your experience with Buddhism?

I know very little about Buddhism other than 'Kung Fu Panda', not that I don't find similarities with my own thoughts.

35 minutes ago, DrP said:

Have you ever experienced multi emotions at once...  both joy and sorrow simultaneously?  It is a powerful mixture of emotions when you have extreme grief but you keep your joy at full tilt too. 

Yes indeed, not grief but anger at a significant other who changed that just by making me smile with relief. 

12 minutes ago, zapatos said:

I tend to think of it as the ability to remain psychologically calm in the presence of stress. I also think it is not an 'all or nothing' thing, but a skill that you can have various levels of 'expertise' in.

To my mind, it is an all or nothing thing, you either understand or you don't. 

21 minutes ago, zapatos said:

I tend to think of it as the ability to remain psychologically calm in the presence of stress. I also think it is not an 'all or nothing' thing, but a skill that you can have various levels of 'expertise' in.

I disagree, you either understand why it's significant or you don't; if you do then peace is a given, if you don't then it matters not how often you bang your head in its pursuit, you won't find peace just a headache. 

[zapatos]

32 minutes ago, dimreepr said:

To my mind, it is an all or nothing thing, you either understand or you don't. 

I disagree, you either understand why it's significant or you don't;

Understand what?

[DrP]

38 minutes ago, dimreepr said:

 

To my mind, it is an all or nothing thing, you either understand or you don't. 

Depends on your definition of it.

 

[koti]

1 hour ago, dimreepr said:

What is inner-peace?

This question coming from you comes as an enormous surprise to me. I've been schooled by you in the past months several times on this subject so naturally, I concluded that you must be an expert "inner-peace'r"
As to my opinion on the question is that the state of inner peace is highly subjective and there could not (or even should not) be a singled out definition.
Peace.

[Lord Antares]

Inner peace is when you claim you have inner peace but repeatedly argue with other members on a forum.

[jimmydasaint]

When I hold my baby grand daughter in my arms, I feel a calming of the ocean of my thoughts which reflects and affects the calmness of my body.  I guess inner peace is a lack of thousands of thoughts racing through the mind.  Something the Dalai Lama probably experiences...

[Outrider]

6 hours ago, zapatos said:

I tend to think of it as the ability to remain psychologically calm in the presence of stress.

Thats a good start I would add the ability to not hold a grudge and not seek revenge even when it is due us. The ability to have empathy for strangers without getting depressed. The ability to be happy at what I have and also be happy for what you have even if it more than what I have. 

6 hours ago, zapatos said:

I also think it is not an 'all or nothing' thing, but a skill that you can have various levels of 'expertise' in.

Yes! I like to think on my good days I'm fairly skilled but on my bad days not so much. Also it's not always desired if I am attacked I'll find something better than inner peace to them over the head with. 

7 hours ago, DrP said:

I was going to ask if your definition was contentment...  but you can be content without inner peace I suppose. I would guess that it would have something to do with being content.

I would say they are related. Think of it this way any ballplayer can be content with winning but a ballplayer with inner peace can be content with losing. Which brings us back to it's not always desired.

7 hours ago, DrP said:

I would not want to be so practiced at being content with my situation and having inner peace that I lost all feeling. Grief, for example, needs to be experienced and worked though and I cannot think how you could keep a level inner peace whilst freshly grieving.

This is not a made up situation for me and probably not for you either. You are right that at the moment you learn there is absolutely no peace of any kind. But hopefully at some point you can accept that your time together was a gift. On my good days, the days I feel like I have inner peace, I can accept and enjoy recalling our time together. On my bad days I rage against the dying of the light.

[Prometheus]

7 hours ago, DrP said:

I would not want to be so practiced at being content with my situation and having inner peace that I lost all feeling.

This seems to suggest you see inner peace as being the same as having no feeling?  Not sure if that is a reflection on Buddhism, but it is a common misinterpretation of the practice.

