Expelled from university. What do?

[the outsider]

Hi Forumers,

 

>*Don't really expect an answer but merely an alternative path of thought*

 

I've got expelled from universities twice already, and contrary to my family's wishes decided to give up on higher education altogether and try to work my way up without a degree.

 

Spring semester just began and my father is coercing me (offering to pay tuition) to enroll in a _community college_ and pretty much give it a fresh start. He expects an answer by *today*.

 

I've made up my mind already. I've many job options. I started working as a freelance programmer/website designer and a waiter at night and considering i don't have almost any expenses at the present time living with my uncle (left home years ago, haven't seen my parents ever since but talk to them on regular basis) i calculated i can put off around $50K a year and invest it after a a few years, hoping it multiplies manifold.

 

My dream is to work as a scientist which requires university _degrees_ but i am well comfortable working with computers - my second passion.

 

I don't know which way I should go. The whole situation brought me a neurosis. I go from crying to anger/frustration episodes where i walk around the house holding my head and telling myself aloud what a fucked up idiot i am to cause this whole situation like this in the first place. I fear my inner want to go both ways is splitting my mental integrity and making me insane.

 

And then Robert Frost's poem comes to my mind about the road less traveled by and i feel like it's the way i should go.

 

What do you guys think?

 

Thanks

 

ps: Posted on other forums as well. so far ->

5 for go get degree b/ it's a standard irregardless of career.. 1 go own way; doesn't work go back to school.

 

ps2: inb4 what I did: expulsion grounds were 'hacking' & trespassing.

[D H]

I've got expelled from universities twice already, ... what I did: expulsion grounds were 'hacking' & trespassing.

Expelled for two separate criminal acts? It looks like you are off to a good start for a criminal career, but not to anything else.

 

My advice is to

1. Stop acting like a criminal.

2. Grow up / get some morals.

3. Go back to college.

 

You will find that the decision to not go to college will haunt you for the rest of your life. If you are honest about not having a college degree you will that the doorway to most of the jobs that appear to interest you is nailed shut. If you are dishonest and lie about having a degree it will catch up to you, and the consequences of that are very bad. Being fired is just the start. You can be sued for wages that have been paid to you.

Edited January 29, 2011 by D H

[Mr Skeptic]

If you've already made up your mind, what are you seeking advice for? Surely you don't need someone else to confirm your wishes so you can tell your dad that someone else agrees with you?

 

If you have a certain job that you enjoy perhaps that would be the better option. Both college and work experience are valuable, however work as a waiter doesn't seem like it would suit you nor be particularly valuable. You can also enroll in college part-time. As for "hacking", perhaps you should consider whether people would be willing to hire former hackers to work with their computers, websites, or program for them. It could really mess up your life (yet more) if you get yourself a criminal record for hacking, so a little self-control there.

[StringJunky]

You reap what you sow...spread ill-will and that's what you'll get back. Start again by promising to make your future endeavours honest ones.

Edited January 29, 2011 by StringJunky

[the outsider]

You will find that the decision to not go to college will haunt you for the rest of your life. If you are honest about not having a college degree you will that the doorway to most of the jobs that appear to interest you is nailed shut. If you are dishonest and lie about having a degree it will catch up to you, and the consequences of that are very bad. Being fired is just the start. You can be sued for wages that have been paid to you.

 

Thank you. Rigid situations sometimes call for shady actions. I'm indeed afraid that this decision will haunt me and that's pretty much why i am here. What are you basing your statement upon btw? Have you known anybody who has regretted it? What kind of people were they?

 

If you've already made up your mind, what are you seeking advice for? Surely you don't need someone else to confirm your wishes so you can tell your dad that someone else agrees with you?

 

My decision is viable to change. I decided myself but under continuous pressure from "family" which didn't really give a damn about me until they heard i'm giving up on academia altogether I'd like to analyze the decision and get reputable input. And honestly i'm scared the wrong choice will severely impact my life and all my goals, dreams and ideas will come to naught.

 

I've talked to some people I know and the consensus was to go my own way (no *degree*). It's the same people who offered me jobs or contacts for one before. Mostly people ~<30, working in computer fields themselves, (pentesters, sysadmins, programmers, etc), many finished colleges, but also many _have not_ and they are leading fairly decent lives financially, socially and culturally. They have a loathing for education though and most of their opinions come based on *my appearance* and not on realia ("I know you. I'm sure you'll do well")

 

 

 

If you have a certain job that you enjoy perhaps that would be the better option. Both college and work experience are valuable, however work as a waiter doesn't seem like it would suit you nor be particularly valuable. You can also enroll in college part-time. As for "hacking", perhaps you should consider whether people would be willing to hire former hackers to work with their computers, websites, or program for them. It could really mess up your life (yet more) if you get yourself a criminal record for hacking, so a little self-control there.

