Do things start to seem more "non important" as life goes on?

[jadef7]

Over the years, things have just been getting boring, and like.. in a way some thigns in life have started to not mean much.

I could remember when i was like 10-13 and i would always look forward to holidays and my birthday, and it would be so exciting and what not, but now im almost 17.. and my birthday comes around, pssh.. its just another day. christmas? ehh.. just another day. i dont understand lol. the days seem to go on very VERY fast now, and things like making out with girls and having fun are starting to just get "ehh". am i losing the importance of life or does it happen as you get older lol? i dont really have problems and psychological issues, just wondering why things are geettting so bland lol.

 

thatnks

Jade

[lemur]

Over the years, things have just been getting boring, and like.. in a way some thigns in life have started to not mean much.

I could remember when i was like 10-13 and i would always look forward to holidays and my birthday, and it would be so exciting and what not, but now im almost 17.. and my birthday comes around, pssh.. its just another day. christmas? ehh.. just another day. i dont understand lol. the days seem to go on very VERY fast now, and things like making out with girls and having fun are starting to just get "ehh". am i losing the importance of life or does it happen as you get older lol? i dont really have problems and psychological issues, just wondering why things are geettting so bland lol.

Probably because you're gaining enough life experience and pattern-recognition skills for your feeling of newness in things you had as a child and as a pubescent adolescent to fade. Be careful not to fall into the habit of finding everything just another boring iteration of something old. Try to seek out the uniqueness of each experience and consider what makes it special. It's cliche' but it's like the expression that no two snowflakes are alike. All of nature is like this and even social experiences can be experienced as unique or just another repetition. In truth, social conformity does tend to make social interaction very repetitive, but if you look for the nuances and focus on those and attempt to innovate in your own expressions (in constructive ways please), I think you'll find that there is more happiness to be found than in dwelling on the blandness of it all. If you want a spicy life you have to cultivate spice and put it out there yourself. You can't rely on others and also be prepared for their blandness to suck up all the spice you can put out. Sorry for taking the spiced-food analogy so far but it seemed to work well.

[jadef7]

haha yea thanks for the reply, so is it normal or what.. i find a lot of joy in things but i know what your saying 100% lol.

analogy's are always good lol theres not a bad one for anything , unless it makes no sense.

and my post wasnt meant to be like.. you no a confidence builder or anything wierd , was just like a "constructive question" lol, wondered if a lot of people go thru it

[Mr Skeptic]

I think it's perfectly normal and probably healthy. The same has occurred for me. Odds are you probably have a pleasant or productive life and aren't bored too much or time would seem to take forever to pass. As to why you aren't excited about presents day anymore, odds are you can now buy anything anyone would give you several times over, and it's probably not as exciting an experience as it was the first dozen times. If you want more excitement, seek new experiences because doing the old things yet again won't be as exciting as the first few times you did them.

[Mr Rayon]

jadef7 I am 19 now and I understand completely with what you're saying and I'm sure most people my age can empathize with you too!

 

The problems seems to be that you're lacking mental stimulation, you are bored with your constant predictable routines in life and you are sick of the current decadent society you are living in. And you mentioned even the promiscuous life-style you have adopted bores you now, when you thought it once to be exciting. This is likely to be the case because the relationships you formed probably didn't really mean that much to you, they were instinctual desires you were responding too. However, you are hungry for commitment + responsibilities + a change in your current life-style. You want to get away from where you are heading now as the destination seems increasingly bleak as time passes by and it will only get worse if you don't do something quick about this.

 

You lack direction and need a purpose. Religion offers a purpose. Do you believe in god(s)/God?

 

Many of my highschool friends suffered long-term depression whilst they were doing their final year. So, straight after they decided to travel overseas, understood a variety of cultures and became conversational in a few foreign languages. They were cured!

 

However, yes I do believe if you continue to neglect this problem or ignore it you will keep thinking everything as being more unimportant. Search for a purpose in life. Solve world poverty/global injustices, strive to make this world a better place!

[TonyMcC]

Speaking as a quite old man I would say don't worry - I well remember driving my parents mad when I was your age by continually letting them know I was so bored. Things will soon change, you have a bit more development to work your way through first and that will happen. Soon you will find that other people and your relationship with them will become more important to you than your own feelings of "I'm so bored". Perhaps you could find and develop an interest in something. The other thing that added to my feelings of "what can I do to relieve these feelings of going nowhere in a sea of boredom " was a lack of money! If that is not part of your problem then you could take up something like gliding. You are old enough to fly solo. A lot of people are involved in getting gliders in the air! You might find youself driving tractors, operating winches, holding wing tips and running with them for the first few metres of the launch. There will also be a social side. This is just one idea. I am sure that if this does not appeal then you can think of something. By the way, now I am in what might quaintly be called the Autumn of my life, I look back and see that as soon as I emerged from my time of boredom I entered a very exciting, interesting and fullfilling life - I am sure you will do the same.

[Marat]

Everything seems hyper-exciting when you are young because it is all happening for the first time. But then when things start happening for the second, third, fourth, and fifth time, they naturally become rather predictable and less interesting. Also, psychologists maintain that we experience time as a ratio, so since when you are 10 each year is 10% of your life, all experience seems dilated and intensified, while at 50 each year wisks by at a mere 2% and so all the experiences in it seem to be nothing more than fleeting, pale, rushed imitations of a thousand things like them that have all happened many times before. I believe this change in the quality of experience is one of the reasons why very old people are not worried about dying: they have already had enough.

 

If people really paid attention to this phenomenon they would recognize how profoundly silly the promise of most religions, that all the problems of life will somehow be made good by your having an infinitely long additional life after you are dead, really is.

