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Posted

Depression sucks, how do you deal with it? I heard there isn't really anyway to change your natural chemical balances (or imbalances), obviously there are drugs (legal and illegal), but they all have crappy side effects.

 

I myself have a significant case of depression, that i simply wish would go away. I realize that there is no reason for my depression, but it doesn't change the way i feel. Maybe i'm some form of bipolar, because i have been known to be unusually happy on certain occasions, this is fairly rare though. Most of the time i'm not that depressed, but i am definately in deep depression more days than i feel good. If i want i can usually hide my depression by being completely emotionless and energyless--- but that usually bites me in the butt with deeper depression later.

 

Like i said this really sucks, i dont WANT to be depressed, it really gets in the way of my social life and the way i communicate with people. I don't have enough happy days to to make up for the damagage i do to myself when i'm depressed.

 

So just wondering, is there any way to deal with depression?

---- oh and dont worry i dont need urgent replies, i'm not sucidal at the moment, just trying to find answers.

Posted

One of the best ways to deal with depression is to stay active both mentally and physically. All of us go through stages of depression in our lives, some more severe than others. The trick is to not over think things. If you think your depressed you will get depressed more easily. However if you stay active by pursuing some form of mental exercise, either studying or writing, you will have less time to be depressed as such emotions are generally prevalant when you are inactive. Physical exercise can also make a marked improvement in your general well being, both mental and physical, as it produces endorphins which can make you feel mildly euphoric. Thus the phrase, healthy body, healthy mind.

 

Also trying to assess which aspects of your life are particularly prone to trigger bouts of depression cannot be undervalued. If you know what it is that tends to set your depression off then you can either avoid such situations in future or formulate a series of mechanisms to deal with the situation next time it arises.

 

Often depression is considered by many, including the sufferer, to be in the 'too hard' basket. However as a former sufferer, it is this hopelessness that is often at the seat of the problem and once you become more active you will find that things you previously saw as insurrmountable, are merely a matter of perception.

 

Keep active and remember that no matter how bad things get, there is always people worse off than you.

Posted

I've been going through pretty bad depression lately. I'm on medicine to counteract it. Even with the medicine it gets pretty bad every now and then. I barely sleep and sometimes I can't even eat very much. So on top of theses emotions I'm incredibly tired all day.

 

I do agree with Thales. Keeping active is key. Whenever I'm really down I find someone to talk to. Or, better yet, I talk to someone and play soccer. Two things to take my mind off the feelings. That's the key, always try to keep your mind engaged. Do something you really like to do when the depression gets hard. A puzzle, a game, sports, something. I know sometimes it's hard though to even do anything when you feel like that, no matter how much you like it. Just push yourself to do something you enjoy. And it may not take your mind off the depression completely, but it will at least make you feel a little better.

 

I also do meditation and relaxation techniques. It does help. Just think positive thoughts and let yourself relax. Relax your mind and body when you do this and it will help.

 

Just keep thinking positive. I know what you're going through, and I know it can be hard at times. But just try to look on the bright side of things, no matter how dark they may seem.

Posted

NavajoEverclear:

 

Embrace existentialism :)

 

I heard there isn't really anyway to change your natural chemical balances (or imbalances), obviously there are drugs (legal and illegal), but they all have crappy side effects.

 

Depends on what you mean by "change". Medications will alter the way your brain processes certain neurotransmitters, but not on a permanent basis.

 

Maybe i'm some form of bipolar, because i have been known to be unusually happy on certain occasions, this is fairly rare though.

 

Bipolars go through a cycle of depression and elation. Being mostly depressed but sometimes happy doesn't really fit the description.

 

Besides the advice given (all good), it might also help you to keep a mental diary of when you're depressed and when you're not. Is there anything that triggers a deeper state of depression, and what changes on the occasions that you're happy?

 

According to your profile you're seventeen. I don't know exactly what your situation is, but I felt much the same way at seventeen, and most everyone I know well felt about that way at about that age. For whatever reason that is. Your depression may well pass.

 

Mine hasn't. At twenty I am a good deal happier and more secure than I was at seventeen, but I still have long periods of pessimism and gloom. They are not crippling, but I suspect (from talking to others older than I am) that such feelings remain with one all one's life.

 

Analyzing them will help you control them, and physical exercize will help you suppress them. The brain creates its own antidepressents in the form of endorphins.

Posted

Thanks for your advice, i have noticed that if i'm in some activity that my mood picks up. There are times when i just don't feel like doing anything, so that could be a problem, but i'll keep your advice in mind and work with it. Thanks very much.

And i wish i could identify a trigger, but i dont think there is ones. Some days i just wake up feeling really crappy about myself, and occasionaly i wake up feeling unusually energetic and social. Sometimes it changes in the middle of the day.

