Dating

[insane_alien]

Herme3, from what you've said in this thread(and others) she is the only girl you know(besides relatives and teachers). How do you know that there is nobody else out there? Why not go to a club or something and start meeting people. or join some sort of club/society outside of school. something you like doing so that you'll meet people with similar interests.

 

If you are adamant about trying to get with her and won't even consider another option. Ask her if she wants to hang out after school, go to the cinema, mall, whatever is popular... if she says yes, just go and hang out, don't try and push or force anything.just hang out. if she says no, thats fine. it doesn't mean your a loser.

 

i still think you should move on.

[padren]

I already found her' date=' and I've been talking about her in the last several pages of this thread. The problem is me, not her. She is like a perfect angel. If someone like her doesn't want to be with someone like me, what makes everyone so sure that someone else will? If I keep looking, the same thing will happen over and over again. I'll find other good people in this world, but none of them will want to be with someone like me.

 

I'm the one who needs to figure out how to change. I need to be a better person, not just go looking for another girl to reject me.[/quote']

 

Seriously, stop trying to impress her and do the things that make you feel more confident in yourself. When someone tries to change who they are to please you, it creeps you out, as a rule. You need to figure out who you are and, quite possibly, when you do, you'll end up turning out to be the sort of person who that girl would be interested in. If not, the only logical conclusion one can take is that you don't know why she isn't perfect for you but that she isn't, and only misery would come of it while perfectly compatible girls don't get a second look from you.

 

Don't try to figure out what she wants and how to become that though - for the love of god...don't do that. Find the things you want to change about yourself, and you'll end up both figuring out who you are and gaining the personal confidence you need to be successful in dating anyway.

 

Find yourself first.

[herme3]

No, you need to find someone that suits you properly, rather than trying to make yourself fit to them.

 

I don't think there is anyone. Everyone thinks I'm crazy or just weird. I think I'm a little crazy and weird too, which is why I want to change. If I could be someone I want to be, I would also probably be someone she wants me to be.

 

I'm not talking about being a bully, or a mean guy, or anything like that. I'm just talking about becoming a normal teenager. Right now, everyone thinks I'm like a mad scientist who never goes outside.

 

Find the things you want to change about yourself

 

I don't even know where to begin...

[padren]

I don't even know where to begin...

 

Start with thinking about the types of guys you admire or have elements you really respect. Do you want to be more buff? If so, decide on what you want to do (walk, hit the gym, swim, etc) to get there and then make it happen, and measure the results along the way. Do you want to be more familiar with the great literary giants of the times? Find some good books and read all the poety and novels you can, but pick out what you want to start out with when etc and get into it. Do you want to be more comfortable in social situations? Make a plan to try to talk to a new person every week...strike up one random conversation a week, or, better yet, one a day. Whatever you feel comfortable with.

In addition to that, anything that is an interest, from the inner workings of the UN and global politics to plant biology....just dive on into the subject and learn what you can, slowly and steadily.

 

It may seem like there is a chasm between who you want to be and where you are, but it really is just a series of steps and taking the time, effort and continued willpower to get from here to there.

 

This is your time to be alive and you really can shape yourself any way you want to be...you should feel full of hope and promise that anything is possible, not sorrowful of where you fall short of your hopes.

 

I can already tell you are intelligent and have a decent sense of introspection, and if you throw in a little determination that is all you need to shape your life anyway you want. It may take years, but it will happen and it will take you farther than anyone who is simply comfortable with themselves and have a simple map planned out for their life.

 

Jump in and seize the day.

[bascule]

I already found her, and I've been talking about her in the last several pages of this thread.

 

You have no frame of reference from which to make that assertion.

 

The problem is me, not her.

 

Yes, sounds like she's out of your league.

 

She is like a perfect angel.

 

No, she's a normal falliable human being with all sorts of problems which you either choose to ignore or don't know about yet because you haven't spent enough time with her. How long have you ever been together alone with her?

 

You have some perfect archetypical image of her in her head. Chances are she's nothing like that. The more time you spend with her the more you'll realize that the fantasy image you have of her in your head is nothing like the real person.

 

If I were you I'd go to this girl, apologize, and ask for her help with girls. Ask her if she has any friends who she thinks might make a good match for you. That way you can let her know that you are trying to move on and can hopefully improve your friendship with her. If you become better friends with her, you can spend more time with her and perhaps learn how much your mental model deviates from the real person.

