Dating

[herme3]

Why? Assuming one girl in the world is The one then you start off by having to chose 1 girl from all of the world' date=' if that doesn't work then you have to chose a girl from all of the world minus 1. Each time it doesn't work then you can minus one, eventually you will be left with 1.

 

You might argue that you messed up your chance and so you missed The one. Why do you say it's wrong? Assuming you do not screw up with The one then each time it doesn't work there are less people to chose from, so instead of being 1 in 100 girls it is now 1 in 99, so statistically you are more likely to chose correctly from 99 than you are from 100.[/quote']

 

The problem here is that there are billions of girls in the world. Even if you exclude all the people outside your age group, you are left with millions of girls who are your age. How could anyone find "The One" in such a large group?

 

The pool is effectively infinite because you may meet the person who would be perfect for you at the wrong time.

 

Well, I guess if you find the girl who you know is "The One" you could just keep trying until you find the right time.

[Callipygous]

The problem here is that there are billions of girls in the world. Even if you exclude all the people outside your age group' date=' you are left with millions of girls who are your age. How could anyone find "The One" in such a large group?

 

Well, I guess if you find the girl who you know is "The One" you could just keep trying until you find the right time.[/quote']

 

 

maybe... but given how many happily married couples there are out there, is it really likely that they all picked out "the One" out those millions of men and women? or is it more likely that human biology includes some predisposition toward attachment and when you find someone with a personality that complements your own you fall in love and can live happily together? (and could also have done so with any number of other people with that general personality, if only you had met them first)

[herme3]

maybe... but given how many happily married couples there are out there, is it really likely that they all picked out "the One" out those millions of men and women? or is it more likely that human biology includes some predisposition toward attachment and when you find someone with a personality that complements your own you fall in love and can live happily together? (and could also have done so with any number of other people with that general personality, if only you had met them first)

 

In that case, why is there only one person that I ever wanted to go on a date with?

[Callipygous]

In that case, why is there only one person that I ever wanted to go on a date with?

 

 

cause your too shy to have met/gotten to know very many girls.

[bluesmudge]

finally this thread is making sense - Herme3 likes that girl he hangs round with at school, and she won't go on a date with him right?

 

But you like her so much that you won't go on a date with other girls so then she'll know you really like her.

 

IF you had the same social life as most of us you'd be of the same opinion, as it is you know one girl, and assume shes the one - theres a saying which generally girls use but i think it applys - You have to kiss alot of frogs before you find a Prince

[herme3]

finally this thread is making sense - Herme3 likes that girl he hangs round with at school' date=' and she won't go on a date with him right?

 

But you like her so much that you won't go on a date with other girls so then she'll know you really like her.[/quote']

 

Exactly.

 

IF you had the same social life as most of us you'd be of the same opinion, as it is you know one girl, and assume shes the one.

 

Well, I've known some other girls but none of them really seemed special to me.

 

You have to kiss alot of frogs before you find a Prince

 

Right, but why would someone kiss a frog if they already found a Prince?

[Cap'n Refsmmat]

Right, but why would someone kiss a frog if they already found a Prince?

Perhaps the Prince turned out gay.

[herme3]

Perhaps the Prince turned out gay.

 

Huh? I'm not gay, and the girl isn't gay either.

[Cap'n Refsmmat]

Huh? I'm not gay, and the girl isn't gay either.

I'm saying perhaps they found a prince that ended up being someone they didn't want. A lot of people think they've found the "perfect person" and they end up divorcing in a few years.

[augment]

I don't have the time to read through pages of post and only have a couple of things to say regarding herme3's original post:

 

1. You're a total minge. I recommend you go have your T-levels checked.

 

2. If your username herme3 is suppose to refer to the Greek god Hermes, because if it is you should know that Hermes had numerous affairs with goddesses, nymphs, and mortals and in some legends with sheeps and goats.

