Beast Posted January 2, 2012 Posted January 2, 2012 Helllo My name is beast unleashed well thats my PC gamer name but i am rather fond of it. I am very intrested in Psychology and was wondering if you people could give me another way of looking at things. I want to understand why people do things.Things like smoking, taking drugs.swearing.bulling. everythink that if i person was to actually think about it would not do it but yet they do.The sources ive looked at mostly saying because they enjoy it but i want to go even deeper than that. Thank you.This is my first post on your website dont be too harch
iNow Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 If you want to go really deep, people do these things because of their neurochemicals. There are certain actions that provide a reward response, and others which are an emergent property of the way our neural web is composed. Drugs exploit existing pleasure and reward centers. Swearing is a social phenomenon and we're a social species where it matters how we express ourselves and how we're perceived. Same with bullying. There's often a selection pressure favoring the strongest, and bullying seems related to that. It's the same phenomenon which causes people to seek power, or land, or control... just more biological and before inhibitions have really kicked in or been taught. Often we do things and don't know why. We are the product of our genetics and experiences, and we're not always conscious or aware of why we feel or do the things we do. Part of life is learning about the world, and doing so often requires us to learn about ourselves. Neuroscience is a fascinating field. Have you ever explored sites like the ones I linked below (don't be put off by the name... they're fantastic resources): http://faculty.washington.edu/chudler/introb.html http://www.dls.ym.edu.tw/chudler/introb.html
Beast Posted January 3, 2012 Author Posted January 3, 2012 If alllways been fascinated with why people do things without a real reason From things like drinking and getting drunk to people smoking.We all know its dangerous and dumb but yet we as humans do it to are sefls and then called a natural part of life. Its strange there isnt like a form of brain reflex that stops us from doing this sort of thing. simlier to the way reflexs work when you for example touch something hot and pull your hand back as soon as possible.
iNow Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 If there WAS such a reflex, we'd never get into our cars. That's dangerous. If there WAS such a reflex, we'd never go out and hunt food. That's dangerous. If there WAS such a reflex, we'd never do a lot of things... We calculate potential risks against potential reward. We drink and smoke and do dumb things because it feels good. Our more evolved brains (prefrontal cortex, etc.) know it's bad for us, but our more ancient brains (like the reptilian core) just want what makes us feel good. Again, though... If we had a reflex like that in our brains where we pulled away like a hand on a hot fire, we'd never take risks and would consequently never achieve the payoff which often comes with such risks.
Beast Posted January 3, 2012 Author Posted January 3, 2012 Okey, yes thats intresting.But what if they dont enjoy it. Take "Peer pressure". hypothetical scenario.A guys at club with some friends everyone else is drinking.He goes and gets hammered with them allthought he does not want to.The next day he realy regrets what happen. pictures of it went on fb pla pla pla. Why take that sort of risk from there being little chance of actualy getting something from it?.Simple hypothetical scenario but fits the explaining of it well oh and im very into chance by the way
iNow Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 I would challenge the idea that they get nothing from acquiescing to peer pressure. They receive the acceptance of their peers, and sense of community. They prioritize the benefit of being "one of the guys" over the cost of "getting hammered one night." We also don't often take appropriate recognition of the actual costs until we review the action retrospectively.
Beast Posted January 3, 2012 Author Posted January 3, 2012 May i ask what is your personal opinion on smoking/drinking/sex underage/ect opinion as in would you do/not do it what do you think about it?
iNow Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 They were all good learning experiences. I was perhaps a bit more wild and adventurous than most, and I took some risks that others probably wouldn't. There are some behaviors that... in retrospect... and with the wisdom which has come with age... I wish I had never tried or started. Smoking was definitely one of them, but I've been quit for a long time now anyway, and am much better off as a result. I respect peoples right to choose for themselves, though. If I care about them, I may try to persuade them toward certain courses of action... But part of being free is also being free to make our own mistakes and to follow our own paths through this life. I just hope that the mistakes are mostly worth it, and that we ultimately learn from them and improve.
Beast Posted January 3, 2012 Author Posted January 3, 2012 Yes this is why im so intrested in psychology,due to other peoples un logical actions rather than my own. Most to do with being concerned with friends that do with sort of thing and me being so against it im in my teenage years so this stuff come up alot.I end up getting into arguements with closest friends due to disagree with them and them allways coming back with the statement "its normall every does it".Is this the case because i do feel preety different seeming to be the only one totally against it? or have i got the wrong end of the stick? bare in mind i do get into these arguments due to careing and worrying like hell;) about them
iNow Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 Just because a lot of people do something does not automatically make it right. It just means that it's something that a lot of people do. Your friends want to experience it, and you do not. That's fine. That's normal. You can only decide for yourself what to do and what not to do. That's your choice, and you cannot choose for them. I know it's hard because your intentions are good, but at some point you'll need to back away and just accept that their choice is different from yours. If you do not... and you keep arguing with them... they may prioritize the desire to engage in these sorts of behaviors as more important than their friendship with you. If you're their friend, you accept them for who they are, not who you wish they were. Peer pressure is a bitch, but it gets better as you age and become more confident in who you are as a person... as you unleash the beast within.
