Australian Federal Election.

[JohnB]

Well, it looks like we are heading for the first hung Parliment since WW 2. We probably won't have a result for a week or so.

 

Projecting forward with circa 71% of the votes counted it looks like this.

 

Labor: 70 seats, down from 83. (Our "Left" wing party)

Coallition: 72 seats up from 60 (Liberal and National Parties, our "Right" wing)

Green: 1 (Their first seat in the Lower House.)

Independent: 4 (And quite smart cookies, these 4)

 

Since the single Green will side with Labor it all comes down to the Independents in the Lower House.

 

Things could change as these are projections and the postal vote is yet to come in. The Australian Electoral Commission has 27 seats currently listed as "Undecided".

 

No matter who wins in the Lower House the "balance of power" goes to the Greens in the Senate. This will make government interesting because whoever forms gov in the Lower House is not going to want to institute a major tax on CO2 because that will blow out costs and electricity bills around the country. When all it takes is a couple of Independents to change their minds, rampant inflation is not a good look for a gov.

 

The Greens however, want a large tax on CO2 and will try to use their influence to get it instituted. "Give us the carbon tax we want, or we won't support your other policies"

 

All in all, it looks like it's going to be interesting.

 

My prediction is that whoever forms the gov will do their best but will eventually describe working with the Greens as "impossible" and we will have another election in 12-18 months. I say that because our "Greens" are ecofreaks with little to no logical capacity. They want a 40% reduction of CO2 compared to 1990 levels by 2020, which some might call a laudable goal, but they are opposed to "clean" coal (if it ever happens), nuclear and hydro power. They are also concerned about the "visual pollution" of windfarms and the possible degradation of sea grass areas that might be used for tidal or wave power. And there is the very long running campaign against sand mining, so exactly how we are supposed to generate electricity I have no idea and they aren't saying.

 

On a lighter note.

 

The Communist Alliance are feeling pleased with their highest vote count in decades, 486 votes nationally. The Socialist Alliance did much better with 7,732 votes, which shows that people really do prefer Socialism over Communism. Although both were eclipsed by the Socialist Equality Partys 8,900 votes.

 

The Australian Sex Party polled 8,707 votes. I'm not sure what that means, but I hope that it isn't "More Australians prefer Socialist Equality to Sex" or we're in big trouble.

 

Demonstrating the major influence that religion plays in Australian politics, the CDP Christian Party trounced the Secular Party by a resounding 69,465 votes to 10,209. Or if you prefer percentages, by.67% of the vote to .10%. A resounding victory for our religious right. Well done. God is truly smiling on you. Now go away and let him smile on you somewhere else.

 

Finally, and showing what well organised sceptics can do, the "Climate Sceptics Party" managed 3,447 votes illustrating that with the obvious backing of the huge "Big Oil funding and propaganda machine" they have managed to have more impact than the "Non-Custodial Parents Party" (2,439), the "Carers Alliance" (1,176), the "Building Australia Party" (1,252) and the "Australia First Party (NSW) Incorporated" (3,092). Given the expected increase in funding from right wing think tanks, the Sceptics believe that they will able to mount a credible challenge to the Socialist Alliance numbers by 2050.

 

In a note of irony. The "What Women Want Party" didn't tell anybody what their policies were. They apparently didn't stand any candidates either, so the population of Australia is still in the dark as to what the women wanted anyway.

 

I love Australian politics. Do other countries have this much fun?

[Pangloss]

Thanks for taking the time with that. It was an interesting read.

[JohnB]

Update.

 

Australia now has a government!

 

For the last few weeks we've had a hung Parliment. Now with the help of those now known as "The Gang of Three" Julia Gillard is the Prime Minister and the Labor Party are still in government. The Gang of Three are simply 3 independent politicians who had to decide which side to back as a minority gov, nothing bad is meant by the name, but there are three of them, so what else could we call them?

 

This may turn out well as there are a number of Parlimentary procedures that p*ss off the public and Independents alike that will soon be changed. The Greens have shown their predominantly red color by siding immediately with Labor, not even making a pretence of considering their decision. Given the policies of the Oz Greens concerning the bush and primary producers things could get ugly.

 

Sorry Canada et al. The big mining tax is dead in the water and we'll be keeping those billions of investment dollars and thousands of jobs. One of the three is from a mining area and he ain't voting for it. (Another thing to p*ss off the Greens, btw)

 

Also gone is any idea of Cap and Trade or a CO2 tax of any kind. Big Al Gore can fly his jet around as much as he likes, but it's no go down here.

 

As a point, a number of candidates were his apostles and used it in campaigning that they have been to the US and personally trained to be part of his little army. They were smashed in the polls. We have a great dislike of American politicians trying to put their ideological patsies into our Parliment.

 

Here's the drum America, keep your f*cking fifth column at home, we don't want it.

 

On the lighter side. Since the election was called the government has been in "caretaker" mode. This means that no new policies or major law reforms could be debated or passed. So what has been the result after a couple of months of neither political party being able to "improve" Australia?

 

Interest rates: Stable

Unemployment: Down slightly.

Inflation: Down

Petrol Price: Down from $1.32/lire to $1.15/litre

Industrial Disputes: Down

Crime: Stable to Down

 

These figures demonstrate quite clearly the need for Australia to have a fully functioning gov as quickly as possible to........um...............*scratchs head*, stuff things up again?