Hermes

[herme3]

I'm saying perhaps they found a prince that ended up being someone they didn't want. A lot of people think they've found the "perfect person" and they end up divorcing in a few years.

 

Perhaps, but why would I have only liked one person in my whole life? I can't think of anyone else who has liked only one girl. Doesn't that mean there is something special about her?

 

I don't have the time to read through pages of post and only have a couple of things to say regarding herme3's original post...

 

Maybe you should have read through some of the posts before making a reply. You would have realized that Bluesmudge figured out why I feel this way. Bluesmudge said what was on my mind throughout this whole thread. I guess I never realized what exactly was on my mind, or I just never thought of a good way to say it.

 

If your username herme3 is suppose to refer to the Greek god Hermes' date=' because if it is you should know that Hermes had numerous affairs with goddesses, nymphs, and mortals and in some legends with sheeps and goats.

Hermes

 

No. My username has nothing to do with Hermes.

[bluesmudge]

Perhaps' date=' but why would I have only liked one person in my whole life? I can't think of anyone else who has liked only one girl. Doesn't that mean there is something special about her?

[/quote']

 

No, believe me no.

 

Im sure shes great, but im willing to bet she isn't 'the one'

If shes said no to you once do you really want to keep going on till she says yes? when / if she finally says yes im sure you'll be thinking does she really like me or have i just forced her into this?

 

From the way you described your social life I doubt you've met nearly enough girls to make a decision about who is 'the one' - and as someone else has said theres no such thing as 'the one', but you'll find someone that compliments you.

 

Oh and if this girl knows you spend 99% of your time in your bedroom you won't even be considered as boyfriend material, she might be thinking hes just gonna spend his time in his room and not be any fun.

 

Get out more, get a social hobbie, talk to random people at school and you'll go far.

[herme3]

Im sure shes great' date=' but im willing to bet she isn't 'the one'

If shes said no to you once do you really want to keep going on till she says yes? when / if she finally says yes im sure you'll be thinking does she really like me or have i just forced her into this?[/quote']

 

She is a great person. I think the problem is me, not her. I need to find out why she doesn't like me, and how I can become a better person. Whenever I try to ask her, she tries to change the subject. However, before I tried to ask her out on a date she said that I will make some girl very happy one day. Another time, she said that I was one of the sweetest guys that she knows. I'm confused...

 

Oh and if this girl knows you spend 99% of your time in your bedroom you won't even be considered as boyfriend material, she might be thinking hes just gonna spend his time in his room and not be any fun.

 

I really don't want to live this type of life. I really want to go out in the real world, but I don't have anyone to go anywhere with. Whenever I go out in the real world, I usually feel isolated and alone.

[john5746]

She is a great person. I think the problem is me, not her. I need to find out why she doesn't like me, and how I can become a better person. Whenever I try to ask her, she tries to change the subject. However, before I tried to ask her out on a date she said that I will make some girl very happy one day. Another time, she said that I was one of the sweetest guys that she knows. I'm confused...

 

Kind of like when you see a little dog and it looks cute. You like it and pet it. Then, it keeps trying to hump your leg - very irritating, so you kick it in the sack and tell it to bum off. Understand now?

[5614]

I really don't want to live this type of life. I really want to go out in the real world, but I don't have anyone to go anywhere with. Whenever I go out in the real world, I usually feel isolated and alone.

School or college or uni or work is a great place to meet some people. Before you go to wherever that day try and think of a few things you could talk about (what they did over easter or passover, what you did (make it slightly interesting!), how study/work is going etc.) and go up to someone who you know, or at least recognises you and talk to them for a bit.

 

When I started 6th Form a few months back I remember there was this new guy that came into class and didn't know anyone so kinda sat near the door, next to me. So I started talking, ya know, where ya from and who are ya kinda thing... and now we're friends.

 

You've just gotta start talkin!

 

Once you do that people will start to know. Once they know you they can be your friends. Then you will have someone to go out with, wherever you want. Maybe out to the cinema or the pub depending on your age and fake ID!