 

Anyhow, keeping active is very good advice, should have figured that out myself but thanks for your help

Posted

Not a problem Navajo, glad to be of assistance. What Wotanaz said about age is true too. Not to belittle your problem but often at that age, particularly if you are intellectually gifted, it is easy to get frustrated with your lack of a voice in the world, which seems to be trundling ever faster towards...well lets not go there.

 

And if worse comes to worse you know you've got us guys here who will give you an objective assessment(i hope) of the way of the world. Having someone you can trust and confide in is usually the best way to deal with any problems, particulatly emotional ones. Talking about things, putting your thoughts into words can sometimes make you realise things that in retrospect seem obvious. Sometimes you just need to heard it said, so don't refrain from expressing your grief/disbelief if it helps you feel better.

 

As for a trigger, it most likely won't be obvious, if it were you would have dealt with it long ago. My trigger was that I took onboard everyone else's problems and their opinion of me too heavily. I was quite over sensitive to what other people were doing/saying. In learning to deal with that part of my personality I have become a more well rounded and confident person. I also found that having faith in others intentions(not always presuming them to be bad) helped. Sometimes when your depressed its very easy to paint a bleak picture on other peoples take on the world also. However thats destructive as opposed to constructive.

 

Last but not least, think global but act local. There is no point in worrying about things you can't change, and if you feel you are uneasy with something fundamental in your world, let it be your goal to place yourself in a position where you can change it.

Posted

I agree with post #2

 

mental and physical excersize is a great way to help combat depression, lots of fresh air helps too. it`s not a cure, but it can help a little :)

Posted

depression is inside the head, if you KNOW you are not depressed you wont be, normaly the key to knowing and remembering this is by taking your mind off things... play a game, talk to someone, chose a thread on this site and become a Dr in the subject by researching it.... do anything, just dont sit round doing nothing thinking, coz in the end your gonna think something which you dont wanna think and that will make you depressed again.

Posted

The main thing is learning to drop it. I agree with Thales that when other people have problems it sometimes seems easier to help them than to say no. You haven't the mental energy to argue. Then you feel even more tired. Your problems seem worse. You can't deal with them so they just fester and you feel worse for not deailing with it. The people that come to you with problems and tell everyone else that they are busy when they need help are usualy well balanced. That thing you do sometimes when you just shut off and do as your told is no good. You have to say no and remember the consiquences of that are better than the alternative. If you have a problem that makes you down drop it and go do something else for 10 minutes. Exercise is great and you could maybe tie this in with other things. You could try helping someone that has a genuine need when you feel like it. This will make you get up and do something and help your self esteem and when someone asks you for help and you don't want to, you can say no I already helped the old guy across the road clear his garden I've done enough. If you want to laugh do it, if you want to cry do it, if you want to screem at the world and call everybody on the planet a set of f*****g w*****rs do it in private BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DON'T!. Do something nice for your self every day I say your worth it even if you don't and the people that don't are just jealous because you have something they want. Do something you enjoy every day. I come in here to play, the universe is a strange and wonderfull place. What do you love to do?.

Posted

There were lots of times I thought I wouldn't be. A lot of my problems were bouts of "situational depression" - I had plenty of reasons to be sad - financial problems, marital problems, kid problems. There were plenty of times over the years that I thought life wasn't worth living, and I'd rather be dead than put up with all the crap I was enduring. Then, things got better for me, and I was glad I stuck it out. Then, I woke up one morning, and my husband was dead in bed beside me. We had been married for 31 years. I realized that all the crap he had been worried about that didn't really matter worth a tinker's damn in the long haul were what killed him. I realized that all the crap I nagged him about didn't make a toot in the long run either.

 

I realized that dead is dead - whether you believe in the afterworld or not, you sure don't have another shot at this life.

 

I realized that you better make the most of what you've got. If you need help to talk things through, or medication to help get straight, get it.

 

What helps me most is to walk. I drag my sorry butt out of the bed and walk three miles every morning. I live on the coast, and I can walk to a place where I can watch the sun rise. I spend the time mulling over my problems and deciding on ways to solve them.

 

I know I've got a lot of years on you.... I don't mean to preach. I remember when I was your age, my mom used to tell me, "you think you have it so bad, you get to ride to school on the school bus - I had to walk 5 miles to school in the snow."

 

It turns out all my friends got the same lines. There must not have been a house located within 5 miles of school anywhere, and it must have snowed a hell of a lot more back then than it does now.

 

Anyway - I'm not trying to preach - I'm trying to tell you that things can be better, and they will be better, eventually, and it really is worth it to do everything you can to help yourself feel happier.

Posted
I realized that dead is dead - whether you believe in the afterworld or not' date=' you sure don't have another shot at this life.