 

And from the "I bet you didn't expect that" side of politics. Considering how conservatives are generally painted as the more racist, ageist, whateverist side of politics there are two more "first" in this new Parliment. The youngest ever Member of Parliment is Wyatt Roy, aged 20 and a Conservative and the first ever Aboriginal Member of the Lower House is Ken Wyatt, also a Conservative. They join that other "first" Senator Neville Bonner who was the first Aboriginal Senator in Australia over 30 years ago. (and a Conservative) (Also a really nice person, I met him a few times during the Fraser gov.)

[Pangloss]

Rofl! Yeah maybe we should try that, just throw all the rascals out for a while and see what happens. (lol)

[ParanoiA]

As a point, a number of candidates were his apostles and used it in campaigning that they have been to the US and personally trained to be part of his little army. They were smashed in the polls. We have a great dislike of American politicians trying to put their ideological patsies into our Parliment.

 

Here's the drum America, keep your f*cking fifth column at home, we don't want it.

 

Sweet. If only we would listen...

 

 

On the lighter side. Since the election was called the government has been in "caretaker" mode. This means that no new policies or major law reforms could be debated or passed. So what has been the result after a couple of months of neither political party being able to "improve" Australia?

 

Interest rates: Stable

Unemployment: Down slightly.

Inflation: Down

Petrol Price: Down from $1.32/lire to $1.15/litre

Industrial Disputes: Down

Crime: Stable to Down

 

These figures demonstrate quite clearly the need for Australia to have a fully functioning gov as quickly as possible to........um...............*scratchs head*, stuff things up again?

 

That's so awesome. I wish I could turn that whole bit into a signature.

 

Seriously though, I've been enjoying your thread here. Thanks.

[Dan6541]

I'm just happy Tony Abbott didn't get in, that bogan.

 

Also thankful those independants are finished with their obvious glee at being in the spotlight.

 

You obviously hate the Greens as a party, what do you think about Bob Brown?

Edited September 11, 2010 by Dan6541

[rigney]

Well, it looks like we are heading for the first hung Parliment since WW 2. We probably won't have a result for a week or so.

 

Projecting forward with circa 71% of the votes counted it looks like this.

 

Labor: 70 seats, down from 83. (Our "Left" wing party)

Coallition: 72 seats up from 60 (Liberal and National Parties, our "Right" wing)

Green: 1 (Their first seat in the Lower House.)

Independent: 4 (And quite smart cookies, these 4)

 

Since the single Green will side with Labor it all comes down to the Independents in the Lower House.

 

Things could change as these are projections and the postal vote is yet to come in. The Australian Electoral Commission has 27 seats currently listed as "Undecided".

 

No matter who wins in the Lower House the "balance of power" goes to the Greens in the Senate. This will make government interesting because whoever forms gov in the Lower House is not going to want to institute a major tax on CO2 because that will blow out costs and electricity bills around the country. When all it takes is a couple of Independents to change their minds, rampant inflation is not a good look for a gov.

 

The Greens however, want a large tax on CO2 and will try to use their influence to get it instituted. "Give us the carbon tax we want, or we won't support your other policies"

 

All in all, it looks like it's going to be interesting.

 

My prediction is that whoever forms the gov will do their best but will eventually describe working with the Greens as "impossible" and we will have another election in 12-18 months. I say that because our "Greens" are ecofreaks with little to no logical capacity. They want a 40% reduction of CO2 compared to 1990 levels by 2020, which some might call a laudable goal, but they are opposed to "clean" coal (if it ever happens), nuclear and hydro power. They are also concerned about the "visual pollution" of windfarms and the possible degradation of sea grass areas that might be used for tidal or wave power. And there is the very long running campaign against sand mining, so exactly how we are supposed to generate electricity I have no idea and they aren't saying.

 

On a lighter note.

 

The Communist Alliance are feeling pleased with their highest vote count in decades, 486 votes nationally. The Socialist Alliance did much better with 7,732 votes, which shows that people really do prefer Socialism over Communism. Although both were eclipsed by the Socialist Equality Partys 8,900 votes.

 

The Australian Sex Party polled 8,707 votes. I'm not sure what that means, but I hope that it isn't "More Australians prefer Socialist Equality to Sex" or we're in big trouble.

 

Demonstrating the major influence that religion plays in Australian politics, the CDP Christian Party trounced the Secular Party by a resounding 69,465 votes to 10,209. Or if you prefer percentages, by.67% of the vote to .10%. A resounding victory for our religious right. Well done. God is truly smiling on you. Now go away and let him smile on you somewhere else.

 

Finally, and showing what well organised sceptics can do, the "Climate Sceptics Party" managed 3,447 votes illustrating that with the obvious backing of the huge "Big Oil funding and propaganda machine" they have managed to have more impact than the "Non-Custodial Parents Party" (2,439), the "Carers Alliance" (1,176), the "Building Australia Party" (1,252) and the "Australia First Party (NSW) Incorporated" (3,092). Given the expected increase in funding from right wing think tanks, the Sceptics believe that they will able to mount a credible challenge to the Socialist Alliance numbers by 2050.