[herme3]

Kind of like when you see a little dog and it looks cute. You like it and pet it. Then, it keeps trying to hump your leg - very irritating, so you kick it in the sack and tell it to bum off. Understand now?

 

You got it all wrong...

 

First of all, asking someone out on a date isn't anything close to humping someone's leg. If they mean the same thing to you, I'm sure that you've never gone on more than one date with anyone.

 

Read some of my other posts in other threads, and you will see that I feel strongly about treating girls with the respect they deserve. You will understand how I feel about relationships, and what is important in a relationship.

 

The girl doesn't hate me and she never got mad at me. She is still my best friend, and we always have friendly conversations in school.

 

5614, thanks for your advice. I always try to be friendly to people.

[Royston]

She is a great person. I think the problem is me, not her. I need to find out why she doesn't like me, and how I can become a better person

 

That speaks volumes about you Herme3. You need to start liking yourself before you can even get into a relationship, it will cause problems if your self esteem is so low, that you have to resort to changing yourself to suit one person before actually seeing that person. That all comes naturally, if the relationship progresses...e.g you can pick up each others habits, mannerisms et.c

 

I don't think starting a relationship by acting out all the things that she likes is going to work...at all. You have to both be comfortable with being yourselves.

[Callipygous]

You got it all wrong...

 

First of all' date=' asking someone out on a date isn't anything close to humping someone's leg. If they mean the same thing to you, I'm sure that you've never gone on more than one date with anyone.

 

Read some of my other posts in other threads, and you will see that I feel strongly about treating girls with the respect they deserve. You will understand how I feel about relationships, and what is important in a relationship.

 

The girl doesn't hate me and she never got mad at me. She is still my best friend, and we always have friendly conversations in school.

 

5614, thanks for your advice. I always try to be friendly to people.[/quote']

 

 

he actually pretty much nailed it, aside from the dog being more direct.

 

your great friends, shes happy to have friendly interaction with you (petting) but when you tried to take it beyond that into something sexual(humping her leg), or romantic if your more comfortable with that phrasing, she wasnt comfortable with that.

 

if you dont take her hint and continue to try to persue that kind of relationship (keep trying to hump her leg) eventually shes going to get irritated with the fact that you cant realise that she just isnt interested in that kind of relationship with you(which is really as complicated as it is... shes just not interested) then eventually shes going to "kick you in the sack" to help you get the picture. she probably wont actually kick you in the sack, but if you keep pushing her after she's said no, and clearly shows she doesnt want to discuss it, as she changes the subject, then shes going to find a way to get the message across. if you irritate her enough she might turn to a more unpleasant way of telling you.

 

if you really like this girl try to be her friend, cause thats your best option for maintaining ANY relationship with her. if you keep trying to take your friendship to the next step(and asking her what it is about you she doesnt like falls under this catagory) shes going to get uncomfortable and it will damage your friendship.

[john5746]

First of all' date=' asking someone out on a date isn't anything close to humping someone's leg. If they mean the same thing to you, I'm sure that you've never gone on more than one date with anyone.

[/quote']

 

Ata Boy! good comeback. See, you should get out more, trade insults.

 

Actually, it took me most of college to finally realize that talking to girls while drunk and slobering was not a way to get laid, unless I wanted to be scared in the morning!

 

Some learn quicker than others I guess.

[herme3]

he actually pretty much nailed it' date=' aside from the dog being more direct.

 

your great friends, shes happy to have friendly interaction with you (petting) but when you tried to take it beyond that into something sexual(humping her leg), or romantic if your more comfortable with that phrasing, she wasnt comfortable with that.

 

if you dont take her hint and continue to try to persue that kind of relationship (keep trying to hump her leg) eventually shes going to get irritated with the fact that you cant realise that she just isnt interested in that kind of relationship with you(which is really as complicated as it is... shes just not interested) then eventually shes going to "kick you in the sack" to help you get the picture. she probably wont actually kick you in the sack, but if you keep pushing her after she's said no, and clearly shows she doesnt want to discuss it, as she changes the subject, then shes going to find a way to get the message across. if you irritate her enough she might turn to a more unpleasant way of telling you.