 

If someone like her doesn't want to be with someone like me, what makes everyone so sure that someone else will?

 

You don't know that, however you do know this girl doesn't want to be with you. There's another 3 and a half or so billion women on this planet you haven't tried yet. You can assume at least a few dozen million of them are pretty desperate.

 

If I keep looking, the same thing will happen over and over again. I'll find other good people in this world, but none of them will want to be with someone like me.

 

If that's your attitude, then that statement will be correct. Jesus christ, get a little self-confidence. There's probably at least one girl you know who has a crush on you: it's your job to figure out who that girl is.

 

I'm the one who needs to figure out how to change. I need to be a better person, not just go looking for another girl to reject me.

 

Step one is to form a circle of close friends and hang out with them on a regular basis. At least every other day or so, and every weekend unless you have a conflict. Once you have friends they can introduce you to people. Make friends with guys who have girlfriends, ask for their advice on relationships, and ask their girlfriends if they have any friends who are looking for someone and might be interested with you. Seriously, that's one of the easiest ways to meet girls that I know. You need a social network you can leverage for help, and it sounds like that's what you're desperately lacking right now.

[Callipygous]

The girl of your dreams is out there waiting for you. Go find her!

 

I already found her' date=' and I've been talking about her in the last several pages of this thread. The problem is me, not her. She is like a perfect angel. If someone like her doesn't want to be with someone like me, what makes everyone so sure that someone else will? If I keep looking, the same thing will happen over and over again. I'll find other good people in this world, but none of them will want to be with someone like me.

 

I'm the one who needs to figure out how to change. I need to be a better person, not just go looking for another girl to reject me.[/quote']

 

 

your dream is to be with a girl who doesnt want you?

[ecoli]

I don't think there is such thing as the 'dream girl.' They'll be girls who you get along with, like alot, perhaps even learn to love. But, nobody is perfect, and relationships take work and time, especially if your after a meaningful one.

 

But, if it didn't take work to succeed, I doubt they'd be half so meaningful. What tastes sweeter, honey that was handed to you, or honey that you had to work hard to get?

[Callipygous]

which one has the higher sugar content?

[sabbath]

I think padren's the man to listen to herme3.

 

What I can say is, based on personal experience, is that you'll never feel that other people like you/will like you if you don't like yourself first.

 

I personally have many insecurities and because of them I often doubt people's sincerity in their appreciation of who I am. You said you don't know where to begin, however, wanting to change is a good beginning as any other.

 

Not that you should change for anyone, even for the girl of your dreams. You should change, and only change, for yourself. I for one, am always looking for ways to enrich who I am intellectually, socially, and emotionally. That's because I want to. You see I dislike being so clumsy and committing errors all the time. I try to do something about it. There is always room for improvement because there is no perfect person and hence, as ecoli says "no dream girl".

 

I think you should try to be more confident. Moping around won't help, but I understand when you say that you're just not the type to get out there and have friends (being chatty and everything). I was once like that, I almost always stayed at one corner of the room. Maybe you can start by smiling at people.

 

If somebody tries to talk to you, don't drive them away. You have to take little steps, one at a time. Try lengthening a conversation with other people, like your lab partners or something. There is always interaction happening somewhere, don't let it fall short, try lengthening it. If first it fails, try again. You never know, there might be other people just like you.

 

I was gifted/cursed with a strong personality. I almost always scared people away with it. I was a very talkative kid, but I felt that no one really understood me. So in high school I was much of a recluse after my former friends began to adapt into their social spheres. But I found people who were as weird as me or those who were intelligent enough to bear it and understand.

 

I think for one, if ever I met you, I might have been your friend. Someone with sensitivity and frailty (I'm sorry, but somehow you seem that way to me) like you would interest me very much. My friends for example, are very intersting people in their own right, and yes, very very weird. But the good thing is, we let each other's idiosyncrasies run free. There is no loser in our group. You should find a support system. And you'll find that at this age, in your friends.

 

I'm not saying that you should replace this girl you like. But don't get hung up on only her. Widen your world, learn more, get to know more people. Don't limit yourself on only seeing her beauty, look into other people (the real them) and get to see their beauty, too. If you still remain to be awed by hers, then maybe that will help you figure your feelings out.

 

You have friends here on the net (we are guys aren't we?) but it is also essential to have friends in real life because those are more tangible, and these people are the ones who are really going to be there for you in the flesh.