 

In a note of irony. The "What Women Want Party" didn't tell anybody what their policies were. They apparently didn't stand any candidates either, so the population of Australia is still in the dark as to what the women wanted anyway.

 

I love Australian politics. Do other countries have this much fun?

 

All I want to know is, have you been importing a bunch of North American crazies?

[JohnB]

Rigney, we don't need to import your crazies, we have some very good ones of our own.

 

Dan, I don't hate the Greens, I just think that they're a bunch of people who are so far out of touch that they couldn't find reality with a Ouija board and a Star Chart.

 

A 40% reduction of CO2 on 1990 levels by 2020 is a great sounding policy. Now look at the others. Nuclear is off the table, they oppose any new dams for hydro, they oppose any new clean coal and they have grave reservations about wave and tidal. You simply aren't going to replace some 50% of our power generation with Solar and wind. Taken one at a time, their policies are reasonable, taken together they are unworkable and nonsensical.

 

The Oz Greens live in a fantasyland, they are Ideologues that are impervious to logical thought or reason. This makes them very dangerous when in the "Balance of Power" situation. The upside is that their policies and behaviour will now become highlighted and they will probably go the way of the Democrats. I don't think it will take long for the Australian voters to work out that in a fight between the "environment and sustainability" and 50,000 jobs, the workers will lose every time. Note Browns comment on election night that a CO2 tax isn't a tax on the people, it would be charged on the elecricity generating companies so "the people" won't be paying it. Where does this fool think the generating companies get their money from? Fantasyland, pure dreamland.

 

The Democrats were in a similar position some years ago, it was their end. All fluff and bluster with no workable policies is not the way to re-election.

 

It's true the Greens did well this time, but from the figures I've seen, a lot of it was from ALP preferences, not Primary vote.

 

As for Bob Brown? The man is a twit. He stands "for" nothing, only against things. His position shifts based on what gives him sound bites on TV. He castigated the Howard gov for joining the invasion of Iraq, both publicly and from the Floor. What many have forgotten is that he castigated the Hawke/Keating gov (and the UN and everybody else) back in 1991 for not invading Iraq and toppling Saddam.

 

He's from the old guard, like the ALP people that still go around calling each other "comrade", whether he's a closet Malthusian as well, I'm not sure, but he acts like it.

 

The really interesting part of this Parliment are the swinging Independents. The lone Green is a watermelon and will side with Labor every time but the other three spice things up. For the first time in Australian electoral history, the "Opposition" have as much chance of introducing Bills and getting them passed as the "Government" does.

 

Previously only the "Gov" had the numbers on the Floor of the Lower House to introduce laws and get them passed, the Opposition could only try for amendments, with all the back room dealing that this implies. Now, the two major sides have to convince the three swinging votes as to who has the better legislation. For example, both sides have policies for the introduction of paid "Carers Leave". Previously it was the govs version or none, now it might be the Govs version, the Oppositions version, or a mix.

 

An experiment in Democratic Government that may work out very well provided that all concerned hold to high ethical standards. Since we're talking about politicians, there isn't much hope of that, so a complete cock up is highly probable. Meh, a barely functioning gov for 3 years is still better than a bad one for 3 years.

[rigney]

Rigney, we don't need to import your crazies, we have some very good ones of our own.

 

Dan, I don't hate the Greens, I just think that they're a bunch of people who are so far out of touch that they couldn't find reality with a Ouija board and a Star Chart.

 

A 40% reduction of CO2 on 1990 levels by 2020 is a great sounding policy. Now look at the others. Nuclear is off the table, they oppose any new dams for hydro, they oppose any new clean coal and they have grave reservations about wave and tidal. You simply aren't going to replace some 50% of our power generation with Solar and wind. Taken one at a time, their policies are reasonable, taken together they are unworkable and nonsensical.

 

The Oz Greens live in a fantasyland, they are Ideologues that are impervious to logical thought or reason. This makes them very dangerous when in the "Balance of Power" situation. The upside is that their policies and behaviour will now become highlighted and they will probably go the way of the Democrats. I don't think it will take long for the Australian voters to work out that in a fight between the "environment and sustainability" and 50,000 jobs, the workers will lose every time. Note Browns comment on election night that a CO2 tax isn't a tax on the people, it would be charged on the elecricity generating companies so "the people" won't be paying it. Where does this fool think the generating companies get their money from? Fantasyland, pure dreamland.

 

The Democrats were in a similar position some years ago, it was their end. All fluff and bluster with no workable policies is not the way to re-election.

 

It's true the Greens did well this time, but from the figures I've seen, a lot of it was from ALP preferences, not Primary vote.

 

As for Bob Brown? The man is a twit. He stands "for" nothing, only against things. His position shifts based on what gives him sound bites on TV. He castigated the Howard gov for joining the invasion of Iraq, both publicly and from the Floor. What many have forgotten is that he castigated the Hawke/Keating gov (and the UN and everybody else) back in 1991 for not invading Iraq and toppling Saddam.

 

He's from the old guard, like the ALP people that still go around calling each other "comrade", whether he's a closet Malthusian as well, I'm not sure, but he acts like it.

 

The really interesting part of this Parliment are the swinging Independents. The lone Green is a watermelon and will side with Labor every time but the other three spice things up. For the first time in Australian electoral history, the "Opposition" have as much chance of introducing Bills and getting them passed as the "Government" does.

