Finding a mate.

[Rebiu]

How do most people meet prospective partners? Through much of human history partners were met through family connections. With the decrease in family size and influence there has been no effective replacement. Many people meet at school and work but this is becoming progressively more restricted by work and company rules. Given the soaring divorce and single parent family rates I would suggest a more efficient means of social pairing be devised. Any suggestions?

[Keki516]

How about e-harmony? Haha

I personally don't like the idea of blind dates, especially if it is someone over the internet and there isn't a mutual firend to verify that the person isn't crazy.

[padren]

I'd suggest via hobbies.

 

If you like hiking, kayaking, racket ball, climbing, chess, drinking heavily, amature astronomy, photography, crashing support groups, bridge, music, dancing, poker, or any other number of personal interests, go out and do these things or find events centering on them within the community, and enjoy doing your own thing there (ie, don't "work the room" but be there just to have fun).

 

That way you are regularily meeting like-minded people, hopefully expanding your horizons in general, and really if you do go out a lot you'll meet interesting people, as a general rule.

 

Don't let divorce rates etc get you down either, chances are like all of us you have your own baggage and don't have to worry about carrying the culture's baggage on your shoulders too.

[Rebiu]

Thank you for the input.

I'd suggest via hobbies.

 

If you like hiking' date=' kayaking, racket ball, climbing, chess, drinking heavily, amature astronomy, photography, crashing support groups, bridge, music, dancing, poker, or any other number of personal interests, go out and do these things or find events centering on them within the community, and enjoy doing your own thing there (ie, don't "work the room" but be there just to have fun).

 

That way you are regularily meeting like-minded people, hopefully expanding your horizons in general, and really if you do go out a lot you'll meet interesting people, as a general rule.

 

Don't let divorce rates etc get you down either, chances are like all of us you have your own baggage and don't have to worry about carrying the culture's baggage on your shoulders too.[/quote']Most of these events have a heavy gender imbalance. I train with a fairly wide range of people but see few women in these circles. Men and women usually have different interests.

 

I have been married for 9 years and have my third child on the way incidentally.

[Rebiu]

How about e-harmony? Haha

I personally don't like the idea of blind dates' date=' especially if it is someone over the internet and there isn't a mutual firend to verify that the person isn't crazy.[/quote']I agree.

[ecoli]

Probably school is the best way. There are tons of universities where men and women come together from all over to learn. PLus if you live on campus, that's another way people come together.

 

My parents met on a work study program. My aunt and uncle met in college... I'm wonder how many people have met this way.

[cosine]

Probably school is the best way. There are tons of universities where men and women come together from all over to learn. PLus if you live on campus' date=' that's another way people come together.

 

My parents met on a work study program. My aunt and uncle met in college... I'm wonder how many people have met this way.[/quote']

School is a great opportunity for these things, but only a certain percentage of people go to school, and this would put a huge time pressure on people not ready yet for school. I've had one girlfriend already and that relationship lasted 2 years. I may know to work a little faster now but even at half that rate, that would allow me to try how many different potential partners before graduation? And just finding these type things to begin with takes so much time in itself.

[Rebiu]

School is a great opportunity for these things, but only a certain percentage of people go to school, and this would put a huge time pressure on people not ready yet for school. I've had one girlfriend already and that relationship lasted 2 years. I may know to work a little faster now but even at half that rate, that would allow me to try how many different potential partners before graduation? And just finding these type things to begin with takes so much time in itself.

There is to little time to sort through a huge group of people. There needs to be some mechanism to narrow the range down and accelerate the rate of exposure.