I commented on his poets that you are always sentimental, then he deleted me on his WeChat. Am i wrong ?

[fresh]

I shared some articles and pictures of my life in my WeChat moments. A normal male friend kindly commented on them and we happily chatted for a while. Next day I went through his moments and read his poets I feel most of them are quite sentimental, so I left a comment there: you have a successful career and life why you are so unhappy ? he replies : nothing to do with my career, it is just how i feel about the life !  me : you seem always sentimental. then he replies: yes, quite.

Days later I found I was deleted from his WeChat....

Am I so wrong of saying such words to him ?  Is it true he is really sentimental ? Or I have very poor communication skill ?

Or what i said pissed him off and made him very angry with me. 

Other reasons ? 

I feel a bit sad. what a complicated guy and life !

[fiveworlds]

I wouldn't be stressing over it anyway. Do you really need somebody in your life who would discard you over something trivial? He hasn't given you the option of making amends because he doesn't value you enough to even attempt to work out the situation. So why try? other people will respect you more if he thinks he can treat you as disposable and isn't going to apologize for his behaviour then just ignore him.

[StringJunky]

42 minutes ago, fresh said:

I shared some articles and pictures of my life in my WeChat moments. A normal male friend kindly commented on them and we happily chatted for a while. Next day I went through his moments and read his poets I feel most of them are quite sentimental, so I left a comment there: you have a successful career and life why you are so unhappy ? he replies : nothing to do with my career, it is just how i feel about the life !  me : you seem always sentimental. then he replies: yes, quite.

Days later I found I was deleted from his WeChat....

Am I so wrong of saying such words to him ?  Is it true he is really sentimental ? Or I have very poor communication skill ?

Or what i said pissed him off and made him very angry with me. 

Other reasons ? 

I feel a bit sad. what a complicated guy and life !

Written words can convey things that we don't intend because they lack tone and the reader is left to decide the intent behind  those  words in a negative or positive light; depending on their mood at the time.

Edited September 1, 2018 by StringJunky

[fresh]

45 minutes ago, fiveworlds said:

I wouldn't be stressing over it anyway. Do you really need somebody in your life who would discard you over something trivial? He hasn't given you the option of making amends because he doesn't value you enough to even attempt to work out the situation. So why try? other people will respect you more if he thinks he can treat you as disposable and isn't going to apologize for his behaviour then just ignore him.

Yes, I feel I am nothing to him at all. I turn to be that sentimental person, not him.

Some people you respect but they don't do it back. 

25 minutes ago, StringJunky said:

Written words can convey things that we don't intend because they lack tone and the reader is left to decide the intent behind  those  words in a negative or positive light; depending on their mood at the time.

Yes, what's a moody and self-centered guy ! Some moody people ignore others' feeling. 

[dimreepr]

7 minutes ago, fresh said:

Yes, I feel I am nothing to him at all. I turn to be that sentimental person, not him.

Some people you respect but they don't do it back. 

People are people and we all have an agenda, that's why we need to learn forgiveness, lest we decide we're different.

[Phi for All]

1 hour ago, fresh said:

A normal male friend

I'm assuming you only know him from WeChat, since you could always ask him if you knew him IRL.

Here's what I think happened. You had a great chat with this guy, really clicked with him and both of you learned a lot about yourselves. This guy's girlfriend saw the difference in him, asked him what happened, he told her, and she became so jealous she sneaked into his account and deleted you.

Now, she's probably forcing school buses off the road while she looks for puppies to make herself a fur coat. It wasn't really about you at all.

[fresh]

8 minutes ago, Phi for All said:

I'm assuming you only know him from WeChat, since you could always ask him if you knew him IRL.

Here's what I think happened. You had a great chat with this guy, really clicked with him and both of you learned a lot about yourselves. This guy's girlfriend saw the difference in him, asked him what happened, he told her, and she became so jealous she sneaked into his account and deleted you.

Now, she's probably forcing school buses off the road while she looks for puppies to make herself a fur coat. 

you are so humorous, but i don't believe so. We met in reality not just internet. He moved to different city for a new job.

what i feel sad is what i feel about others is always not right 

why my judgement/feeling is SO poor ???? what a fake and complicated world !

Edited September 1, 2018 by fresh

[dimreepr]

4 minutes ago, fresh said:

you are so humorous, but i don't believe so. We met in reality not just internet. He moved to different city for a new job.

what i feel sad is what i feel about others is always not right 

why my judgement/feeling is SO poor ????

We're all in that boat, that's why we shouldn't judge a book by its cover, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. 

[fresh]

1 minute ago, dimreepr said:

We're all in that boat, that's why we shouldn't judge a book by its cover, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. 

Is it about the matters of the heart  ?

[Phi for All]

Just now, fresh said:

you are so humorous, but i don't believe so. We met in reality not just internet. He moved to different city for a new job.

what i feel sad is what i feel about others is always not right 

why my judgement/feeling is SO poor ????