 

Previously only the "Gov" had the numbers on the Floor of the Lower House to introduce laws and get them passed, the Opposition could only try for amendments, with all the back room dealing that this implies. Now, the two major sides have to convince the three swinging votes as to who has the better legislation. For example, both sides have policies for the introduction of paid "Carers Leave". Previously it was the govs version or none, now it might be the Govs version, the Oppositions version, or a mix.

 

An experiment in Democratic Government that may work out very well provided that all concerned hold to high ethical standards. Since we're talking about politicians, there isn't much hope of that, so a complete cock up is highly probable. Meh, a barely functioning gov for 3 years is still better than a bad one for 3 years.

 

Thank goodness, for a minute there I thought America had supplied you with a 'One Man Band". But then I happened to remember, we have to put up with Obama for the next two years. then you can have him.

Edited September 13, 2010 by rigney

[Dan6541]

Rigney, we don't need to import your crazies, we have some very good ones of our own.

 

Dan, I don't hate the Greens, I just think that they're a bunch of people who are so far out of touch that they couldn't find reality with a Ouija board and a Star Chart.

 

A 40% reduction of CO2 on 1990 levels by 2020 is a great sounding policy. Now look at the others. Nuclear is off the table, they oppose any new dams for hydro, they oppose any new clean coal and they have grave reservations about wave and tidal. You simply aren't going to replace some 50% of our power generation with Solar and wind. Taken one at a time, their policies are reasonable, taken together they are unworkable and nonsensical.

 

The Oz Greens live in a fantasyland, they are Ideologues that are impervious to logical thought or reason. This makes them very dangerous when in the "Balance of Power" situation. The upside is that their policies and behaviour will now become highlighted and they will probably go the way of the Democrats. I don't think it will take long for the Australian voters to work out that in a fight between the "environment and sustainability" and 50,000 jobs, the workers will lose every time. Note Browns comment on election night that a CO2 tax isn't a tax on the people, it would be charged on the elecricity generating companies so "the people" won't be paying it. Where does this fool think the generating companies get their money from? Fantasyland, pure dreamland.

 

The Democrats were in a similar position some years ago, it was their end. All fluff and bluster with no workable policies is not the way to re-election.

 

It's true the Greens did well this time, but from the figures I've seen, a lot of it was from ALP preferences, not Primary vote.

 

As for Bob Brown? The man is a twit. He stands "for" nothing, only against things. His position shifts based on what gives him sound bites on TV. He castigated the Howard gov for joining the invasion of Iraq, both publicly and from the Floor. What many have forgotten is that he castigated the Hawke/Keating gov (and the UN and everybody else) back in 1991 for not invading Iraq and toppling Saddam.

 

He's from the old guard, like the ALP people that still go around calling each other "comrade", whether he's a closet Malthusian as well, I'm not sure, but he acts like it.

 

The really interesting part of this Parliment are the swinging Independents. The lone Green is a watermelon and will side with Labor every time but the other three spice things up. For the first time in Australian electoral history, the "Opposition" have as much chance of introducing Bills and getting them passed as the "Government" does.

 

Previously only the "Gov" had the numbers on the Floor of the Lower House to introduce laws and get them passed, the Opposition could only try for amendments, with all the back room dealing that this implies. Now, the two major sides have to convince the three swinging votes as to who has the better legislation. For example, both sides have policies for the introduction of paid "Carers Leave". Previously it was the govs version or none, now it might be the Govs version, the Oppositions version, or a mix.

 

An experiment in Democratic Government that may work out very well provided that all concerned hold to high ethical standards. Since we're talking about politicians, there isn't much hope of that, so a complete cock up is highly probable. Meh, a barely functioning gov for 3 years is still better than a bad one for 3 years.

 

Would you admit that the Greens are a more socially progressive party, for example by allowing gay marriage? And at least they don't play on peoples fears like the Coalition has in relation to asylum seekers.

Edited September 13, 2010 by Dan6541

[JohnB]

Rigney, you do realise that America is directly responsible for the situation Australia now finds herself in, don't you?

 

We are quite proud of our political morons down here and generally view them as the equal of any other nations political gutter trash on a per capita basis. Being a smaller nation we are often "fighting outside our weight" as they say and have to make do with lunacies that befit our smaller size. For example when asked about how she allocated some $340 million dollars in funds, one of our Ministers replied that in her office there was a "great big whiteboard". With such high levels of governmental record keeping we thought that we were doing well.

 

However even we, purveyors of the politically absurd that we are, have to simply sit back and marvel as America sets new and amazing standards for the rest of us to aspire to. Having a Senator fearing that Guam would "tip over and capsize" was generally accepted as going to be hard to beat. When the South Carolina Democratic Primaries came around and we saw the inspired win by an outsider (Outsider? Hell, he and his Dad were the only ones that even knew he was in the race) we knew that if we were going to top the "Yanks" ordinary political incompetence wasn't going to cut the mustard.

 

We considered knifing our Prime Minister in the back, dumping her and having a quick reshuffle, but the Labor Party had already done that to Kevin Rudd and it was thought that repeating oneself would be rather "poor form". So in the best traditions of Australian Parlimentary ineptitude we decided to have an election. This idea was widely acclaimed by the populace and when polled 45% said "Yes, let's have an election.........What do they taste like?"