Sergeant Bilko Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 Hi Beast People have many many reasons for doing things, there are as many reasons for doing things as there are things to do. Why do some people exhibit criminal behavior for example? Its far to simple to say its because they are bad, although they may be. What gives you a kick, may not give me a kick because our experiences of life have been so different. Many psychologists will tell you that the way you look at the world, your schema, is set by the time you are seven years old and that is shaped by the way you were treated when you were very young. The way you view the world very much depends upon the way you are feeling at that precise moment. Some other peoples actions may seem "un logical" to you, and likewide how you see things are the reverse for them. We all have our own version of reality which is unique to each and every one of us. John Grays' book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus gives a good illustration of this and is well worth reading to understand the different perspectives. Psychology is a huge subject and there are very few definate answers as to why, only clues.
Beast Posted January 4, 2012 Author Posted January 4, 2012 Is there anyway in which i should try to help these friends and new friends?.You said it there right yes.But surely its so dangerous at the age of 14up and they treat it as a every day thing Your see ive recently moved schools around 140 miles in the other direction and Everyone in my new school is a completly a different world. From a young age ive allways been intrested in helping people from things like opening a door.To standing up to bullies. Allthought i can make very little diffence to the lives of the friends left behind.It worries me greatly that i can do little so wish to help people that i currently can is this a wise idea. Or should i let people make there own mistakes which i find very hard to do due to feelinging so worried and partly to plain for not stopping it. Too give a example of what i mean a girl ive be befriended asked me what my morals on sex was after i asked what her thoughts were due to a convo about a party she went to. I repleyed that i want to right for the right girl and makes sure its right.She found it confusing and odd.....Im quite different from other guys to say the least
iNow Posted January 4, 2012 Posted January 4, 2012 Is there anyway in which i should try to help these friends and new friends? Are they aware of the dangers of these activities? Do they do it anyway? If so, then no. The only way you could help is if they truly weren't aware and you could educate them. However, I suspect strongly that they already know the potential harm, and have chosen to accept the risk. That's their choice. Stop trying to control what others do. It will only frustrate you. It worries me greatly that i can do little so wish to help people that i currently can is this a wise idea. I understand, but if I can make suggestion... As a general rule, you should try focusing your energy on helping those people who actually desire help, instead of continuing to bash your head against a wall trying to help people who don't want it. Volunteer. Tutor kids in subjects where you're strong. Read to the elderly, whatever. If you like to help, then help in ways where you aren't trying to make decisions for someone else, and help in ways that are directed to people who want it. It seems clear to me that these friends don't want your help. Given that, just make sure that you're always there for them and they can come to you safely and respectfully if they ever do. It has to be their choice to seek you out, not the other way around. In the meantime, forget about it and do something else... as hard as that may be.
Shawnus Posted January 6, 2012 Posted January 6, 2012 iNow is very correct in his answers Beast. Not everyone doing these things will be submitting to peer pressure. They could be friends as they have these similar desires to do these things. You persuasion will hold little appeal with people that have already have the information that could change their mind. One of my housemates is a large ethnic lady who persistently experiences (and makes vocal) her long run health issues, yet also continues to eat hugely inappropriate foods high in sugars and fats. We have suggested a change in diet, approaching it from a health and financial standpoint, but it falls on deaf ears. And she has just started her psychology degree! I am interested in observing if her studies will effect her behaviour Maybe I should record the results...
Beast Posted January 7, 2012 Author Posted January 7, 2012 Oh they are aware of the dangers.But do it anyway.. they basiuclly have the attuide off it will never happen to me scares the heck out of me.... Oh they are aware of the dangers.But do it anyway.. they basiuclly have the attuide off it will never happen to me scares the heck out of me.... heres a quote Oh and may i ask about the weed thing are you not worried about say for example one party going wrong? Nope? Its worth it
iNow Posted January 7, 2012 Posted January 7, 2012 Oh and may i ask about the weed thing are you not worried about say for example one party going wrong? It will often impact your motivation, and will generally prevent you from being the most ambitious person while under the influence... maybe temporarily prevent you from accomplishing things, but weed is generally pretty safe. It's not my intent to advocate drug use, just to let you know that your fear seems a bit excessive given the circumstances.
Beast Posted January 7, 2012 Author Posted January 7, 2012 Not just the point Its very common for people to go for cannabis to something worce http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/drugs/Pages/Cannabisdangers.aspx
iNow Posted January 7, 2012 Posted January 7, 2012 (edited) And it's also very common for people who start by drinking juice to move on to soda, and from soda to beer, and from beer to vodka... OMG!!! Outlaw juice immediately! Juice is the first step toward becoming a raging alcoholic lush! I know you mean well, but the "gateway drug" argument is senseless. I'm not advocating drug use. I'm advocating that you begin looking at them more realistically and educate yourself more. The sense I get from you is that you try to see the world in absolute terms... things are either good or they are bad... things are either evil or things are sacred. The world is not absolute in the way you seem to want it. Things are not black and white. We exist along a spectrum of many shades of gray, and what is dark to you may be light to another. If you disagree with the choice people make when they decide to smoke pot, or drink beer, or have sex or whatever else... that is perfectly okay. It's also okay that you disagree because you care about these people and do not want to see them hurt themselves. This is noble, kind, and a positive expression of your character as a human being. However, you hurt your character and make yourself look a bit like a fascist when you fail to realize that we are all free individuals who make our own choices, our own decisions, and may not always make the same choices you do. This is what freedom is all about. You would not like it if others tried to impose their beliefs and values on you, and I'm sure they don't like it when you try to do it to them. Relax. Take a deep breath. Find a way to live your life and stop worrying about everyone else and how they live theirs. Edited January 7, 2012 by iNow
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