 

if you really like this girl try to be her friend, cause thats your best option for maintaining ANY relationship with her. if you keep trying to take your friendship to the next step(and asking her what it is about you she doesnt like falls under this catagory) shes going to get uncomfortable and it will damage your friendship.[/quote']

 

Well, actually I'm not sure if I wanted to ask her out on a date just because I "like" her. I think it might be more because I care about her. She's had quite a few ex-boyfriends, and none of them seemed to be very nice to her. She's such a nice and caring person, and I don't want to see her keep getting into boyfriend/girlfriend relationships where the guy ends up hurting her feelings at the end. I've seen it happen so many times, and I can tell how sad it always makes her feel. I guess that might be the main reason for everything I've said about dating in this thread, and other threads.

[1veedo]

Yeah, men are bad about hurting people's feelings. That's why you never want to be in a gay relationship. They always end up breaking your heart in the end.

 

Trust me.

[Callipygous]

Yeah' date=' men are bad about hurting people's feelings. That's why you never want to be in a gay relationship. They always end up breaking your heart in the end.

 

Trust me.[/quote']

 

 

swell.

 

any other generalized, stereotypical nonsense anyone would like to share? i figured we could try to get it all out of the way at once.

[The Peon]

I am so tired of seeing dating web sites that claim you will find "happiness". They should be taken off the Internet because dating is completely pointless. There is absolutely no sense in deciding that you want a boyfriend or girlfriend and then go "looking" for one. I can name several girls that have asked me out on a date' date=' and I simply said, "no". You will never find true happiness by dating.

 

You must wait until you find the perfect person. You should find somebody with a great personality, and somebody who will really care about you forever. You must find someone who cares about you for who you really are, not who you can pretend to be.

 

I am a guy, but I must say that the way most guys treat their girlfriends is just awful. They often choose a girlfriend because of the way she looks, not because of her personality. If I ever listen to two guys talking about their girlfriends, I usually feel sorry for the girls, who actually think the guys care about them. Some guys actually say stuff like, "Well, she's really hot, but she always wants to talk to me. I'm sick of listening to her problems and acting like I care about her feelings." I feel like the whole purpose of a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is caring about somebody's feelings, and also knowing that person cares about you.

 

I also don't understand when guys brag about how many girlfriends they've had. They act like it is a good thing that they've hurt so many girls' feelings! I've also heard guys say stuff like, "I'm going to date that girl over there. When we breakup, I'm going to date that girl in our other class." What is the point in even thinking about getting a girlfriend when you are already planning on breaking up with them! How can anyone care so little about another person's feelings?

 

It is often surprising to people that I have never had a girlfriend. However, I can also say that I've never broken up with anyone before. When people come together, and then breakup, it only causes pain for both people. I suppose that I may never find that "perfect person", and I'll probably always be alone. Yes, it sounds like a very depressing life for me. However, I won't ever have to worry about hurting an innocent girl's feelings.[/quote']

 

 

Gotta agree mostly with the original post. All the fantastic woman I have met have been totally by accident. When I am "looking" I mostly either find sex or nothing (or both combined).

[herme3]

Gotta agree mostly with the original post...

 

That might not be a very good idea. When I wrote this, I had something else on my mind, but for some reason it all came out as a rant against dating. It's crazy because even though I've never gone on a date, I have nothing against dating. I even used to own an online dating service. For some reason, it took several months for someone to figure out what was really on my mind. I'm not even sure if I knew what was on my mind during the 3 months that I was ranting like an idiot...

 

Callipygous and everyone else who had to listen to my ranting must think I'm crazy!

[5614]

Woo, you've had a real turn around in what you're saying in this and another thread... what's happened to ya?