 

insane alien advised you to join clubs and organizations and I think that it's sound. Are you interested in red cross or community service? science and techies stuff? You should go and join one. As padren has put in one way or another you'll have to put effort into it. I don't think you can change on your own, you'll have to have other people's help on that.

 

I used to limit myself and put restrictions on how I acted. When I realized that wasn't the person I wanted to become, I began to open myself to new thoughts and lines of thinking, to new choices, and different perspectives.

 

Before I generally only wore white and black and blue. I told myself what the heck I'm going to try out green! I was boyish so I decided to be radical and went for pink. I realized that whatever I wore was okay, I could carry it. So now, I can wear any color I want because I am comfortable in them and with myself. I never became girly like the rest, but on the days that I want to, I can be. And on the days that I want to be just sloppy, I am.

 

Though I think it's bad to just try and fit in with the norm, I think subconsciously we still attempt to do so. My advise is just go with what is comfortable, but try something new everyday. I hope you'll get more fun into your life through that. I surely did. My key to happiness is curiosity and unending learning. But I never forget my compassion for other people and I think that's important. And you already have that.

 

Perhaps it may also be the cause of your hurts. You'll have to learn to shield and protect yourself without losing empathy for other people. Just don't build strongwalls between you and others or you'll stay inside your fortress forever. We all have to get hurt some time. And you know what? That was how I gained greater and lasting happiness. I had always felt that happiness was fleeting and it was my opinion that the happier you get, the harder it is when you fall and it is most likely that sadness follows bliss. I was of that opinion, and sometimes it still seems that way.

 

Okay I know I'm being vague...perhaps I should tell you how it was with me. People say I take things too seriously and I guess I did. There was somebody who had always been around my circle of friends, and he was just that. But I don't know what happened, something did for sure though. I was just one day, convinced that he was "THE ONE". It was stupid, but I didn't know that then. And the thing was I was so happy. It was the first time I felt anything like it, I don't know if it was love, but it had felt as though it was.

 

The thing was he told some of my friends that he felt something for me. And they told me. I wouldn't let myself believe it was true. I didn't think I was likable enough. Besides, he never showed any signs, never told me anything. I grew sad, especially because he began to be very sociable towards other girls. I was angry, I couldn't understand how I felt. I drew away. I became distant, I didn't want to get hurt, even though I was already hurting. It all seems so full of drama now, and maybe it was. But nothing happened, and I think that's what hurt me, because he didn't think what he felt was worth enough to pursue. And I thought I never could feel that kind of happiness again.

 

But as always, I was wrong. I found other ways to be happy, and I realized I didn't have to depend my happiness on anybody. I could be happy just because I was who I am. Each day as I see a part of me grow up, I rejoice, and each part of me that still remains a child also makes me happy. It's wonderful enough to be alive and to be able to think the way I can, and see the world whether in its ugliness or beauty. That alone makes me happy. For me this is the profoundity of life, and this is what makes me happy.

 

I hope you will find who you are inside and discover your true potentials. I hope you realize that you can be this kind of person that you want to be just because you want to be that way. And I hope that makes you happy, and sets you free from other people.

 

It is so much better to choose to relate to other people because you want to, and not just because you need to. Though you really do need other people, but don't look for friends because you need their company but because you enjoy it.

 

I've just rambled on like I usually do. I hope I've been a help. As always I shall continue to listen. Say what you want herme3, that in itself is a step you've accomplished here. You'll just have to bring it to real life.

 

These were the wisest and most foolish things I could think up. The best to you!

[mike90]

Well i was gonna post some more advice, but i dont think i could say it any better then she did. The only thing i can add is however much of a reject you feel like, people do like you man. I know a friendship over the net isnt the same as a " real" one. But for what its worth i like you herme, and if you need someone to talk to you can pm me anytime. Dont sell yourself so short, you seem like a pretty decent guy. Trust me when i tell you a large part of how lost you feel is a part of the age your at, and with any luck it gets better over time. Just dont stop trying ok?

[alice]

Herme3, can you really accept your being a LOSER? Dude, you've got to do something about that. No one is a loser.

 

You've got it all figured out..."I need to change...blahblahblah.." Well? What are you going to change? Hmm...you need to have more confidence...be less negative...she probably likes you for a certain attitude of yours..or something...so don't change the part of you that she likes, ok?

 

What am I saying?

[alice]

They said it all herme3. Hmm...I can't think of anything better to say..err...write. I think I've used up my brain on you.