[jadef7]

thanks for everyones replys, but to answe a few questions, no i dont really believe in god, i would say i have no preference, as i cant see god actually existing, but i cant see how everyone was just made, nothing can be created or destoryed, lol atleast, what i've known.. and idk. i just hade no preference with religion. but I've swam for 10 years, ever since i was 6.. very competitive you could say. you could also so I am very fast, a lot of kids are fast , but they're not efficent as I am. i move through the water very easily, it works well with me, i guess i just naturally fow through it, but thats only because i've swim 2/3 of my life lol. but swimming is another good example of things getting old.

 

before races when i was younger, i would be so so so nervous, especially at big meets. i would get very nervous and tense to swim fast. but now, pssh. its more of a lets just get it over type thing lol.. im stilll one of the fastest around here but i mean, it doesnt really mean that much to me anymore , it does, but it doesnt SEEM like a big deal at all really.

 

like the state meet here in washington, i got first in an event and it's like, dang, why cant i be a little kid when i would actually be VERY VERY VERY excited about this. yea its cool i got a first but like, i dont no it doesnt seem so real and intense. its like wow, lol IM LOSING EMOTIONS, jkjk haha, and btw, im a dude, i dont have the girl hormones or w/e lmao.. im not moody

 

and another thing, i find joy and pleasure in studying, like learning new things. im a sophmore in highscool, but this is my second year of calculus, 2nd year of phhysics, ive taken bio and chem... idk i just like learning new things (4th year spanish) at my school i would need so many credits to graduate, and i have all the requiremnts dont, i just need electives, (like pottery and web design and dumb stuff) lol, wastes of my life i call it, so i elect to take core classes. im not really a nerd or a genius, i just have a passion for learning things. its wierd lol

 

thanks again for all the posts (:

Jade

[ewmon]

im almost 17.. and ... the days seem to go on very VERY fast now

You ain't seen nuthin' yet.

 

I think it involves focus on self versus focus on others. When focus shifts to the larger world around us, we focus on more things, perhaps make as many mistakes, but feel more responsible, it all keeps us very busy, and time flies. Wow, does it ever fly!

[jadef7]

time has started flying. the days are ZOOMING! literally very fast.

[Mr Rayon]

If people really paid attention to this phenomenon they would recognize how profoundly silly the promise of most religions, that all the problems of life will somehow be made good by your having an infinitely long additional life after you are dead, really is.

 

I disagree! Heaven is a beautiful place, a better environment, way better than the hell-hole we humans call planet Earth. In fact it's probably so beautiful that it's beyond our level of comprehension. Try to visualize it. The most beautiful place ever created, can you do it? A place where there's no poverty or injustice. It's quite difficult to completely visualize but I'm sure there are people who can understand the associated emotions from living in such a place even if they have never been/lived there. This is all part of the process of being open-minded to different ideas.

[jadef7]

i know what your trying to say haha, ive tried to imagin what heaven looks like when i was younger, and it was so beautiful, quite euphoric, but I think i'm starting to believe that people only believe in god/heaven/etc... just so they arent scared to do, and that if they loook forward to being somewhere when they're dead there is nothing to fear,

 

sorry if that offended anyone

 

thanks,

Jade

[Mr Rayon]

i know what your trying to say haha, ive tried to imagin what heaven looks like when i was younger, and it was so beautiful, quite euphoric, but I think i'm starting to believe that people only believe in god/heaven/etc... just so they arent scared to do, and that if they loook forward to being somewhere when they're dead there is nothing to fear,

 

But you don't know this for sure, do you?

Two of my friends who were completely unreligious (agnostic/atheist) converted to two different religions. One to Islam and the other to Buddhism. They're living much more fulfilling lives now (at least that's what they say). I call them religious fanatics but they laugh at me when I say this and they say that they are not really that religious. So, yeah there are a bunch of religions out there searching/wanting for new people to join. Some people like to view religions, particularly the Abrahamic religions as being book clubs, nothing wrong with book clubs, right? ...Literary fanatics....and I see in your profile you say you like studying, so maybe religion is indeed for you even though you don't believe in god(s)/God/G-d at the moment.

[padren]

But you don't know this for sure, do you?

Two of my friends who were completely unreligious (agnostic/atheist) converted to two different religions. One to Islam and the other to Buddhism. They're living much more fulfilling lives now (at least that's what they say). I call them religious fanatics but they laugh at me when I say this and they say that they are not really that religious. So, yeah there are a bunch of religions out there searching/wanting for new people to join. Some people like to view religions, particularly the Abrahamic religions as being book clubs, nothing wrong with book clubs, right? ...Literary fanatics....and I see in your profile you say you like studying, so maybe religion is indeed for you even though you don't believe in god(s)/God/G-d at the moment.

But we don't really know for sure if there is a god or which one is right, so if you want to play it safe, best bet is to have no religion - if there is a god, it's only reasonable that you'd be forgiven for waiting until "the big face to face" to believe in the right one, but probably a lot harder to be forgiven for following the wrong one.

 

 

 

Regarding OP:

The more you start to form a cohesive world view, you develop a sense of "scope" about how important any single event is. When you are younger, your sense of "scope" is usually based on your immediate feelings, which is why scary movies are much scarier and holidays are much more exciting for young kids than adults.

 

At the same time, you also develop a deeper appreciation for some things, while other things matter less: it's only natural to feel as you do as you get older and take a more personal role in weighing what matters to you based on your own personally developed values and experiences. Initially it feels like apathy or disillusionment, and then you end up feeling more strongly about a few things, roughly as strongly about a lot of things, and just don't worry so much about all the rest.