 

Having come to this decision we assembled three teams of highly trained (and paid) people to come up with election campaigns for the major parties. After much thought, late nights drinking and quite a few tears these teams came up with campaigns so unique and effective (in their own way) that even now learned papers are being written about them. Granted, they are for Medical Journals dealing with the treatment of Insomnia, but that's not the point. Do not deny these men and women their skill, as election campaigns are finely tuned and balanced down here. Voting is compulsory in Australia and so these dedicated and skilled teams have to walk the fine line between putting the population to sleep on all issues and yet still having them awake enough to actually go out and vote.

 

So, having turned the population into extras from "Night of the Living Dead 5" and managing to have not a single issue raise its head during the campaign and thereby polarise any of the populace whatsoever we went to the polls. By spending some millions of dollars and wasting everybodys time (those of us still awake anyway) we managed to demonstrate quite clearly that Australia is made of the same proportions of people as everywhere else: 45% left of centre, 45% right of centre and 10% radicals and independents.

 

I admit that there was some short lived confusion when it was announced that the we had a "hung" Parliment. Wild jubilation at the thought was mixed with a sense of sadness at not being able to actually tie the nooses yourself, and a further sadness when it was explained that that wasn't what a "hung" Parliment meant anyway.

 

However, ginen the size of Australia and the very short time in which to organise a screwup of national proportions, I don't think we did too bad. By handing control of the government of our nation to a small group who between them managed to poll 148,424 votes in a nation of 13,131,412 voters effectively means our gov was decided by 1.1% of the voting population thereby giving new and unintended meaning to the word "Democracy".

 

While perhaps not up to the grand standards of political incompetence that larger nations are used to, we feel that this is a sterling effort given the short time and limited budget involved.

 

Dan, a few things.

 

Firstly the Australian Greens don't do anything but play on peoples fears. Their irrational belief in catastrophic climate change is as good an example as any. I've been around politics for over 30 years and their constant (and I do mean constant) "End of the World" rhetoric is now boring beyond belief. The next time they say that there won't be some sort of ecological disaster will be a first. (I'm also old enough to remember the Greens marching with the Socialists in support of Pol Pot, which should tell you quite a bit about their views on population control.)

 

Secondly, I'm glad they brought gay marraige to the table, but I noticed that they didn't actually campaign too loudly on it, did they. Their seat in the Lower House wasn't even won on First Preferences but went to the wire, so maybe they thought it wasn't that much of a vote winner. Now the topic is on the table we'll see how they fare in the next election. I hope that they will be able to stimulate discussion on this as it is an important issue for many people. I freely admit that I'm in the camp of "I don't bloody know". Part of me says that justice requires that gay couples must have all the same rights as other couples, while there's another part that says that the word "marraige" should be reserved for the heteros because that is justice to the tradition of marraige. It's messy and there are no easy answers, but if we don't discuss the topic we won't find any answers. I don't want to go into this further here, but if you wish to start a thread we can discuss it there. Seeing Aussie politics discussed would make a change from the Republican/Democrat mud flinging that generally goes on.

 

Thirdly. "Socially Progressive"? What sort of a meaningless term is that? And since when has "Progressive" = "Good"? The Soviet Communists, the Nazis and just about every other mass murdering and populace purging bunch of psychotics were all "Socially Progressive" in their day. The Greens would be better off if they could articulate some rational idea as to where they are "progressing" to. It's like "Reconciliation". There are a multitude of plans that move us "closer to reconciliation", but nobody has the faintest idea of how to tell when we've arrived there. Look beyond the "feel good" rhetoric and you'll see the complete lack of destination or goal.

 

Fourthly. Let's see if you can answer a question that no "Socially Progressive" has managed to. I'm white. I was born here. My parents were born here. My grandparents were born here. On my mothers side the only white people who beat her ancestors here were Captain Cooks crew and whoever beat Lt. King off the "Supply" back in 1788. I know the "Dreaming Places" and the land sings in my sleep. So when exactly will I stop being considered an "Invader" and become "Indigenous"?

 

Cheers.

[rigney]

Rigney, you do realise that America is directly responsible for the situation Australia now finds herself in, don't you?

 

We are quite proud of our political morons down here and generally view them as the equal of any other nations political gutter trash on a per capita basis. Being a smaller nation we are often "fighting outside our weight" as they say and have to make do with lunacies that befit our smaller size. For example when asked about how she allocated some $340 million dollars in funds, one of our Ministers replied that in her office there was a "great big whiteboard". With such high levels of governmental record keeping we thought that we were doing well.

 

However even we, purveyors of the politically absurd that we are, have to simply sit back and marvel as America sets new and amazing standards for the rest of us to aspire to. Having a Senator fearing that Guam would "tip over and capsize" was generally accepted as going to be hard to beat. When the South Carolina Democratic Primaries came around and we saw the inspired win by an outsider (Outsider? Hell, he and his Dad were the only ones that even knew he was in the race) we knew that if we were going to top the "Yanks" ordinary political incompetence wasn't going to cut the mustard.

