I have poor communication skills...

[Mr Rayon]

I have poor communication skills.

 

How can I improve my communication skills so that I can improve the quality of my life?

[StringJunky]

Try posting here, in an involved way more often, and consciously think about how you are being received by the style and content of responses. Online writing gives you the opportunity to reflect and analyse recorded conversations you've had. This should, eventually, have a positive impact on your spoken dialogue with people. It's about learning to get a reciprocal flow going in exchanges with people, that seems to have its own momentum. Speak in such a way that it requires a response from the other person i.e. leave your spoken words open to be added to by them. Speaking in monosyllabic answers and closed sentences is very hard for the other person to keep adding to.

 

Also, remember it takes two to Tango, so, it's not always your fault when conversation dries up.

Edited May 4, 2015 by StringJunky

[MonDie]

whoops!

---

 

Accidentally posted, but whatever.

 

That may depend on the symptoms. Not to go on a tangent, but there is evidence that communication deficits may have various underlying causes. Deficits such as "alogia" and "odd speech" were initially used as indicators of schizophrenia, yet similar symptoms are also present in the autism spectrum conditions (ASCs), which new evidence suggests are diametrically opposed to schizphrenia. Schizophrenia appears to be closer to the mood disorders etiologically. The gist is that different people have different communication deficits for different reasons.

Edited May 4, 2015 by MonDie

[ajb]

Without knowing specifics, I would say 'slow down'. Take your time to think about what you want to say/write and how to say/write it. Give the receiver time to understand what you have said. Try your best to think about the level of your audience and pick suitable language.

 

Do you have some specific situations in mind here?

[Phi for All]

In my experience, with speech anyway, most people who communicate poorly aren't listening to what's being said to them. They're thinking about their response to what's already been said. They're usually a bit paranoid about not having the proper thing to say when it's their "turn" in the conversation. They listen with half their attention and formulate the next part of what they're going to say with the other half.

 

Of course, often the person talking to them has moved on from what was being said previously, so by the time the poor communicator gets his chance to speak, he's way behind the flow of conversation. This adds to the poor communication, as well as the paranoia.

 

Trust yourself to be able to respond properly in the moment, without preparing your replies a few seconds in advance. It's better to have a few seconds pause between answers than to respond to the wrong thing. Listening should be more than half of all communication.

[GeoChair]

Are you shy? Do you have social anxiety? I think it helps to know what causes you to freeze up in social settings first.

[ajb]

Are you shy? Do you have social anxiety?

I think a lot of scientists suffer with this. I will confess that I am not always the best at coming forward when things are being discussed. However, you have to recognise it and push past it. Being able to communicate is important.

[Phi for All]

"Some people have a way with words, and others... not have way." -- Steve Martin