.[/quote']

 

thats a very important thing to realize, i decided a while ago that suicide wasn't an option. I mean what you want (what i wanted it to be, during a time i was seriously thinking about it) suicide to be, is the ultimate action that will make people start noticing you and start caring.--- but if you're dead you cant reap any of those benefits, and i've got enough things in life that keep me hopeful, and many good friends that i want to stick around for.

 

I still cant identify the exact trigger, but i realized that usually not noticing, i'm constantly placing no value on myself, and putting everyone else up on a pedestal, assuming they are so special because of something i wont be about to understand. ---- thats the way i see people before i know them. Then as i get to know them i hear about their problems i never knew they had and find out their not that dissimilar from me. Besides activities to keep active, i need to make a deliberate effort to stop looking at the world like that, cause i haven't realized how much this seperates me from everyone else, when i think i'm not trying and its just happening. Its actually kind of dissapointing to be disillusioned, but at the same time very refreshing.

Posted

adding on to that;

 

remembering that there are people who care for you and would be upset to see you die can make you feel cared for and less depressed.

indeed, if you are thinking of suicide, think of all those who would miss you, feel sorry for you..... you dont want to inflict that pain on others, live for them.

Posted

in a way, but people on that path normally dont worry about it, they feel left out and depressed, as though people are being selfish in regards for themselves. it is a crude way of looking at it, true, but a bit crude.

Posted

NavahoEverclear:

I still cant identify the exact trigger, but i realized that usually not noticing, i'm constantly placing no value on myself, and putting everyone else up on a pedestal, assuming they are so special because of something i wont be about to understand.

 

I doubt there's any 'exact' trigger.

 

Again, that's not a rare way to feel. When you're seventeen, you don't have as much perspective on people as you do when you're older. I would think - well I had the idea that everyone but me spent thursday through sunday partying, then the rest of the week was spent enjoying themselves with friends between classes. Nobody else was depressed ever and everyone but me had the most perfect family and boyfriend (girlfriend). Above all, nobody else could possibly identify with me or my interests.

 

Didn't help that my school was full of "trendy" people who definitely tried to convey that image, and very few of them could possibly identify with me or my interests.

 

Watching people up close will help. You realize that they have their own problems and uglinesses, and you stop comparing yourself to them in such an unhealthy way.

 

Thales:

All actions, even the "altruistic" ones, are based on selfishness.

Posted
I doubt there's any 'exact' trigger.
i'd agree with you there, it is a combination of many things.

 

Watching people up close will help. You realize that they have their own problems and uglinesses, and you stop comparing yourself to them in such an unhealthy way.
obviously, everyone has problems, thats what this thread is about, depression, a common problem. it is human nature to compare things, although you dont have to you can not compare yourself to others, but it is - on the whole, a natural thing to do. but it is good advice, to those depressed, dont compare yourself to others, or at least if you do, compare yourself to those worst off, think of the people starving in africa, or the russian kids kept hostage in that seige, there are always people worst off than you, sure there will also be people better of than you, but ignore them... to solve depression you must make yourself look and feel good and better about yourself.

 

Thales:

All actions' date=' even the "altruistic" ones, are based on selfishness.[/quote'] thats not true, you often here of selfless acts, such as saving a life at the risk of your own, thats selfless and is also an action, therefore that quote isnt technically right.

Posted
I still cant identify the exact trigger, but i realized that usually not noticing, i'm constantly placing no value on myself, and putting everyone else up on a pedestal, assuming they are so special because of something i wont be about to understand. ---- thats the way i see people before i know them. Then as i get to know them i hear about their problems i never knew they had and find out their not that dissimilar from me.

 

On the other hand, I used to think that other people were looking at me and seeing nothing but warts and pimples.

 

I, like you, used to think everything went right for everyone else, and it only went wrong for me. In a way, that is a selfish way of thinking. Like the song we used to sing when I was a kid, "nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm going out and eat worms."

 

That kind of thinking deals with the assumption that everyone else is focusing on you, seeing and criticizing your shortcomings. Fact is, if they notice you at all, they don't see anything beyond the superficial layer.

 

The expression on your face is mirrored back at you. If you are like I was, you probably walk around with your head down, looking at your feet. If you make eye contact with someone, do you have a "hangdog expression"?

 

For a week, try walking around with your head up. Make eye contact with the people you meet and smile. Tell them "good morning", "good afternoon", or "Hi, how ya doin'?" I will bet that more than 50% of the folks will smile back at you - and when they do, it will make you feel better.

Posted

 

I' date=' like you, used to think everything went right for everyone else, and it only went wrong for me. In a way, that is a selfish way of thinking. Like the song we used to sing when I was a kid, "nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm going out and eat worms."

 

...[/quote']

 

you are in tidewater virginia

 

my girl cousins were from blacksburg, and my mother from bedford (more up in hills)

 

they would say the same thing but specify that they would do it in the garden, they would almost sing it in a kind of wail:

"no body likes me, every body hates me, I'm going out in the garden...

and EAT WORMS!!!"