 

We considered knifing our Prime Minister in the back, dumping her and having a quick reshuffle, but the Labor Party had already done that to Kevin Rudd and it was thought that repeating oneself would be rather "poor form". So in the best traditions of Australian Parlimentary ineptitude we decided to have an election. This idea was widely acclaimed by the populace and when polled 45% said "Yes, let's have an election.........What do they taste like?"

 

Having come to this decision we assembled three teams of highly trained (and paid) people to come up with election campaigns for the major parties. After much thought, late nights drinking and quite a few tears these teams came up with campaigns so unique and effective (in their own way) that even now learned papers are being written about them. Granted, they are for Medical Journals dealing with the treatment of Insomnia, but that's not the point. Do not deny these men and women their skill, as election campaigns are finely tuned and balanced down here. Voting is compulsory in Australia and so these dedicated and skilled teams have to walk the fine line between putting the population to sleep on all issues and yet still having them awake enough to actually go out and vote.

 

So, having turned the population into extras from "Night of the Living Dead 5" and managing to have not a single issue raise its head during the campaign and thereby polarise any of the populace whatsoever we went to the polls. By spending some millions of dollars and wasting everybodys time (those of us still awake anyway) we managed to demonstrate quite clearly that Australia is made of the same proportions of people as everywhere else: 45% left of centre, 45% right of centre and 10% radicals and independents.

 

I admit that there was some short lived confusion when it was announced that the we had a "hung" Parliment. Wild jubilation at the thought was mixed with a sense of sadness at not being able to actually tie the nooses yourself, and a further sadness when it was explained that that wasn't what a "hung" Parliment meant anyway.

 

However, ginen the size of Australia and the very short time in which to organise a screwup of national proportions, I don't think we did too bad. By handing control of the government of our nation to a small group who between them managed to poll 148,424 votes in a nation of 13,131,412 voters effectively means our gov was decided by 1.1% of the voting population thereby giving new and unintended meaning to the word "Democracy".

 

While perhaps not up to the grand standards of political incompetence that larger nations are used to, we feel that this is a sterling effort given the short time and limited budget involved.

 

Dan, a few things.

 

Firstly the Australian Greens don't do anything but play on peoples fears. Their irrational belief in catastrophic climate change is as good an example as any. I've been around politics for over 30 years and their constant (and I do mean constant) "End of the World" rhetoric is now boring beyond belief. The next time they say that there won't be some sort of ecological disaster will be a first. (I'm also old enough to remember the Greens marching with the Socialists in support of Pol Pot, which should tell you quite a bit about their views on population control.)

 

Secondly, I'm glad they brought gay marraige to the table, but I noticed that they didn't actually campaign too loudly on it, did they. Their seat in the Lower House wasn't even won on First Preferences but went to the wire, so maybe they thought it wasn't that much of a vote winner. Now the topic is on the table we'll see how they fare in the next election. I hope that they will be able to stimulate discussion on this as it is an important issue for many people. I freely admit that I'm in the camp of "I don't bloody know". Part of me says that justice requires that gay couples must have all the same rights as other couples, while there's another part that says that the word "marraige" should be reserved for the heteros because that is justice to the tradition of marraige. It's messy and there are no easy answers, but if we don't discuss the topic we won't find any answers. I don't want to go into this further here, but if you wish to start a thread we can discuss it there. Seeing Aussie politics discussed would make a change from the Republican/Democrat mud flinging that generally goes on.

 

Thirdly. "Socially Progressive"? What sort of a meaningless term is that? And since when has "Progressive" = "Good"? The Soviet Communists, the Nazis and just about every other mass murdering and populace purging bunch of psychotics were all "Socially Progressive" in their day. The Greens would be better off if they could articulate some rational idea as to where they are "progressing" to. It's like "Reconciliation". There are a multitude of plans that move us "closer to reconciliation", but nobody has the faintest idea of how to tell when we've arrived there. Look beyond the "feel good" rhetoric and you'll see the complete lack of destination or goal.

 

Fourthly. Let's see if you can answer a question that no "Socially Progressive" has managed to. I'm white. I was born here. My parents were born here. My grandparents were born here. On my mothers side the only white people who beat her ancestors here were Captain Cooks crew and whoever beat Lt. King off the "Supply" back in 1788. I know the "Dreaming Places" and the land sings in my sleep. So when exactly will I stop being considered an "Invader" and become "Indigenous"?

 

Cheers.

You've said it all John B.!! If I tried debating the issue, it would take me hours to composr an answer, then I still probably wouldn't get right. Politics seem to go from bad to worse with every passing election. And that; it applies to any and all governments. How does the old saying go: The road to hell is paved with good intentions? Well, that's government for you. The "Indigenous' part? If I remember correctly the conversation we initially had, you asked why I had used the word "Aboriginal"? As a West virginian, I believe this guy singing the song can sum it better than I ever could.

 

The song?: "I was born a West Virginian". Edddy Bailes puts it together so well it brings back memories that just about breaks both my legs. I do get more than just homesick when I hear it. I suppose a true born Aussie must have the same feelings for that part of the world?

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1UyQwtdKE4

Edited September 13, 2010 by rigney

[JohnB]

Mate, I've pondered long on this but there is one song that really sums us up.

 

Most Aussies I know would have this as our National anthem in a second. It's who we are and where we came from.

