Is Hell endothermic or exothermic

[entwined]

I got this in my email this morning, thought it was cute and want to share it with you guys N gals......

 

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Subject: Mid-term in Chemistry

 

The following is an actual question given on a University of

Washington Chemistry mid-term.

 

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor

shared it with colleagues,

via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure

of enjoying it as well.

 

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or

endothermic (absorbs heat)?

 

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's

Law (gas cools when it expands

and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

 

One student, however, wrote the following:

 

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So

we need to know the rate

at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are

leaving. I think that we can safely assume

that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no

souls are leaving. As for how many souls are

entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in

the world today. Most of these religions state that

if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.

Since there is more than one of these religions

and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can

project that all souls go to Hell.

 

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of

souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because

Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature

and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to

expand proportionately as souls are added.

 

This gives two possibilities:

 

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which

souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure

in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

 

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls

in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop

until Hell freezes over.

 

So which is it?

 

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my

Freshman year that,

"it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take

into account the fact that I slept with her last night,

then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is

exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it

follows that it is not accepting any more souls

and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the

existence of a divine being which explains

why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

 

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A

[Illuminati]

Hahaha, oh man, that's hillarious.

 

I only wonder what the professor thought while reading it.

[Glider]

 

I only wonder what the professor thought while reading it.

 

"Hahaha' date=' oh man, that's hillarious. [/i']" I would guess

[JohnB]

Ah, but can you fault his logic?

[shush]

I don't agree with him getting an A. He should have got an A+!

 

The only point I would like to question is his assumption of hell being thermodynamically isolated. What if the souls of dead trees are being burnt to continually add heat to the system from outside?

[JohnB]

What if the souls of dead trees are being burnt to continually add heat to the system from outside?

Nah, that effect is counteracted by the souls of dead glaciers.

[quantum.INF]

Funniest Thing Ever! "He should have got an A+!"