 

To make it short...maybe you need a makeover! Queer Eye For The Straight Guy, where are you?

 

Seriously, though. Start small. Start with the way you look. Change your wardrobe...comb your hair...buy new shoes...take a bath...pluck your eyebrows...or whatever it is that can make you look good. It helps. The way you look can help you boost your confidence.

 

Start smiling to people you meet. That's what I did. I am a very quiet girl and I always frown. People get scared of me because of that. So I changed the way I am. Though I don't always smile like when I was a little girl. I was sweet and charming...as what my mom described me...but I am not what i was then. I am bitter and rude. So people get scared of me. I didn't want it that way..so I changed...I started talking to people...smiling at whoever I meet...smile...as in --> . Don't smile like you want to eat them or something...

 

What else..hmm...I think that's about it. Please remember that to others you may be a loser..but to one you are not. There is a girl for you out there...you have your very own counterpart. So have a little hope...you won't die alone.

 

The best of luck! May you find your true self and be happy! If only fairy godmothers were true...you'd live happily ever after!

[herme3]

Yes, sounds like she's out of your league.

 

I did some thinking, and I think there might be a different problem. I don't think she has anything against me, and I'm not even sure that she doesn't like me. When I first said I liked her, she seemed happy. She still seems happy whenever I compliment her. I think my main problem is my reputation among other students.

 

We always have more friendly conversations when just the two of us are talking. When some of her friends are around, she normally doesn't say that much to me. Recently, I said "hi" to her when some of her friends were nearby, and she smiled at me and just whispered, "hey". It was almost like she didn't want her friends to hear her.

 

I don't exactly have the best reputation among other people. Most people seem to think I'm crazy. I know there are a lot of rumors about me going around that simply aren't true. Some of the people I've heard spreading these rumors are friends with the girl I'm talking about. If the girl ever hears the rumors, I really doubt she would believe them. She is my best friend, and she knows my personality better than anyone else. However, she might worry about what her friends will think if she goes on a date with someone like me.

 

The girl is very popular, and she has lots of friends. Why would she risk losing some of her friends just to go on a date with someone like me? She is such a great person, that she could probably go on a date with any guy she wants to. I really can't blame her for not wanting to go on a date with me. She knows I'm a nice guy, but why would she choose me if she could be with someone who is considered to be more "normal"?

 

These were the wisest and most foolish things I could think up.

 

Thank you, Sabbath, for all of your suggestions. I try to have friendly conversations with other people, but I think most people already have the idea that I'm crazy. Although there are a few people who are friendly to me. I try to have conversations with these people whenever I can.

 

Start smiling to people you meet. That's what I did. I am a very quiet girl and I always frown. People get scared of me because of that. So I changed the way I am. Though I don't always smile like when I was a little girl. I was sweet and charming...as what my mom described me...but I am not what i was then. I am bitter and rude. So people get scared of me. I didn't want it that way..so I changed...I started talking to people...smiling at whoever I meet...smile...as in --> . Don't smile like you want to eat them or something...

 

When I was younger, I always smiled. People in school used to make comments about how I never stopped smiling, and they all said that they never saw me frown. Last year, people were telling me how I always looked so depressed. People told me that I should smile more. Lots of people started to worry about me, especially when I started writing poems about death, loneliness, and suicide. I never considered committing suicide, but I certainly wasn't very happy and never thought of life as a good thing.

 

This year, I've tried smiling more. I think I appear to be a happier person than I was last year, and I suppose that I am a happier person. The main reason is that I now have a best friend to talk to. She makes life seem a lot less lonely for me, but I will probably have to say goodbye to her in a few weeks. School is ending, and we might never see each other again. She told me that we can still be friends after school is over, but I'm not sure how.

[alice]

The girl is very popular, and she has lots of friends. Why would she risk losing some of her friends just to go on a date with someone like me? She is such a great person, that she could probably go on a date with any guy she wants to. I really can't blame her for not wanting to go on a date with me. She knows I'm a nice guy, but why would she choose me if she could be with someone who is considered to be more "normal"?

 

She really is out of your league.

 

She told me that we can still be friends after school is over, but I'm not sure how.

 

You should hang out with her.

 

If she is the popular girl that you say she is...then ask her for tips on how to change the way you are. To change the way you look or the way people look at you. I don't know...

 

You mentioned that people worried about you...aren't they what you call friends?

[husmusen]

Yes these are friends.

And there concerns stem from what are called 'bonds'.

