Glider Posted August 21, 2005 Posted August 21, 2005 Asking friends to help matchmake isn't a desperate act. Friends love to help' date=' and admitting that it's hard to be objective about people you're attracted to is really very sensible. Our self-esteem is strong in areas we feel good about, and weak where we're shaky. A fix-up doesn't mean you're a fixer-upper, it just means you have friends who know you better than you know yourself.[/quote'] That's very well put. I agree. I think it often takes another to see the parts of you that you can't see yourself. Now, dont get me wrong....im not down on guys, i just havn't met the one who keeps me interested or the one who thinks slightly further than beer and sex (i dont have a problem with those things but i like to do other stuff too!) and until i meet the one who will make me sit up and listen, i'm going to have a great time with all my mates! Good approach I think knowing what you're looking for is a very good start. It'll come
Bettina Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Well, my dad won't let me out after dark. Thats pretty much it. Bettina
Klaynos Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 i guess your dad heard about yourdad. Rofl, we're such a collection of happy people
SorceressPol Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 1. I'm antisocial 2. oblivious 3. hypersensitive, so I don't like to be touched 4. I'm pretty, so I attract a lot of idiots
YT2095 Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 4. I'm pretty, so I attract a lot of idiots Hmmm... Modest as well eh!
SorceressPol Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Hmmm... Modest as well eh! Modest enough to go for brains. That's why I'm still single.
Klaynos Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Modest enough to go for brains. That's why I'm still single. Where are all these girls who go for brains? ||edit More importantly why don't I meet them! :S
Phi for All Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Where are all these girls who go for brains? More importantly why don't I meet them! :S Didn't you hear? They are antisocial, oblivious to you, don't want you to touch them and so pretty you probably convince yourself they are out of your league. So even if you do get up the courage to talk to them, you stutter and say something stupid and they turn you down since they were looking for brains. Vicious, vicious cycle.
Klaynos Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Didn't you hear? They are antisocial' date=' oblivious to you, don't want you to touch them and so pretty you probably convince yourself they are out of your league. So even if you do get up the courage to talk to them, you stutter and say something stupid and they turn you down since they were looking for brains. Vicious, vicious cycle. [/quote'] That is so depressingly true it's funny :|
Severian Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 I am happily married. The key to dating women is not to care. I think women can sense if you don't care and then latch onto you out of a certain self-destructiveness. Either that or people who don't care are more relaxed and can be themselves more easily, making them more atrtractive. I never really cared (I was always busy with other things) and never had any problem with women. In fact, the one woman I cared about was by far the most work, even though I got there in the end and am now married to her.
YT2095 Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 The key to dating women is not to care. I think women can sense if you don't care and then latch onto you out of a certain self-destructiveness. Either that or people who don't care are more relaxed and can be themselves more easily' date=' making them more atrtractive. In fact, the one woman I cared about was by far the most work.[/quote'] Very True! the ones I cared alot for didn`t reciprocate in any appreciable way (I got quite hurt and burried myself in work for a year or 2). the one I ended up marrying, I actualy fell asleep on her in a nightclub and was there happily dreaming away for about 2 hours before waking back up! my head was still on her shoulder, she`de not moved! it wasn`t so much that I "didn`t care" per se, I was just tired, but she probably got the "Not caring" impression, and thus, 8 years later we`re still together
ciderminx Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 i have to say guys......you have hit the nail on the head with your observations. When i guy seems not to care its makes you want to prove that you can get him if you want, but then when he does, there's not so much to work for! You gotta hope he still has the same appeal that made you want him in the first place! Maybe im just a heart breaker, or an evil bitch. There must be a happy medium somewhere.....
Callipygous Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 mines pretty basic. too shy to start up a conversation with a girl. oh yeah, i forgot the
bascule Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Still trying to inch my way up the Baldwin curve. It just sucks nature decided to start me off way at the bottom. Then again, I perform "neat tricks" daily that confuse the hell out of others, so it's give and take...
jdurg Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Mine is simple as well; I don't want to be in a relationship. I enjoy being with myself and hanging out with my friends and not having to be responsible for anyone but myself. I like going out and doing things that you just really can't do if you have a girlfriend. I also HATE going to bars. If I want to get drunk, I'm going to do it at my own place or when hanging out with my guy friends. I don't want to have to try and pull myself together in order to 'get with a girl'. If a girl wants to talk to me, then fine, she can talk to me all she wants. I'm not going to turn her away, but at the same time I'm not going to chase after her. The times I have gone out with a girl, I did so not because I wanted to get into her pants, but because her personality fit in so well with me. So if I had to make a list of reasons why I'm single, this would be it; 1): I like being alone. 2): It's cheaper that way. 3): I don't want to have to change who I am just to impress someone. If they like me, they'll like me for who I am, not for who I can act like. 4): I hate going to bars and clubs and whatnot. 5): I'm not about to make a girl feel awkward by asking her out in odd situations. (Like when with her friends, with her parents, at a gas station, etc. If I ask a girl out, it's generally when we're already on a date). 6): I'm not the type of person who wants to have sex on that first date, so I'm not going to go out of my way to try and get into her bed. Sadly, many girls these days only think about having sex on that first date and can't handle a guy who's takes things slowly. 7): I recently turned 25, and many of the girls my age now have children. I can barely be responsible enough to keep myself out of trouble, so how can I be responsible enough to deal with children? 8): I have no urge to find that right woman right now. Eventually it may happen, but if not I'm not going to cry about it.
