Coral Rhedd Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 No' date=' don't trust strangers. Even family and friends can be suspect. If I were you, I would reveal as little information about yourself as possible online - where you live, name, pictures. It just isn't necessary and could cause problems.[/quote'] I very much agree with you John. I have wanted to mention this to her before. Bettina, I know you think you are cautious, but you are not.
Coral Rhedd Posted March 22, 2005 Posted March 22, 2005 I know' date=' but I don't want to go thru life being afraid....just cautious which I am. My dad told me what to do when approached, and what not to do. The last bunch of girls went willingly or without a struggle. I would kick him, bite him, and scream at the top of my lungs to draw attention, but I would never have gone with him. If there are other girls here, just remember. If you go....you die. Take a stand right where you are and fight. If you carry a cell phone, keep the gps tracking on all the time, not just for 911 calls. Bettina[/quote'] You don't want a situation to get to the point of your last paragraph. The truth is that you cannot know. Instead, make no assumptions. People you meet at the mall whom you don't know are all strangers. Even people your own age. Yes, you should listen to your instincts, but more than that you should realize some things about yourself and the way you present yourself. You come across as naive. Perhaps this is because you have had the protection of a loving father. Whatever the reason, take John's counsel, and Coquina's. Experience does have some advantages.
Bettina Posted March 22, 2005 Author Posted March 22, 2005 You don't want a situation to get to the point of your last paragraph. The truth is that you cannot know. Instead' date=' make no assumptions. People you meet at the mall whom you don't know are all strangers. Even people your own age. Yes, you should listen to your instincts, but more than that you should realize some things about yourself and the way you present yourself. You come across as naive. Perhaps this is because you have had the protection of a loving father. Whatever the reason, take John's counsel, and Coquina's. Experience does have some advantages.[/quote'] Aww...thanks for caring, but I'm not that naive. I notice you don't have any public profile. Why? Girls don't kill boys. It's sad that I don't know anything about you for example, your hobbies, interests, etc. Surely that kind of information would not be dangerous for you to list. Personally, I don't want to go thru life wearing a burka, and I don't want to diss people my own age because I don't already know them. How will I ever meet people and make new friends if I can't talk to them. You mentioned Coquina. Her profile describes her more than mine does me. She is beautiful too. What am I doing different. I want to know. My biggest worry is some student going ballistic. Thanks for caring..... Bettina
john5746 Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 You mentioned Coquina. Her profile describes her more than mine does me. She is beautiful too. What am I doing different. I want to know. My biggest worry is some student going ballistic. Thanks for caring..... Bettina In my earlier post, I was going to say, if you were my daughter... but I didn't want to be condecending. Coquina is an adult. I'm not trying to alarm you, just giving fatherly advice. Your friends are those that you know and see face to face. People on the net are just fragments.
j_p Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Although I disagree with you, I am not arguing with you. I do not mean to imply the prison system does a perfect job of protecting people. Or that all mistakes [cutting off healthy limbs] are forgiveable. I will not go off on reliability of evidence, and statistics about economic status and severity of punishment, and all those other arguments people will get into. That's not the issue. You are in serious pain over this; you really need help coming to terms with this beyond, 'There, there, honey, don't worry. We won't let the bad men get you.' My last post was intended NOT to comfort you [well, that was obvious], but to give you a few ideas for grappling with the issue of evil. BTW, you don't sound particularly naive or hyper-sensitive to me; you sound like you're too old to believe the pretty little lies adults tell children to make them feel safe, and that hurts at first. Bad things happen, good people suffer, and we all get sick about it.