 

We form these bonds by the process of caring for one another.

And yet they are in some way seperate from that process.

 

Herme3 has people who care about him, this is a good thing.

But it is possible to have people who care about you and to still feel alone.

To feel that there is no one who understands you.

 

I think this may be how Herme feels.

 

Regards,

Husmusen

[mike90]

Yes that seems to be it, and that i can certainly understand. I have plenty of people that care about me to some extent or other, but only a couple that really understand me. Its tough, but your not going to get that if you dont learn to get out and interact more. Generally, unles your a hot female anyway, heaps of attention arent going to just come your way for no reason. You got to work at it .

[Klaynos]

Seriously' date=' though. Start small. Start with the way you look. [/quote']

 

People cry and run away when I smile...

 

But herme3 I know where you're coming from, and this realy is great advice

 

The girl is very popular' date=' and she has lots of friends. Why would she risk losing some of her friends just to go on a date with someone like me? [/quote']

 

I hate this culture and attitude, seems (damn media for not letting me have a fari assessment) that is is endemic in us schools :'(

[herme3]

She really is out of your league.

 

What exactly do you mean by that?

 

You mentioned that people worried about you...aren't they what you call friends?

 

No, they are the people who anonymously go to the guidance counselor and say that I need help. The only person who actually talked to me about my poems was my best friend. I think she said something like, "Life is too short to be lonely."

[alice]

What I meant about her being out of your league is the fact that she is popular and your not...well in a way, you are popular...people know you...you're the crazy dude/mad scientist.

 

She is out of your league because of your social status. It's just impossible for a popular girl to date some loser. But that's just in the movies.

[alice]

Your depression has gone to the guidance office? Wow...it really is serious. I guess those so called "friends" of yours are just big tattle tails. Or maybe they really are concerned about you...but they don't know what to do to help you but to tell the guidance councilor.

 

So anyway...I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say to help you get over your loneliness. She is the only person who makes you complete, right? Then stick with her...stay friends with her...the fact that she told you you'd still be friends after school is over is a sign that she values you...and that she wants to be your friend...so do something about it! A simple visit to her house is good. Say...uhm...I don't know..."Want to watch a movie?" or just hang out...just that...make it clear that it is not a date...it's just HANGING OUT. Nothing more.

 

Good luck!

[GutZ]

Errr, this is like me 5 years ago, and still slightly now.

 

For the past 4 years I've had one friend. In high-school I was the crazy one. I use to hear stories of my childhood from my mother, I was the happiest kid ever. When I was 12 I become the opposite, and it got worse. Depression, G.A.D, S.A.D, and recently I think some OCD (It takes me an hour to leave my apt and sleep because I check my taps/oven/doors 20 times every night), maybe bi-polar. I don't know if genetics help but if it my family line is like....

 

I don't know if you read any of my posts but when I was blunt I was being seriously real with you.

 

I don't know how old you are but I am 22 and I am just starting to change things around. It pisses me off to see people like this, including myself.

 

You know exactly what needs to be done, you can rationalize just as I had too. Your loneliness doesn't lie in that fact of lack of friends or people. You need people to take away the fact that you have a void, that is your loneliness.

 

Don't change who you are for someone else, thats...well...

 

I could go on, like others have done for me, but ultimate I had to find out the hard way, it can get even harder. It's ultimately a choice. It might be the difference between a flat path and a mountain but thats life for some people.

 

yeah ok I am done lecturing pointlessly.

[KFC]

Just wondering herme3,

When did you first ask a girl out?

 

You do not have to answer.

[chemi]

Originally Posted by Herme3

That is completely against my goal in life. My goal is to find the perfect person, and never breakup with her.

 

That's actually quite dangerous...say if you do find the perfect person (and she's available too), how do you know if she will see you as the perfect one for her as well? You might end up getting hurt even if you do find the perfect one.

 

Either way, there's risk involved:

 

1) no dating - you think you are not emotionally hurt, but everytime you get to know a person and realizes that this is THE girl with THE perfect personality for you, but sadly, she's going out with some other guy. (tell me you don't feel any pain?)

 

2) friendship --> perfect one - finally after 5 years of buddying, you think the girl's perfect for you, and you think she feels the same way...until you two start dating (to me, dating is just friendship with physical intimacy) --> a) everything works out...great! you live happily ever after. b) one of you guys doesn't feel the other one's "perfect" anymore...one of you can get hurt.