 

Thanks. The issue here is not money (if i can get a decent job without a degree). My work already pays well and i pretty much don't spend my earnings, but it's not the kind of things i'd like to see myself doing in 10 years. Lack of growth opportunities. I'd like to aim for top positions and generally satisfy my need for feeling of importance and meaningful life.

 

Also there is a fairly long list of successful college dropouts and I wonder if i can well match them in persistence, creativity and luck.

 

 

Anyhow, I appreciate all your input folks.

Edited January 29, 2011 by the outsider

[ewmon]

[My Dad] expects an answer by *today*.

To me, this heavy-handedness shows what you grew up with (and it's no wonder you went away and goofed off). Obviously such a decision requires more time than *today*."

 

Most importantly, ask yourself what you want to do for most of your life -- or at least in your young adulthood (and surfer dude, game tester and rock star don't count). Discover your MBTI personality type. Test youself a few times over the course of several months. Then choose your career. If you shoot at, for example, International Financier, and you don't make the grade, then you might find yourself working as Loan Manager at a local bank or maybe as a Teller, but it'll at least be in your choice of profession, and you can work your way up from where you begin. The last thing you want to do is pick anything just to be able to tell the old man yes or no *today*.

 

You should take a good amount of time to choose. Ask Dad to let you work a basic local job while you decide. If you don't know where to begin, ask yourself what you think is wrong or right with the world. You can hitch your wagon to what's right with the world. You can become a pioneer in combating what's wrong with the world. If something about your work doesn't move you to the core, then, "Meh, it's a job", and you become another loser zombie among the billions of other loser zombies that slave away for the rest of your life. Do something that MOVES you.

 

If you haven't "grown up" yet, then apply yourself in that direction. If you're not ready for school, then you're not ready.

Edited January 29, 2011 by ewmon

[jackson33]

I'd guess "the outsider" knew full well before writing his post, what the decision was going to be and frankly from reading his post, he will do just fine. I don't believe he is a pending "criminal" or anything of the sort, nor would I suggest not accepting his Dad's money or for most young folks borrowing money to make a third attempt at this point in his life, is necessarily a bad thing. Interest in Science, a passion for computers and landing a 50K job in today's economy adds up to a whole lot of common sense. If he sticks to "his plan" investing and building a nest egg, the education can come anytime and no place in the world I live in does it say that secondary education has to come at 18 years of age or so....

 

As for College for the average person, in the first place, I don't know how many college Graduates I've hired to drive trucks, work in warehouses or run some small business. TODAY, these kids are coming out of college owing thousands of dollars (some over 100kK$) and simply can't find A JOB.

 

My two cents....

[Marat]

University studies will enrich your life far beyond whatever they will contribute to your getting a better job and earning a living. Perhaps there are many areas of study, introspection, and personal development which you have not even been able to consider yet, simply because you have not had the full exposure to all the opportunities there are for personal and intellectual growth at a university. I have known a few millionaires who skipped university and grew up to be brainless, tasteless, empty people because they never had the advantage of an institutional setting pulling them out of themselves and giving them a chance to develop more fully. As a result, they spent their money on useless trinkets, felt that their inner lives were empty, and passed their time in vacuuous pursuits, since all the money in the world could not buy them the personal development they needed to make their lives worth living.

 

In your situation I would definitely return to university, but I would avoid the community college route, since that will not give you the enrichment you need. Since reputable universities are now accessible to students even with deficient academic backgrounds, you should by all means throw yourself into the wealth of knowledge and experience available only at a real university.

[the outsider]

Thanks everyone. I appreciate the help. EOF

[Athena]

Expelled for hacking? Why did you do that twice? Is the reason for this behavior something you can change or not? How long do you think it would take you to make the change? If you aren't willing to do things differently, than doing the same thing will get the same result, and that would make returning to college a waste of their money and your time.

 

 

In Europe it is expected for the young to travel and learn about life, before committing to a career. Tell your Dad if he really cares about your education, to send you to a foreign country for a year. For sure, you will come home a whole lot smarter. One of those countries where people are dying because of poverty, and do not have the choices your have, would be a good choice. or-

 

Get the audio tapes "The Cashflow Ouadrant" by Robert T. Kiyosaki with Sharon L. Lechter C.P.A. and find out what it takes to become a million by investing money. You may not like the effort that takes, any more than you evidently like the effort required in college. Before you can make that decision you need to know what it will take. Also, how long is your uncle willing to support you? That is important, because your plan to accumulate money and then invest seems to depend on someone else, so you have to be sure you can depend on this person long enough to achieve your goal. That is not a good path to take if your uncle isn't willing to support you. Without a college degree, it is can be pretty hard to be financially independent and accumulate enough money for investing. However with support and the knowledge you need for investing, you could become a millionaire, and people who work for a living don't do so well. It is amazing to me that education prepares the young to be products for industry, but not to invest wisely and become wealthy. We live in a capitalist society, and one might think the priority would be preparing our young to be capitalist.

Edited January 31, 2011 by Athena