I am looking for a phD position in immunology,please help me

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I am a student in non-English-speaking country,looking for a position in immunology.

so I hope some here could help me to revise my motivation leeter.

 

here is the letter I prepared.

 

 

Dear prof.

 

I’m a first year MSc student in department life science at the.......University,China.I would like to submit my candidature for the PhD position in Research groups Immunology division,department Infectious Diseases and Immunology, faculty Veterinary Medicine,........University. With a Bachelor’s in agronomy and an MSc in biophysics, I expect that the PhD position will contribute enormously to my future reserach plans. I also believe that I would be a valuable addition to your department.

 

Before specializing in immunology,I spent 4 years of my undergraduate studies on various aspects of biology, including general biology, botany, plant physiology microbiology, developmental biology and so on. In the third year, I fully engaged myself into a China-Australia cooperated project about bioenergy. I learned lots of experiment skills and more importantly,how to find possibilities of ture value in certain research area and in multidisciplinaries as well, optimizing the experiment process,and estimating the feasibilities contained in an idea.My current academic is specialized in DNA vaccine.The very best practical experience of me includes flow cytometry and EILSA.Important experiment skills are,more important is the way to think both scientifically and imaginatively.

 

I realized the importance of science reaserch for me when I participated in the project of bioenergy in undergraduate period.Not only of great interesting to do reaserch work,but also brings me the pleasant to be creative.Then I determined to undertake reaserch works to fulfill my future career.When I was in my first year of postgraduate period,I got into the world of immunology.Kowning it is one of the most research interests in world and the delicate mechanism of immune system,I decided to further my education on this subject.I met with prof.......,who is my introducer, not far ago.He brought my fellows and me lots of developed and novel research highlights,which inspire us and widen our horizons,I am thankful to got his appreciation.

 

Personal characteristics of perseverance and diligence will sustain me in the the PhD program.My previous experience has taught me how to coordinate my efforts with other highly motivated individuals as well as to undertake tasks independently. I am confident that this background and abilities would serve me well on your departmentyou’re your group. I would appreciate the opportunity to discuss my qualifications and the PhD position in more detail. <BR style="mso-special-character: line-break"><BR style="mso-special-character: line-break">

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yours Sincerely,

 

Thanks in advance

 

 

please give me some advices in writting the motivation letter.