Coral Rhedd Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 Aww...thanks for caring' date=' but I'm not that naive. I notice you don't have any public profile. Why? Girls don't kill boys. It's sad that I don't know anything about you for example, your hobbies, interests, etc. Surely that kind of information would not be dangerous for you to list.[/quote'] I am private by nature. I am private due to past circumstances of my life. Keeping my information completely private means I have great freedom to post. For instance, I was able to post about an event in my life that concerns my daughter and able to do so with absolutely no risk of violating her privacy. However, even were I to exchange emails with someone on this forum, that person would have to go to some trouble to trace me through my email. Since you seem to want to know something about me: I am a middle-aged woman. I am a writer of sorts by profession as well as someone who works for disabled people both on a professional and volunteer basis. When I go to church, I go to the Unitarian-Universalist Church or the Mastery of Life Center (which rather bores me with affirmations). I am a registered Democrat with a Libertarian background. As for hobbies, I am a reader. My favorite authors are Emily Bronte and F. Scott Fitzgerald. I am mildly interested in current events as long as I don't have to watch television to feel informed. The nick I use on this forum has absolutely no relevance to me personally in any way that would allow anyone to trace who I am. Oh yeah, one last thing, I am cautious by nature. Personally, I don't want to go thru life wearing a burka, and I don't want to diss people my own age because I don't already know them. How will I ever meet people and make new friends if I can't talk to them. It is not only young women but also young men who should be cautious about posting personal information on forums. You mentioned Coquina. Her profile describes her more than mine does me. She is beautiful too. What am I doing different. I want to know. I agree that Coquina is visually beautiful from her photograph, but I also suspect her of being a very beautiful person in her heart as well. She -- like each of us -- has the right to decide what she chooses to reveal about herself. Everyone who uses language reveals things. Often things they are not aware they are revealing. But language is also a tool of deceit and concealment. The internet is a wonderful, but you cannot know who you are dealing with. For instance, in this forum I respect their rules. I have only one user name. In another which has no such rules, just for fun, I have seven nicks. The writer in me got the better of me and I started creating nicks/personas -- including a hot to trot twenty-two year old male who was apparently so appealing I, to my shock, young women asking for my email address. Of course I demurred. The internet give us enormous freedom. We can be who we want to be. We project who we want to project. Like an actor taking on a role, if we create a persona, we become that persona to some extent. Pedophiles surf the net looking for "contacts." Middle-aged men surf the net pretending to be younger and looking for young women. However much you may wish to believe that someone you meet on the net is real, John is right; they are "fragments." About boys your age: The predatory pedophile picture in the link that began this thread is the exception not the rule. There are far more young pedophiles operating on a regular basis than there are old ones. Pedophilia-type behavior can begin in elementary school and escalates as the pedophile grows older peaking in the mid-twenties and early thirties. You might say they sort or go in training and begin to wear out a little over time as their libidos decline. The reason younger people are more often at risk is a matter of convience and empowerment for the pedophile. Pedophiles seem to want to assert power over some one who is approximate to their age when they themselves were sexually abused -- although not all pedophiles were abused. (There are a few female pedophiles as well but the general agreement seems to be that they are harder to detect.) If you are wise, you will never leave the mall with a boy you do not know well. As for beauty, it is very much has two sides to it, one advantageous and one hazardous. If you don't know that now, you will learn it. But that's a whole other thread. Regards, Coral
Bettina Posted March 23, 2005 Author Posted March 23, 2005 I am a middle-aged woman. Kool..... Geez..... for someone private, you sure talk a lot. I loved your post. I understand what you mean now about privacy for your daughter and I respect that. btw... I NEVER go with anyone other than the 4 friends I've always gone with. We may split up at the mall in two's, but we watch out for each other. We go home together. Thats our rule. Our parents all think the same, and we stay as a group. I never gave out my email on any forum, just to my school friends, my dads friend, and his work. I'm not allowed in chat rooms or instant messaging. I really wouldn't use them if I could anyway. I really live in a nice neighborhood, and have great friends. Thank You, and I'm still sick about Jessica. It's not a happy time for me. Bettina
Coral Rhedd Posted March 23, 2005 Posted March 23, 2005 btw... I NEVER go with anyone other than the 4 friends I've always gone with. We may split up at the mall in two's' date=' but we watch out for each other. We go home together. Thats our rule. Our parents all think the same, and we stay as a group. I never gave out my email on any forum, just to my school friends, my dads friend, and his work. I'm not allowed in chat rooms or instant messaging. I really wouldn't use them if I could anyway.[/quote'] Good. I am glad you are keeping safe. I really live in a nice neighborhood, and have great friends. Good. So do a lot of pedophiles. I believe the stats are that there is one for every 1/2 sq. mile in the US. I assure you they do not all look like the guy who killed Jessica. They have every conceivable interest to fit in and be considered trustworthy people. I'm still sick about Jessica. It's not a happy time for me. I know. About fifteen years or so ago a girl was murdered by her parents, who were abusing her. Her photo was everywhere and there were good reasons why her death could have been prevented. Her name was Lisa Steinberg. I was quite sad and haunted by her for a while. So I do understand some of your feelings.