For instance it's quite common amongst people new to meditation to think that they must clear their minds of all thoughts. But the brain is an organ that thinks - to try to stop is as foolhardy as trying to to start your heart from beating.

My take on inner peace is that you lose your sense of self and separateness from the world. You don't feel like a dancer dancing, there is only dance. You don't feel like a footballer playing football, there is just the ebb and flow of the match. You don't feel like a monk sitting there clearing your mind of all thought, there is just wholehearted sitting. You don't feel like a husband having an argument with his wife, there is just the full blooded heat of the moment.

None of your emotions or perceptions change, it's just that you relate to them in a different way.

[Outrider]

13 hours ago, DrP said:

Have you ever experienced multi emotions at once...  both joy and sorrow simultaneously?  It is a powerful mixture of emotions when you have extreme grief but you keep your joy at full tilt too. 

The first thing I thought of was being really angry and deeply in love at the same time. My wife can do that to...well to this man anyway.

 

12 hours ago, dimreepr said:

Yes indeed, not grief but anger at a significant other who changed that just by making me smile with relief. 

The fact that you changed means it wasn't simultaneous. When you lose someone you care so deeply about that you would gladly change places with them at first it's all tears and all sorrow. But later and it may be days or it may be years later or for some unfortunate persons it may be never you will have days where you laugh and cry at the same time. A memory may pop in your of a good time you had but then the memory that they are gone hits you and the joy is still going strong even as the sorrow wraps around you. And it can happen the other way around as well and while most of the time one emotion wins out eventually there are times when you are just locked in joy/sorrow. I like to think thats inner peace. 

[Dubbelosix]

14 hours ago, dimreepr said:

A couple of recent threads, I've commented in, suggests the answer to this question is not obvious, so

Let's discuss... 

To me inner peace is defined by many things I think.. how do you define it, we all mature at different rates?

Edited October 27, 2017 by Dubbelosix

[koti]

12 hours ago, jimmydasaint said:

When I hold my baby grand daughter in my arms, I feel a calming of the ocean of my thoughts which reflects and affects the calmness of my body.  I guess inner peace is a lack of thousands of thoughts racing through the mind.  Something the Dalai Lama probably experiences...

When I hold my 18 month old in my arms I feel the same but I presume that both the mental and physical reactions of my body in that state are love not inner peace. I guess.

[StringJunky]

Feeling and thinking calmly even in the face of adversity.

[dimreepr]

21 hours ago, zapatos said:

Understand what?

A surprisingly difficult question to answer (I'm going to mull it over for while).

I agree that people have varying levels of peace but inner-peace is an absolute that transcends the spectrum.

14 hours ago, Prometheus said:

This seems to suggest you see inner peace as being the same as having no feeling?  Not sure if that is a reflection on Buddhism, but it is a common misinterpretation of the practice.

For instance it's quite common amongst people new to meditation to think that they must clear their minds of all thoughts. But the brain is an organ that thinks - to try to stop is as foolhardy as trying to to start your heart from beating.

My take on inner peace is that you lose your sense of self and separateness from the world. You don't feel like a dancer dancing, there is only dance. You don't feel like a footballer playing football, there is just the ebb and flow of the match. You don't feel like a monk sitting there clearing your mind of all thought, there is just wholehearted sitting. You don't feel like a husband having an argument with his wife, there is just the full blooded heat of the moment.

None of your emotions or perceptions change, it's just that you relate to them in a different way.

Exactly +1 I wish I had your eloquence but my lack of language skills won't stop me trying.

19 hours ago, Lord Antares said:

Inner peace is when you claim you have inner peace but repeatedly argue with other members on a forum.

One is allowed to enjoy oneself don't make the mistake of assuming it means you can't be angry or sad or... 