 

As to where we are going, our Coat of Arms shows that. The Kangaroo and Emu weren't chosen just because they are native to Australia, they were chosen because they have an unusual feature. Neither can walk backwards.

 

 

Our actual National anthem is this one.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iGNhgMd6uM&feature=related

 

The second verse always gets me.

 

"Beneath our radiant Southern Cross,

We'll toil with hearts and hands,

To make this Commonwealth of ours,

Renowned of all the lands.

For those who've come across the seas,

We've boundless plains to share,

With courage let us all combine,

To Advance Australia Fair"

 

I look up every night and see the Southern Cross high in the heavens watching over our land and the promise we make to the future and the world every time we sing this Anthem.

 

Yes, I'm a very proud Aussie. I'm proud of my nation and what it stands for, working together to build a better future for all. We may not show it the way Americans do, but our patriotism and love of freedom and our nation run very deep. We judge both men and nations not by what they say, but what they do. Above all, we try not to take ourselves too seriously.

 

Cheers.

[rigney]

I'm sure this has been edited in someones favor at least a dozen times over the past few days? And while I have no idea of the man's political convictions, I sure as hell agree with his philosophy.

 

Yes!, We still have Americans capable of saying "no" the way Rudd has for Australian's, but; we need to get them out in front again!

 

Australian Prime Minister Rudd says "NO" a second time to Muslims!! and sure isn't backing down on his hard line stance. One has to appreciate his belief in Australian's rights.

 

It took a lot of courage for him to speak as he did and for the world to hear it. The chances of retribution from terrorist are risky, but at least he is willing to take that chance by standing up for Australian's beliefs.

 

The world needs leaders like; Prime Minister Kevin Rudd - Australia

 

Muslims wanting to live under Sharia law in Australia were told Wednesday to get out! Rudd, relating that there is no possible way two such diverse governments can function side by side in Australia. Thus targeting radicals in a bid to head off potential terrorist attacks. His comments angered many Australian Muslims by stating he openly supported spy agencies monitoring suspected mosques.

 

Quote by Rigney: "Kudos Prime Minister Rudd"! We used to monitor the K.K.K., Black Panthers, Weathermen, and a few other subversive "Nut Cases" but the practice is become rare nowadays.

 

By Rudd; Quote: 'IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take it or leave It. I'm tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individuals or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali, we have experienced a surge in patriotism by Australians.

 

Australian culture has been developing over two centuries by trial and error, tribulation, struggle and victory, by millions of men and women who sought, and fought for those rights and freedoms.

 

'We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society, Learn our language!'

 

'Most Australians believe in God. This is not a Christian right wing, radical push, but fact. Men and women of Christian faith founded this nation, which is clearly documented. So, it is certainly appropriate to display HIM on the walls of our schools, in our libraries and political offices. If our God offends you, consider some other part of the world for your new home, because God is a huge part of our culture.'

 

Australia is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all of this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly recommend you take advantage of another Australian freedom, 'THE FREEDOM TO LEAVE'.'

 

'If you aren't happy here with the way things are going, then go!. We didn't force you to come here, you asked to be here. So accept our country as it is, or get out.' Unquote.

 

You and Australia have much to be proud of Lad! Not so much unlike America was just a short time ago. Perhaps we here in States aught to inhale Mr. Rudd's words and savor their meaning for a moment?

 

Excusez moi! But Moontanman just set me straight on my error of believing first hand any and all "bull Sh--" you hear and forward without researching it. I really don't know at the moment just how much of this BS is truth, but I loved it! Even my stupid "Kudos" were genuine! When you supplant one unknown for another and not know the new ones face value, you're in trouble. Again, pardon my ignorance.

Edited September 23, 2010 by rigney

[JohnB]

Sorry mate, but our Kevin would never say any of that, he was too busy showing us all how well he spoke Chinese. Besides, he isn't PM anymore, his party dumped him.

 

A quick note on our political system. We don't vote for the Prime Minister. The PM is simply the leader of the party with the most seats in the Lower House. The party in power then was the Labor Party and Kevin Rudd was the leader, so he was PM. The party decided they were sick of him as leader and voted him out, to be replaced by Julia Gillard, so Julia became our PM. So we have a female Prime Minister. (I would have been happier if her brain cell count exceeded the single digits, but there you go.) One of the odd things about the system is that the PM is a sort of "First among equals" position and so the PM also has to win the election for his/her seat.

 

So it is quite possible for a gov to be returned to power at an election but for the PM to lose his seat, then since he is no longer PM (or in Parliment at all) the party has to choose a new leader who will become the PM. This is also true for our "Ministers of", the same as your "Secretarys of", they are serving politicians who have to defend their seat at election time. So if they are an incompetent Minister and everybody knows it, they will probably get the arse.

 

The flaw in the system is that the truly spectacular incompetents are given "safe" seats by the party where it would take a huge swing to unseat them. Between its start in July 2009 and its axing in Feb 2010, the "Home Insulation" scheme Peter Garrett managed caused 4 deaths and nearly 100 houses to burn down and cost $2.4 billion. We will also have to remove the insulation from some 50,000 homes and a further 150,000 homes will have to be checked for fire hazard. To manage all that damage in a mere 7 months is a form of stellar incompetence that even you Americans would find hard to match. However he was returned to Parliment at the last election, surviving an 8.93% swing against him at the polls. That is a "safe" seat.