Bettina Posted March 24, 2005 Author Posted March 24, 2005 Good. I am glad you are keeping safe. Good. So do a lot of pedophiles. I believe the stats are that there is one for every 1/2 sq. mile in the US. I assure you they do not all look like the guy who killed Jessica. They have every conceivable interest to fit in and be considered trustworthy people. I know. About fifteen years or so ago a girl was murdered by her parents' date=' who were abusing her. Her photo was everywhere and there were good reasons why her death could have been prevented. Her name was Lisa Steinberg. I was quite sad and haunted by her for a while. So I do understand some of your feelings.[/quote'] A long time ago a doctor told my dad that I was an "empath of the worst kind" and sent me to another doctor, then to another. I've been ignoring this for a long time because I see other girls cry too and figured it to be a trait among us women. I rather have used the hyper-sensitive issue to discuss what I am instead of empath. I disliked the word empath because some tie it in with the ability to read other peoples thoughts. Believe me, I not only can't, but I believe its pure bull. I'm beginning to embrace the fact that the doctor was right and I've been kidding myself all along. I'm an empath and I've begun looking into forums dealing with this and found people like me. Some of these forums tie in the mind reading thing and I skip those parts. I just want facts, not fiction. The reason I went so ballistic about Jessica, is that I KNEW what she went thru. I FELT what she felt. I like the word you used.....haunting.....thats what it is, day and night. Her death played vividly in my head like a movie to the point that I almost threw up a few times. This is what it does to you. Oh, they tried sedatives and some other pills, but all those did was make me sleep. People who are not emotional seem to be less sympathetic to the victim and more sympathetic to the criminal. The victim is dead, so why waste time on that. We must try to save the criminal from death. Geez...even the last words spoken by a Judge to this Courey monster said "I wish you luck". Why would he say something like that. It doesn't make any sense. Well, thanks for your input, and I can tell when someone is being "overly nice", but thankfully, haven't seen it in my neighborhood. Again, I don't like going thru life being afraid....Maybe I need a boyfriend. I already have my eye on one though he's younger. Bettina
coquina Posted March 24, 2005 Posted March 24, 2005 for the compliments - they made my day, since I'll be 56 on Friday. I think I'm on the far side of "middle-aged", scary thought. My internet service has been on the Fritz all day long - this is the first time I've been able to connect. Hope it hangs in there long enough for me to reply. Bettina, I have the opposite problem from you when it comes to crying. My dad believed that to succeed in this world, one couldn't show emotion. He believed in "spare the rod and spoil the child" to the max. He used to say, "If you don't stop crying, I will give you something to cry about." My mother was a Brit and had the "stiff upper lip" thing. She didn't believe in showing your emotions to anyone. I learned to "suck it up", big-time. As a result, very few people have ever seen me cry. I didn't even cry when my husband died. People kept telling me, "You have to cry," but I just couldn't. People also think I don't care because of my lack of physical emotions, but I do. You say you have been diagnosed as an "empath". I know the word "empathy", but didn't know there was a name for someone who feels the emotion in the extreme. It is certainly good that you care so much for others. However, I think you need to channel those emotions into a way that you can help them. Have you ever thought about becoming a lawyer. You could be a darned convincing prosecuting attorney. However, you have to remember to channel the anger and emotion rather than allowing it to overwhelm you.