9 hours ago, Outrider said:

When you lose someone you care so deeply about that you would gladly change places with them at first it's all tears and all sorrow. But later and it may be days or it may be years later or for some unfortunate persons it may be never you will have days where you laugh and cry at the same time. A memory may pop in your of a good time you had but then the memory that they are gone hits you and the joy is still going strong even as the sorrow wraps around you. And it can happen the other way around as well and while most of the time one emotion wins out eventually there are times when you are just locked in joy/sorrow.

9 hours ago, Outrider said:

I like to think thats inner peace. 

No, but it is a by-product.

 

Indeed celebrate their life and remember them; feel sad and be happy they were in your life.  

21 hours ago, koti said:

This question coming from you comes as an enormous surprise to me. I've been schooled by you in the past months several times on this subject so naturally, I concluded that you must be an expert "inner-peace'r"
As to my opinion on the question is that the state of inner peace is highly subjective and there could not (or even should not) be a singled out definition.
Peace.

A definition is like trying to catch smoke; it's like those pictures that have a magic 3d picture hidden within, all the information is there but the only way to see it is to try and lose your focus.

[Lord Antares]

34 minutes ago, dimreepr said:

One is allowed to enjoy oneself don't make the mistake of assuming it means you can't be angry or sad or...

Really? Recently you've criticized me for getting angry at being woken up every morning. You were telling my that I should ignore it and divert my focus elsewhere. How is your case different?

Also, no offense, but ''inner peace'' isn't an actual term. It means something different to everybody. It's comes off as a bit pretentious that you would school people on it if they don't have the same view on it as you do.

I would define inner peace as being content with who you are and where you are in life. Being at peace with yourself. You can agree or disagree with me but that doesn't make me right or wrong.

[dimreepr]

1 minute ago, Lord Antares said:

Really? Recently you've criticized me for getting angry at being woken up every morning. You were telling my that I should ignore it and divert my focus elsewhere. How is your case different?

1

I didn't criticise you, I made a bad attempt at trying to help you (sorry about that), I was trying to get you to lose your focus.

[Lord Antares]

No offense taken but why does that not help in your case? Why don't you divert your own focus when you get angry?

[dimreepr]

1 minute ago, Lord Antares said:

Why don't you divert your own focus when you get angry?

Firstly, I didn't say 'divert' I said 'lose' and secondly I'm not trying to not get angry I'm allowing my anger to wash over me, rather than dam it.

[Lord Antares]

4 minutes ago, dimreepr said:

I'm allowing my anger to wash over me, rather than dam it.

What does that mean? You mean you stop being angry after some time? Obviously, anyone sane is going to do that. No one healthly is going to hold a grudge against a person online for the rest of their life because they insulted them...

[dimreepr]

1 minute ago, Lord Antares said:

What does that mean? You mean you stop being angry after some time? Obviously, anyone sane is going to do that. No one healthly is going to hold a grudge against a person online for the rest of their life because they insulted them...

In this context, it means don't focus on the reason for your anger, if you're trying to sleep just accept you're angry and think about sex, perhaps.

[koti]

I got it...inner-peace for me is when dimreepr is not telling me to be content with myself when pissing me off in the first place

[dimreepr]

10 minutes ago, koti said:

I got it...inner-peace for me is when dimreepr is not telling me to be content with myself when pissing me off in the first place

You can sneer all you want, it doesn't make me wrong...

[jimmydasaint]

7 hours ago, koti said:

When I hold my 18 month old in my arms I feel the same but I presume that both the mental and physical reactions of my body in that state are love not inner peace. I guess.

Love and peace go hand in hand surely. When you love something absolutely, do you not receive a feeling of inner peace? I do.  

I suppose that if you are able to replace hate by love, or be calm in the face of adversity as StringyJ mentioned, that is pretty close to achieving inner peace.  I think that the calming of thoughts is a good start.  I have not always been successful, as past confrontations with trolls will testify, but at least I try....

Edited October 27, 2017 by jimmydasaint
Sticky keyboard