 

What you quoted looks very like an email that's been running around. It's a bit of a mix because some parts are right and others are sooooo wrong.

 

As a nation, we were founded by Christians, however we practice total separation of Church and State. (We copied that from the US) There are no crosses in our political offices, halls or schools, except obviously church halls and religious schools. (Although we do open Parliment each day with a recitation of the "Lords Prayer", atheists and other religions are not required to participate.) The picture that is in all political offices, schools and most local halls is that of Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II, who is our Queen. As Australia is a Constitutional Monarchy, this is only right and proper.

 

However, it is right in that the attitude is: "You chose to come here, if you decide you don't like it, then feel free to leave." We feel no compulsion to change to suit anybody except ourselves.

 

There is something that muddies the waters a lot though and is often jumped on by the political extremes. There is misplaced anger and I'll bet the same is happening in the US too. There is a trend to not celebrate so openly Christmas and Easter and other religious holidays because it "might offend" the immigrants. This push is coming from the "Left" side of the political spectrum. The reaction however is not against the left, but people start to resent the immigrants for being "too thin skinned". The silly part is that if you actually ask any leader of an immigrant community, their answer is always the same "Do what you want, we don't care".

 

The next time one of these things blows up, look at who is doing the talking. I'll bet dollars to donuts that you won't see any immigrant, muslim, jew, bhuddist or calathumpian doing the complaining. It will be a white, anglo saxon complaining "on their behalf". Think back, have you ever seen an immigrant talking about this issue? Have you ever heard a muslim being upset about Christmas or Easter?

 

It's about using minorities for political and ideological ends.

 

Cheers.

[rigney]

Sorry mate, but our Kevin would never say any of that, he was too busy showing us all how well he spoke Chinese. Besides, he isn't PM anymore, his party dumped him.

 

A quick note on our political system. We don't vote for the Prime Minister. The PM is simply the leader of the party with the most seats in the Lower House. The party in power then was the Labor Party and Kevin Rudd was the leader, so he was PM. The party decided they were sick of him as leader and voted him out, to be replaced by Julia Gillard, so Julia became our PM. So we have a female Prime Minister. (I would have been happier if her brain cell count exceeded the single digits, but there you go.) One of the odd things about the system is that the PM is a sort of "First among equals" position and so the PM also has to win the election for his/her seat.

 

So it is quite possible for a gov to be returned to power at an election but for the PM to lose his seat, then since he is no longer PM (or in Parliment at all) the party has to choose a new leader who will become the PM. This is also true for our "Ministers of", the same as your "Secretarys of", they are serving politicians who have to defend their seat at election time. So if they are an incompetent Minister and everybody knows it, they will probably get the arse.

 

The flaw in the system is that the truly spectacular incompetents are given "safe" seats by the party where it would take a huge swing to unseat them. Between its start in July 2009 and its axing in Feb 2010, the "Home Insulation" scheme Peter Garrett managed caused 4 deaths and nearly 100 houses to burn down and cost $2.4 billion. We will also have to remove the insulation from some 50,000 homes and a further 150,000 homes will have to be checked for fire hazard. To manage all that damage in a mere 7 months is a form of stellar incompetence that even you Americans would find hard to match. However he was returned to Parliment at the last election, surviving an 8.93% swing against him at the polls. That is a "safe" seat.

 

What you quoted looks very like an email that's been running around. It's a bit of a mix because some parts are right and others are sooooo wrong.

 

As a nation, we were founded by Christians, however we practice total separation of Church and State. (We copied that from the US) There are no crosses in our political offices, halls or schools, except obviously church halls and religious schools. (Although we do open Parliment each day with a recitation of the "Lords Prayer", atheists and other religions are not required to participate.) The picture that is in all political offices, schools and most local halls is that of Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II, who is our Queen. As Australia is a Constitutional Monarchy, this is only right and proper.

 

However, it is right in that the attitude is: "You chose to come here, if you decide you don't like it, then feel free to leave." We feel no compulsion to change to suit anybody except ourselves.

 

There is something that muddies the waters a lot though and is often jumped on by the political extremes. There is misplaced anger and I'll bet the same is happening in the US too. There is a trend to not celebrate so openly Christmas and Easter and other religious holidays because it "might offend" the immigrants. This push is coming from the "Left" side of the political spectrum. The reaction however is not against the left, but people start to resent the immigrants for being "too thin skinned". The silly part is that if you actually ask any leader of an immigrant community, their answer is always the same "Do what you want, we don't care".

 

The next time one of these things blows up, look at who is doing the talking. I'll bet dollars to donuts that you won't see any immigrant, muslim, jew, bhuddist or calathumpian doing the complaining. It will be a white, anglo saxon complaining "on their behalf". Think back, have you ever seen an immigrant talking about this issue? Have you ever heard a muslim being upset about Christmas or Easter?

 

It's about using minorities for political and ideological ends.

 

Cheers.

 

Thanks for getting back John B., but Moontanman had already handed me my a-- for being so "gullible". And you're right! While radicals bring out the worst in all cultures, most folks just want to be left alone in a safe setting. And that "calathumpin" thing?, I've heard it, but not quite sure of what it means. Gonna look it up!

Edited September 27, 2010 by rigney