BenSon Posted March 24, 2005 Posted March 24, 2005 Bettina, I have the opposite problem from you when it comes to crying. My dad believed that to succeed in this world, one couldn't show emotion. He believed in "spare the rod and spoil the child" to the max. He used to say, "If you don't stop crying, I will give you something to cry about." My mother was a Brit and had the "stiff upper lip" thing. She didn't believe in showing your emotions to anyone. I learned to "suck it up", big-time. As a result, very few people have ever seen me cry. I didn't even cry when my husband died. People kept telling me, "You have to cry," but I just couldn't. People also think I don't care because of my lack of physical emotions, but I do. I think the Paul McCartney best summed up not letting your emotions rule...Hope theres some Beatles fans in this thread "For well you know that it’s a fool who plays it cool By making his world a little colder." -Hey Jude ~Scott
Bettina Posted March 24, 2005 Author Posted March 24, 2005 for the compliments - they made my day' date=' since I'll be 56 on Friday. I think I'm on the far side of "middle-aged", scary thought. My internet service has been on the Fritz all day long - this is the first time I've been able to connect. Hope it hangs in there long enough for me to reply. Bettina, I have the opposite problem from you when it comes to crying. My dad believed that to succeed in this world, one couldn't show emotion. He believed in "spare the rod and spoil the child" to the max. He used to say, "If you don't stop crying, I will give you something to cry about." My mother was a Brit and had the "stiff upper lip" thing. She didn't believe in showing your emotions to anyone. I learned to "suck it up", big-time. As a result, very few people have ever seen me cry. I didn't even cry when my husband died. People kept telling me, "You have to cry," but I just couldn't. People also think I don't care because of my lack of physical emotions, but I do. You say you have been diagnosed as an "empath". I know the word "empathy", but didn't know there was a name for someone who feels the emotion in the extreme. It is certainly good that you care so much for others. However, I think you need to channel those emotions into a way that you can help them. Have you ever thought about becoming a lawyer. You could be a darned convincing prosecuting attorney. However, you have to remember to channel the anger and emotion rather than allowing it to overwhelm you.[/quote'] This is me.....I'm tired of ignoring it....I knew when I sang in church on Christmas that I couldn't ignore it anymore. It keeps getting worse. http://www.geocities.com/christabelle67/TheEmpathReport101PtI.html Empaths are sensitive to TV, videos, movies, news and broadcasts. Violence or emotional dramas depicting shocking scenes of physical or emotional pain inflicted on adults, children or animals can bring an empath easily to tears. At times, they may feel physically ill or choke back the tears. Some empaths will struggle to comprehend any such cruelty, and mayl have grave difficulty in expressing themselves in the face of another’s ignorance, closed-mindedness and obvious lack of compassion. They simply cannot justify the suffering they feel and see. As far as being a lawyer, I would get kicked out when I attacked the lawyer defending a monster, so it wouldn't work out. I'm still looking for a good forum for this. Bettina
BenSon Posted March 24, 2005 Posted March 24, 2005 That is realy interesting i wasn't aware that this sort of thing can lead to psychics! do you ever think you know what other people are thinking? This is me.....I'm tired of ignoring it....I knew when I sang in church on Christmas that I couldn't ignore it anymore. It keeps getting worse. If you don't mind me asking what happened to u at christmas? ~Scott
6431hoho Posted April 10, 2005 Posted April 10, 2005 how do you know if someone wants to die or live? they can just use this strategy to choose if they wanna live.
klanger Posted April 10, 2005 Posted April 10, 2005 I have uhhhmed and ahhhed about this very subject every time something comes to the news about the death penalty. I have to say I dont agree with it. Not that I am a do gooder, but just that as I see it that makes us no better, they arnt executed in the heat of the moment it is pure cold blood. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, and I start to wonder who is the animal/monster. I dont believe I am a do gooder for feeling and thinking this way, simply cos if I had my way prison's would not be the free for all holiday camps that they are today. I believe they should bring back the chain gangs, tax payers are already paying for their food and water, why shouldnt they work that off and cover the costs to tax payers for road maintenance. They shouldnt have any leasure persuits, get the gyms out of prison along with the colour tvs and all the other niceties that the free dont always have to hand. I dont think they should be bullied or beaten by the staff, but I also dont think they should have an easy laid back time in prison either. After all they are there as a punishment. Who knows, maybe if prisons were a horrible place to be maybe so many people would think twice about commiting the crimes in the first place.
Ophiolite Posted April 10, 2005 Posted April 10, 2005 I am a do gooder. Can't say I see what's reprehensible about doing good. If I were ever to find myself in a prison system such as you advocate, then, regardless of my guilt, when I got out I would be determined to make society pay for what they had done to me. And I'm quite a nice guy really. I can only speculate how it would piss off the hardened criminals and sociopaths.
Macroscopic Posted April 11, 2005 Posted April 11, 2005 If I were ever to find myself in a prison system such as you advocate, then, regardless of my guilt, when I got out I would be determined to make society pay for what they had done to me. And I'm quite a nice guy really. I can only speculate how it would piss off the hardened criminals and sociopaths. Which is why the system described should only be for the people there for life. Then that wouldn't be a problem.
