girl boss, non white guy boss

[randomc]

I've had bosses from several demographics, and the one i couldn't click with was the female kurd, and it wasn't because she was kurdish.

 

So what do you think of me?

[iNow]

I think you're looking for a pattern where one almost certainly doesn't exist; forgetting that people are people and individual differences are far more significant than any man made arbitrary labels of gender, skin color, or country of origin.

[randomc]

Stop that abstracting.

 

I have a problem with female bosses. I'm going to have some, what do i do?

[iNow]

Grow up and get your head out of your ass.

I have a problem with female bosses. I'm going to have some, what do i do?

[randomc]

come on, inow, this is a problem for a lot of men, competition with a women feels wrong, right?

 

This isn't a trivial thing.

[iNow]

See previous comment

[randomc]

There's conversation to be had here. You are a very sexy and adaquate modern man, and this is good. But being a sexy and adaquate modern man is hard to be, and given that workplaces are very socially complicated now, less adaquate men deserve a hearing, surely.

 

ok, i enjoy competition in general, but competing with women isn't the same.

 

So i have to adjust to enjoying this. I can't be arsed trying to enjoy this. I mean, you enjoy something or you don't.

Edited April 4, 2015 by randomc

[hypervalent_iodine]

come on, inow, this is a problem for a lot of men, competition with a women feels wrong, right?

 

This isn't a trivial thing.

 

Only if you view your female colleagues as being somehow different in their ability to do their job to your male ones (or to yourself). Is this the case? You haven't really outlined what your problem with your boss is / was.

[randomc]

I think it was just her style... she was what... passive aggressive becomes when you give it authority? I've come across guys like that (phi, for eg) who have been my boss but they don't piss me off to the same extent.

 

inows see previous comment is where this has to end....

Edited April 4, 2015 by randomc

[hypervalent_iodine]

I think it was just her style... she was what... passive aggressive becomes when you give it authority? I've come across guys like that (phi, for eg) who have been my boss but they don't piss me off to the same extent.

 

Emphasis mine.

 

It seems like the problem is with you and not with them.

[randomc]

well i know that. the question is how does male competitiveness fit into that? to the extent that you'll allow it to exist (i'd like you to, because it makes life fun for me)

[hypervalent_iodine]

well i know that. the question is how does male competitiveness fit into that? to the extent that you'll allow it to exist (i'd like you to, because it makes life fun for me)

 

 

Fit into what, exactly? You're not doing a stellar job of outlining what your point is here. Are you trying to ask how male competitiveness fits into your feelings towards female colleagues vs. your male ones? I'm not sure that it does. However, I think sexist preconceptions certainly do.

[randomc]

But that's quite an extreme form of feminism, isn't it? Like, you can't be arsed to deal with masculinity and so just stomp on it during education (implied by your use of "preconception" here).

[hypervalent_iodine]

But that's quite an extreme form of feminism, isn't it? Like, you can't be arsed to deal with masculinity and so just stomp on it during education (implied by your use of "preconception" here).

 

What? My use of the word preconception comes from the part where you claimed that you are annoyed by females with certain traits being your boss, but not males with the same traits.

[randomc]

we're getting toward see previous comment territory now... but male competitiveness doesnt want to compete with women. It's not my attitude, it's my biology (approximatley, but still definitively, in my case)

Edited April 4, 2015 by randomc

[hypervalent_iodine]

we're getting toward see previous comment territory now... but male competitiveness doesnt want to compete with women. It's not my attitude, it's my biology (approximatley, but still definitively, in my case)

 

Actually, we're getting into cite your sources / back up your claims with evidence territory.

[randomc]

Biological evidence that men don't want to compete with women?

 

I mean i'll go and look... what will you accept? it's obviously going to need to be hugely aggregative, so the social sciences are a waste of time...any suggestions?

Edited April 4, 2015 by randomc

[hypervalent_iodine]

Biological evidence that men don't want to compete with women?

 

I mean i'll go and look... what will you accept? it's obviously going to need to be hugely aggregative, so the social sciences are a waste of time...any suggestions?

 

Scientific evidence that such a claim is based in reality and not just in your head.

[randomc]

so a reprieve from biological evidence.... thats a good thing

[hypervalent_iodine]

so a reprieve from biological evidence.... thats a good thing

 

Is this you saying that you have no evidence? The rules happen to require it, so you would do well to provide it or this thread may end up closed.

[randomc]

Look, delicate social dynamics such as this are capable of affecting the productivity of entire nations. I'm not capable of parsing the literature of mulitple fields that might anwer your question, but i resent the closing down of it in such a back hand way. Shame on you

[hypervalent_iodine]

Look, delicate social dynamics such as this are capable of affecting the productivity of entire nations. I'm not capable of parsing the literature of mulitple fields that might anwer your question, but i resent the closing down of it in such a back hand way. Shame on you

 

Shame on me? You're the one making ridiculous statements with undercurrents of sexism here. All I'm asking you for is some evidence to support the central premise of your claim. If you can't do that or if you haven't already, then how can you expect anyone to take what you're saying seriously?

[randomc]

But i haven't provided a damn shred of evidence and i've already moved you from "sexist preconceptions" to "undercurrents of sexism". How does evidence enter into this discussion, exactly? I mean, it'd be great if ti did, but a cursory glance shows that anything less than a comprehensive comparison of all the fields which can be taken seriously on this point is going to fall short. So what's inferior in this context about asserting that men don't like competing with women as common sense?

[hypervalent_iodine]

Evidence enters into it when you make claims such as, 'men don't like competing with women.' If you make statements like that, you need to be able to back them up with evidence. If you can't, then your premise and the ideas that you draw from it have no basis.

[ajb]

I understand where randomc is coming from, but part of being in the workplace is getting along to the extent that the job can be done. This is irrespective of your personal views and ideologies. You may even by law be required to leave such things 'at the door'.

 

Whoever pisses you off, pisses you off and you have the right to not like everyone for any reason you see fit. You just need to let it wash over you as best you can and do your job. If the situation becomes intolerable then you should seek advice from seniors at the workplace. Beware, saying 'cos she is a girl' is unlikely to get you very far (there maybe very specific roles where this could matter, but not generally).

 

So on that, what is your job?