 

when a teenage is depressed someone should check what the issues are with the Dad.

dads high expectations of intelligent offspring, and possible disapproval, can be immobilizing.

 

chemicals for bipolarity can be wonderful,

but sometimes it would help to give happy pills to the daddy and then

the son or daughter would get along all right as is

Posted
Suicide is selfish.

that aside, when you`re dead, how can you POSSIBLY hope to solve your problems, or at least be around to see the outcome?

 

what`s the worst that can happen? something kills you? well you were going to do that anyway! :)

 

Hang in there :))

Posted

For the reasons I mentioned in my last post i decided against suicide a while ago, so dont worry.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wotanaz

Thales:

All actions, even the "altruistic" ones, are based on selfishness.

 

thats not true, you often here of selfless acts, such as saving a life at the risk of your own, thats selfless and is also an action, therefore that quote isnt technically right.

 

I'm not sure myself if there is such thing as an unselfish action. Depending on the maturity of your thought process, you may no longer care for your own rewards, but in all the time and paths leading up to that were surely covered by actions for the benefit of yourself. Its just instinct, theres nothing wrong with that. There are many actions that are good for yourself and others. Infact i think it can be selfish to put too much emphasis on trying to be unselfish. I'm not sure how to explain why i say that, but i'm sure some of you understand what i mean

 

If you are like I was, you probably walk around with your head down, looking at your feet. If you make eye contact with someone, do you have a "hangdog expression"?

 

Well i haven't been like that in a long time, i actually do have quite a few friends, i just do a very good job of hiding my depression. ---- i'm getting tired of talking about my own depression now that i see its pretty much a universal thing.

Posted

When does this book come out? I want to read it. But are you trying to take God out of all this? Damn you. Brahm is everywhere. An evolving universe is neat' date=' but it doesn't proove athiesim, you effing weasel whore

 

__________________

oh such Tacos will I give.[/quote']

 

This was a classic post. they rarely achieve this quality no matter whose they are.

 

Another one-woman uprising by Everclear, back in May, prompted Sayonara to appear and say

 

"Everything is normal. Go back to your homes."

 

-------------------------

Everclear tends to see the essentials and also on occasion to write or provoke classic posts. the everclear identity and voice must be maintained

Posted

good idea, so lets move on without totaly changing the subject:

 

I'm not sure myself if there is such thing as an unselfish action. Depending on the maturity of your thought process' date=' you may no longer care for your own rewards, but in all the time and paths leading up to that were surely covered by actions for the benefit of yourself. Its just instinct, theres nothing wrong with that. There are many actions that are good for yourself and others. Infact i think it can be selfish to put too much emphasis on trying to be unselfish. I'm not sure how to explain why i say that, but i'm sure some of you understand what i mean

[/quote']

firstly, i do get what you are saying, selfless acts are normally carried out for yourself, like doing something brave can get you a medal [in the army].

however i think that, doing a seemingly selfless act [such as above] is not done for the medal, but done as a spare of the moment... in the hope of saving the other guys on your side... and killing the enemy, resulting in your side winning.

if you did this, and then looked back at it, one could say that they did it for the medal, but when you are in a battle field, you dont think of medals, only yourself and your friends around you.... and that in itself is not selfish.

[this is only 1 example]

Posted
depression is inside the head, if you KNOW you are not depressed you wont be, normaly the key to knowing and remembering this is by taking your mind off things... play a game, talk to someone, chose a thread on this site and become a Dr in the subject by researching it.... do anything, just dont sit round doing nothing thinking, coz in the end your gonna think something which you dont wanna think and that will make you depressed again.

 

This is a common misconception surrounding depression. Depression is not when you in a bit of a bad mood. You cannot tell a sufferer to 'snap out of it' it doesn’t work that way. Depression is sometimes likened to cancer: -

 

Cancer can be fatal. So can depression.

Cancer will not go away if you ignore it. Nether will depression.

Cancer needs treatment or it will spread. So will depression.

Anyone can suffer from cancer. Anyone can suffer from depression.

 

Clinical depression is a very serious problem for someone to suffer from. It’s severely underestimated by most people, due to the lack of physical symptoms and confusion with ‘being a bit sad’. If you don’t understand depression, there is very little you can do to help a sufferer. You will most probably just worsen the situation. You can offer support, and not advice.

 

Suicide is selfish.

 

Ah. Sometimes, probably it is. Other times it’s the only option open. People don’t like to discuss suicide, as if breaching the subject might push people over the edge. In reality if someone is feeling suicidal and no one discusses it, the person become isolated. People tend to attach a stigma to talking about suicidal feelings, or view it as to heavy a conversation. If people were more open in discussing it, people with suicidal thoughts would not feel so isolated and alone at the one point where they need support.

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