There are still many reasons why he changed his account. If you can't know which one it is, you need to let it go.

Try to avoid making sweeping judgments about your judgment. We all make mistakes, and hopefully learn from them. The more you engage with others, the more chances you'll make a mistake, but also there will be more chances to learn. 

People are SO different, so you must just be yourself, engaging with all the different people. Don't put that pressure on yourself, thinking you have to know exactly how/what others are feeling, because we're all just too damned complicated for that. Just be you, and that will be fine. 

[fresh]

I remember once a guy asked me: 'have you had any experience that someone you chat quite well today then days later she ignores you?' 

i said:' no.' 

he said: 'Don't you think it is very strange? i don't get it at all !'

Yes, it is very strange, i don't get it at all too !

[dimreepr]

5 minutes ago, fresh said:

Is it about the matters of the heart  ?

I don't know, you tell me...

[fresh]

Just now, dimreepr said:

I don't know, you tell me...

[dimreepr]

5 minutes ago, fresh said:

Your mixing of the genders is quite revealing; I doubt anyone here will judge you for that.

[fresh]

I hate to be disliked by others, honestly speaking...when you have to deal with different people.

i am so tired and feel so annoyed to guess and conjecture what this guy is thinking ? and what that person is thinking of me ? particularly, in office, i have to deal with different bosses and colleagues. 

Edited September 1, 2018 by fresh

[Sensei]

2 hours ago, fresh said:

so I left a comment there: you have a successful career and life why you are so unhappy ? he replies : nothing to do with my career, it is just how i feel about the life !  me : you seem always sentimental. then he replies: yes, quite.

He can simply have depression or bipolar disorder. It has nothing to do with career or personal life.

 

7 minutes ago, fresh said:

i am so tired and feel so annoyed to guess and conjecture what this guy is thinking ? and what that person is thinking about me ?

He forgot about you 5 minutes after banning on forum..

 

7 minutes ago, fresh said:

what this guy is thinking ? particularly, in office, i have to deal with different bosses and colleagues. 

I don't think so.. They don't think about you. Especially if they have girlfriends/wives.

Edited September 1, 2018 by Sensei

[fresh]

5 minutes ago, dimreepr said:

Your mixing of the genders is quite revealing; I doubt anyone here will judge you for that.

doubt what ? you think he feels i have a crush on him and delete me ? is that bad ??? NO!

what makes me leave such impression on him ?

Edited September 1, 2018 by fresh

[dimreepr]

3 minutes ago, fresh said:

I hate to be disliked by others, honestly speaking...when you have to deal with different people.

Then smile, just in case...

[StringJunky]

4 minutes ago, fresh said:

doubt what ? you think he feels i have a crush on him and delete me ? is that bad ??? NO!

what makes me leave such impression on him ?

In internet parlance, you've been 'ghosted'. It's not nice the first time someone does it to you but next time won't hurt so much.

[fresh]

14 minutes ago, Sensei said:

He can simply have depression or bipolar disorder. It has nothing to do with career or personal life.

 

He forgot about you 5 minutes after banning on forum..

 

I don't think so.. They don't think about you. Especially if they have girlfriends/wives.

not that thinking about me....think of me... misunderstanding, it is did i do sth wrong ...some colleagues say good words in front of you while bad words behind me. 

Edited September 1, 2018 by fresh

[Phi for All]

10 minutes ago, fresh said:

I hate to be disliked by others, honestly speaking...

Do you like yourself? When you do, it's easier for others to see what you see.

"I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, I love all y'all, but I love me the most!" -- Meaghan Trainor

[StringJunky]

Just now, Phi for All said:

Do you like yourself? When you do, it's easier for others to see what you see.

"I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, I love all y'all, but I love me the most!" -- Meaghan Trainor

Yes, it's important for your sense of self worth not to totally rest on the actions and opinions of others.

[fresh]

2 minutes ago, Phi for All said:

Do you like yourself? When you do, it's easier for others to see what you see.

"I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, I love all y'all, but I love me the most!" -- Meaghan Trainor

so don't care too much ? 

[Phi for All]

1 minute ago, StringJunky said:

Yes, it's important for your sense of self worth not to totally rest on the actions and opinions of others.

It must have been hard for you living in your famous brother's shadow all the time. 

1 minute ago, fresh said:

so don't care too much ? 

I would say "Care as if you're life depended on it". If you care about yourself, you can't help care about others. It's obvious you aren't a narcissist, so I don't think you'll ever love yourself to the exclusion of everyone else. 

I think the mistake you're making is trying to assign some kind of unknowable motivation to another person's actions. There are so many reasons why people do things that it's silly for us to imagine only the one or two that hurt our feelings most. You're a good person, he's a good person, something happened to sever the connection you had with him, you're still good people. Look for more like that, and keep loving yourself and caring about others. 

[StringJunky]

21 minutes ago, fresh said:

...some colleagues say good words in front of you while bad words behind me. 

That happens to everybody, so don't think you are going to be left out.