Phi for All Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 mines pretty basic. too shy to start up a conversation with a girl.Based on what's been said, have someone else introduce you, then turn your back on her. This will imply you don't care AND give her a nice view of your well-formed buttocks.
mike90 Posted August 23, 2005 Posted August 23, 2005 Anyone notice that the people frequenting this site have a lot in common? Dare i suggest a SFN dating forum?
the tree Posted August 23, 2005 Posted August 23, 2005 No, you daren't. There are children here. Think of the children!
mike90 Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 Well in exciting late breaking news my girlfriend of 3 years just left me today, so i guess i'm back among the single again. I swear i would love to just live in a hut in the wilderness by myself
ydoaPs Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 I swear i would love to just live in a hut in the wilderness by myself that would be awesome. like camping, but for life. i love camping.
Phi for All Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 Well in exciting late breaking news my girlfriend of 3 years just left me today, so i guess i'm back among the single again.I'm guessing she wasn't too hot on your dating forum idea, huh? Don't worry, there's plenty of fish in the wilderness, just waiting for you to build a hut so they can decorate it.
Clara Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 Wow... I can't believe how many people here are single and lonely. Sometimes, I think I'm the only 17 year old girl that's still single, but I guess that's not true. I don't really know why I'm still single. Guys really seem to like me, but most of them don't seem to care about my personality. I guess most guys are like that. If you know a guy that has a girlfriend, ask him to describe his girlfriend. He will probably say something like, "She's hot" or something like that... I guess I want to find a guy that cares about my feelings and personality too. um' date=' i hate people in general. i am not attracted to any of the girls that i know are attracted to me. and the girls i like are like the following: <DragonflyBlade2> A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.[/quote'] I'm sure there are lots of girls that you could like, and they would like you too. I think the girl in DragonflyBlade2's story thought of the guy as a very good friend. She was probably worried that if he became her boyfriend, he wouldn't be her friend anymore. Sometimes when a girl loves someone, she has trouble talking to him about her problems. I'm sure she really did care about him, but she didn't want to lose a close friend that she could trust. The only girls that are attracted to me, are the really hot girls that all they know how to do is leech and so therefor I will NOT get involved with. When I look in the mirror, I wouldn't call myself a "hot girl". However, lots of guys say I'm really hot and everything. Anyway, if I am a "hot girl", my personality is probably the complete opposite of what you described. I'm sure that you can find a girl that you think is beautiful, and a nice person. You can never judge a person's personality just by looking at them. Well I've always been really shy, and tend to have a really low opinion of myself that ends up making me quiet and seemingly grumpy to people that dont know me. don't think im too much in the looks department either. And my interests are well, rather dorky. Don't worry about being shy, or quiet. If a girl doesn't want to take the time to get to know who you really are, then she isn't worth your time. I dislike being viewed as a "fixer-upper home-improvement" project (i.e. some women want to turn men into something they are not, which is very different from having and/or acquiring common interests) Don't let anyone change who you are. I'm sure that you can find the right person, and she will not try to change you. Well in exciting late breaking news my girlfriend of 3 years just left me today, so i guess i'm back among the single again. I swear i would love to just live in a hut in the wilderness by myself Aww... That's sad. I can only imagine how you must feel right now. Don't give up or blame yourself. Living in the wilderness is not going to make you feel better. You just need to find another person. I'm sure you will find the right person if you keep looking.
mike90 Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 Wow you sure have a good head on your shoulders Clara. My relationship with my gf was really rocky anyway so I guess in time I'll be alright. The only part that really bothers me is i stayed in it for her benefit more then once when i really didn't want to be in it anymore. And then she goes off and meets someone and leaves me after i stayed with her because she can't handle being alone and supposedly couldn't live without me. Well im officially done living my life trying to do what everyone else wants.
MetaFrizzics Posted August 24, 2005 Posted August 24, 2005 Many women treat men like jobs: they don't leave one unless they have another lined up waiting. They rarely seem without an escort. Too often men haven't a clue about immediate plans until they are sprung. Men are often simple and trusting, and defer to women.
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