 

3) dating --> like you said, could lead to disaster, but can also lead to lifetime happiness

 

Basically, you can never get rid of the possibility of getting hurt or being hurt emotionally.

(it's not just dating, e.g. workplace, school, getting into a fight at the supermarket...etc.)

 

(I haven't finished reading all 271 posts, so if anything is redundant...then it's redundant)

[alice]

Just wondering herme3' date='

When did you first ask a girl out?

 

You do not have to answer.[/quote']

 

I think it's his first time.

[sabbath]

ah...this thread has become a bit frustrating...why are we still here?

 

First off, there should be no question whatsoever about whether this girl is out of herme3's league or not, or that whether he should change for anybody.

 

Many of us have been saying it over and over again. Herme3 must change because he wants to and according to how he wants to become, not somebody else's design for a "normal" and "cool" guy.

 

Personally, I find average joes very trivial. There's nothing interesting about people who will risk to lose their individuality so they will look like the rest, which often is depicted as being mean to "losers" and the unpopular crowd. Who wants to be like that? I think its pretty stupid to judge people how cool they are by their lip gloss or their hair perm. Hello? That's retarded.

 

In school I've never let other people bully me. The only people who get bullied are those who permit it. I fight (not literally), I show them I'm strong and that no matter what they do, they'll never be cool to me if they just copied it off somebody else.

 

As for writing about death, suicide, darkness..I've been there, and actually I still find it hard to write about happy and light things. The fact that I've been writing about them, and trying to solidify the thoughts in my head has helped me cope with the turmoil and loneliness inside me.

 

People think that's alarming. For me, it's just expression, and it helps. At least we're being honest to ourselves about how we're really feeling. We have no need for fear because we know our affliction, fear is the offspring of the unknown.

 

It is so painful to have friends who don't understand you, maybe equally painful to having no friends and being misunderstood. I expected my friends to understand me, but they did not. It seemed to me that I had left them behind, so far behind and that I had grown up too fast. What they thought were important had become commonplace and childish to me.

 

It's hard to feel like that, when nobody can understand your principles and point of view. But if you want to be a person of dignity and strong character, you have to stand by them no matter what. But what it really is in the end, is personal choice. You will eventually have to choose to blend, or to stand out.

 

I chose to have friends and to be me. So what I did was I did not ask them to understand me, I tried to understand them. I chose to bridge the gap, I started the conversation going again. I shared to them how I felt instead of heading off to my gloom corner and sulking in my eternal darkness. I shared to them so that they could have a picture of how and what was going on inside me. Somehow, the burden isn't that heavy anymore, and light has begun to pour out of the shadows...and I can even say now, that I am almost merry.

 

But let me point out too that just because you're having friends doesn't mean you're trying to be average already. You can have friends and still be you. I think that's when you'll discover who your real friends are. If they accept that you are like that without condoning your mistakes, then you have found a real friend.

 

As to her being reluctant to show that you are friends in front of her clique or circle..that is understandable. She must probably be a regular adolescent. This however, reveals to us what her character is. She is still conscious of what other people think (and I think this must mean she does not have the confidence others might think she has). She is after all undergoing the "ravaging storms of adolescence" and all that melodrama, too. We also see that she is not perfect, and I don't think herme3 expects her to be.

 

Herme3 if you still like her despite this, then maybe you're blind or you genuinely have accepted her for who she is. You decide.

 

What she told you by the way is true, you still can be friends even if you'll not be going to the same school anymore, or if you're parting ways. To keep the communication open must be a personal effort. We don't have email for nothing. Cellular phones are there, telephones, mirc, chat...the whole of Communications Technology is on your side, no problem. I think it will even be easier for you because peer pressure will not be as daunting a force as it once was while at school.

 

It is good to hear that you are happier now. My mom always tells me that if you look beyond yourself and live for the betterment of others, happiness is far more easier to reach. I do not know if that is true, maybe so. But I also believe that personal happiness is important. Search for what makes you happy, smile or laugh. When I play with my dog's puppies, I am happy. When I look out my window and see the leaves gently sway with the breeze, I cry, but I am happy.

 

Happiness is relative. Find yours. And don't ever let others dictate you on your search for that happiness.

 

But remember that these too, shall pass...

 

Even happiness will turn to gloom. And gloom back to happiness.

 

Just remember that everything passes...everything does, like the wind, like time, like age.

 

If you keep that in mind, I think more or less, you'll survive.

 

The best as always!