Malevolent friends/co-workers

[Mr Rayon]

I think people within our society are becoming increasing malevolent and unsympathetic. Share us your stories.

 

Have you ever felt as though one of your friends or co-workers at work were happy that something painful or unfortunate happened to you or to one of your relatives?

 

What should you do if you know they are being malevolent?

 

I've also heard of the notion that good people always see the good in others. However, does this mean that they have to be blind to the evilness in others?

Edited March 15, 2011 by Voltman

[ecoli]

I think people within our society are becoming increasing malevolent and unsympathetic. Share us your stories.

 

Have you ever felt as though one of your friends or co-workers at work were happy that something painful or unfortunate happened to you or to one of your relatives?

 

What should you do if you know they are being malevolent?

 

I've also heard of the notion that good people always see the good in others. However, does this mean that they have to be blind to the evilness in others?

No. because of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trait_ascription_bias

 

and: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Availability_heuristic

[Phi for All]

People in this 24/7 media/information-driven society may have more of a tendency to perceive unfair class distinctions (especially with sports/entertainment celebrities who seems to court the media more than the blueblood wealthy), but I think ecoli is right, it's mostly our tendencies towards some sort of bias. Sometimes we start thinking our fellow workers have it in for us and then that's all we think of, and we ignore anything that challenges what we believe is true in favor of any little thing that supports it.

[jackson33]

Voltman; Maybe it's people are more sensitive to what others think today, believe more and more people are malevolent, when they are probably not. Said another way, in my day when a person disagreed with me or others, the idea either them or us would hold a grudge was literally unheard of. While I really don't people generally wish evil on anybody, short of a truly hateful attitude, which of course has always been the rule.

 

What should you do if you know they are being malevolent?[/Quote]

 

If for some reason a person is so uncomfortable in their own shoes, or in some way feels threatened, I'd suggest approaching that person and asking them. The probability is that person would not understand what your talking about, but if what you thought (not know) was correct, then that person is simply not your friend or if on the job, part of life.

[Sisyphus]

I have not personally noticed any uptick in malevolence.

[A Tripolation]

I have not personally noticed any uptick in malevolence.

 

It's because you're stupid.

[ecoli]

I have not personally noticed any uptick in malevolence.

 

The two anecdotes cancel. Pppl don't change.

[Sisyphus]

It's because you're stupid.

 

Random abuse, of course, remains robust.

 

The two anecdotes cancel. Pppl don't change.

 

But last time, the anecdotes didn't cancel.

[A Tripolation]

Random abuse, of course, remains robust.

 

I was hoping you'd notice the irony in your post, and my response to your post without me having to put an emoticon. Sorry if you took it seriously.

[Sisyphus]

I was hoping you'd notice the irony in your post, and my response to your post without me having to put an emoticon. Sorry if you took it seriously.

 

Yes, I knew you were making a joke. I thought that was clear. Damn you, forum medium!

[Ankles]

What should you do if you know they are being malevolent?

 

My rule of thumb is to avoid them where possible. Once someone makes it to my "jerk" list, I basically write them off. I never stoop to their level or seek revenge; it's not worth the karma hit.

 

I've also heard of the notion that good people always see the good in others. However, does this mean that they have to be blind to the evilness in others?

 

Hmm, no. I think I'm mostly a good and decent person (although there are those who might disagree, natch), but I can see both the good and bad in people. Being good doesn't mean being blind. It simply means being aware that both things exist in that person. Being good might also define how you handle any given person.

[lemur]

I think people experience various forms of disenfranchisement and they feel bitterness about it because they have the feeling that what happened to them was due to no fault of their own yet it didn't happen to others and those others expect them not to rain on their parade. Eventually, I think they begin to realize that they are better off for going through whatever it was they went through, and other people are more vulnerable for not having been through it yet. The irony is that once you've come to terms with the thing that caused your malevolence, you have a strong inner-peace that tends to bring out the malevolence in others. It's like their problems get amplified for them because they see that you've come to terms with yours. So it that sense, what goes around can come around.

[Doc. Josh]

I think people have stayed the same it's just more prevelant due to increase in in technology ex( face book, cell phones, media) have made it more visible.

[Phi for All]

I think people have stayed the same it's just more prevelant due to increase in in technology ex( face book, cell phones, media) have made it more visible.

We tend to do poorly when our number of social relationships exceeds around 150. Perhaps the new social media technology is stretching the limit of our ability to deal with so many people.

[xxSilverPhinxx]

I think people experience various forms of disenfranchisement and they feel bitterness about it because they have the feeling that what happened to them was due to no fault of their own yet it didn't happen to others and those others expect them not to rain on their parade. Eventually, I think they begin to realize that they are better off for going through whatever it was they went through, and other people are more vulnerable for not having been through it yet. The irony is that once you've come to terms with the thing that caused your malevolence, you have a strong inner-peace that tends to bring out the malevolence in others. It's like their problems get amplified for them because they see that you've come to terms with yours. So it that sense, what goes around can come around.

 

Good insight, I think.