Bettina Posted April 11, 2005 Author Posted April 11, 2005 When I started this thread, I classified people into three types, and started an argument. This was my first forum and I had a lot to learn. I got yelled at a few times, (rightfully so) chastised by my dad (again rightfully so), and had my ideas stepped on too but now I'm learning to tolerate the opinion of others when it disagrees with mine. However, I've also learned not to back down unless someone offers proof that contradicts my opinion, and in the case of the three classes.....good....evil....and monsters, I will keep my original opinion. This thread got heated when a little 9 year old girl got stolen from her bedroom, sexually tortured for over two days, then when he was finished satisfying himself, he strangled her with a rope. The latest news from this man says that he told police that he buried her alive. Well, this has set me off again and I'm at a new depressed low. I feel sick. Where am I going with this? Nowhere. It just makes me feel better to know that my classification of this person as a monster is correct (IMO) and deserves the death penalty, and no matter how many posters, though I respect their feelings on the death penalty, and those who wish to save him, It is my humble opinion as a human being, that I wish this person to pay the ultimate price. I wish this person dead with all my heart. A slow burn in the electric chair would make me feel wonderful. I would love it if they would invite me to see it because the last thing he would see would be me holding up that little girls photo. Whats funny is that I am empathic to every living thing. I feel pain when others feel pain, I cry when others cry, and I cried for her, but I would feel nothing for this monster. Not one tear would leave my eye. I accept what your all thinking about me, because I know there are millions of people who think like I do about this man, and for that I feel good. My classmates feel that too.... Bettina
6431hoho Posted April 11, 2005 Posted April 11, 2005 Even if this person did this crime hundread, thousand or million times, if we have a way to punish them (just like death penalty), and make the community safer (just like death penalty), then we should use that method. I feel that the person should work for what he eats and lives. Also, earn money for the victim's familes. But that's another story...
Bettina Posted April 16, 2005 Author Posted April 16, 2005 RUSKIN, Fla. - Police said Saturday they believe they have found the body of a missing 13-year-old girl, who disappeared from her home around the time a registered sex offender unexpectedly paid a visit. Another monster let go by authorities. The repeat registered sex offender. I've written a letter and sent it to my congressmen demanding that they keep us safe by locking these people up for good. There is no cure for this type of person no matter what physcologists think. I'm beginning to question mine too. No need to reply, just venting. Bettina
Dak Posted April 17, 2005 Posted April 17, 2005 [about a paedophile'] I wish this person dead with all my heart. A slow burn in the electric chair would make me feel wonderful. so you would derive pleasure from the suffering and death of another human? and before you brush him off as 'not human', he is human, albeit an extremely unpleasant one. i would imagine he had a similar attitude towards his victim as you do to him, ie "who cares if this person suffers? i dont. hel, im even going to enjoy watching her/him suffer". and as much as you can 'justify' it by saying he had done something to deserve it whereas the child had not, by wishing a 'slow burn' upon him you're wishing a prolongation of his pain for your personal pleasure, a desire which does little to differentiate yourself from him. i appologise whole-heartedly if any of that caused offence -- it was not my intention to do so -- but i just wanted to point out the hypocracy of your views. personally, i agree that he should die. im all for mersy and giving another chance, but someone that inherintly evil... as long as there's no doubt as to his guilt, then i think that he should be killed. someone like that has no rite to live, even in a prison... but i also think that his murder should be as clinical and painless as possible. in some cases its appropriate to fight fire with fire, but to respond to a 'monstor' by becoming one yourself? i think that would be the worst thing that we could do, and it would sicken me were he torchered thus simply to sate the blood-lust of the people who are sickened by his acts.
Flareon Posted April 17, 2005 Posted April 17, 2005 personally' date=' i agree that he should die. im all for mersy and giving another chance, but someone [i']that[/i] inherintly evil... as long as there's no doubt as to his guilt, then i think that he should be killed. someone like that has no rite to live, even in a prison... but i also think that his murder should be as clinical and painless as possible. in some cases its appropriate to fight fire with fire, but to respond to a 'monstor' by becoming one yourself? i think that would be the worst thing that we could do, and it would sicken me were he torchered thus simply to sate the blood-lust of the people who are sickened by his acts. Very good point. Nietzsche would agree. I think hangings, death by firing squads, and death electric shock are quite barbaric, and it's disturbing that they are still legal in some states.
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