What is a pedophile?

[Coral Rhedd]

I am wondering how people view pedophiles and child sexual abusers.

 

Do you think they are insane?

Do you think they are repeating a cycle of abuse?

Could pedophilia simply be another sexual preference?

 

Here is a link I found that is quite educational:

 

http://www.darkness2light.org/faq/faqs_2.asp

 

However, please understand that many of these people don't actually think they are doing something wrong. Some believe they are liberating children to express their sexual feelings.

 

I think they are exploiting children. Because we do not know how to truly treat them, I think they should be identified early and isolated from the general population. This would mean a form of incarceration for offenders that are relatively young.

 

What are your thoughts on who these people are and how we can identify and help them while protecting children?

[Bettina]

I am wondering how people view pedophiles and child sexual abusers.

 

Do you think they are insane?

Do you think they are repeating a cycle of abuse?

Could pedophilia simply be another sexual preference?

 

Here is a link I found that is quite educational:

 

http://www.darkness2light.org/faq/faqs_2.asp

 

However' date=' please understand that many of these people don't actually think they are doing something wrong. Some believe they are liberating children to express their sexual feelings.

 

I think they are exploiting children. Because we do not know how to truly treat them, I think they should be identified early and isolated from the general population. This would mean a form of incarceration for offenders that are relatively young.

 

What are your thoughts on who these people are and how we can identify and help them while protecting children?[/quote']

 

Before this thread gets closed, my answer is sexual preference, and if caught just once, should never be released from prison. If the child is murdered, then the death sentence should be mandatory......

 

You asked.......

 

Bettina

[Dave]

My own personal opinion is that these people have severe mental health problems and are extremely misguided. I do believe they just need to be segregated from society - Bettina's opinion of them is rather a good example of why.

 

Other than that... what else is there to say?

 

(Well, rather a lot I would imagine, but I don't think I'm in a position to say anything of great value).

[Coral Rhedd]

My own personal opinion is that these people have severe mental health problems and are extremely misguided. I do believe they just need to be segregated from society - Bettina's opinion of them is rather a good example of why.

 

Other than that... what else is there to say?

 

(Well' date=' rather a lot I would imagine, but I don't think I'm in a position to say anything of great value).[/quote']

 

Okay. What particular mental health problem do you think they have?

[Coral Rhedd]

Before this thread gets closed' date=' my answer is sexual preference, and if caught just once, should never be released from prison. If the child is murdered, then the death sentence should be mandatory......

 

You asked.......

 

Bettina[/quote']

 

And I knew I could depend upon you to comment. But if theirs is a genuine sexual preference, can we speculate whether or not it is truly chosen? For instance people with sexual interests in adults of the opposite or same sex could argue that that is their preference. But is it really?

[Bettina]

And I knew I could depend upon you to comment. But if theirs is a genuine sexual preference, can we speculate whether or not it is truly chosen[/b']? For instance people with sexual interests in adults of the opposite or same sex could argue that that is their preference. But is it really?

Yes and No.....In adults, both parties are participating. In the Pedophile, one is innocent. Thats how this slime usually wins over his victim.

 

My own personal opinion is that these people have severe mental health problems and are extremely misguided. I do believe they just need to be segregated from society - Bettina's opinion of them is rather a good example of why.

 

Other than that... what else is there to say?

 

(Well' date=' rather a lot I would imagine, but I don't think I'm in a position to say anything of great value).[/quote']

 

I have to be good here, but since you mentioned my name, I have to reply. So my comment is that your wrong. Even convicts who are allready removed from society want to kill them too. I'm thankful I'm in the majority.

 

Bettina

[Dave]

I have to be good here, but since you mentioned my name, I have to reply. So my comment is that your wrong. Even convicts who are allready removed from society want to kill them too. I'm thankful I'm in the majority.

 

My personal opinion is that the death penalty is an outdated, barbaric and downright backwards sentence that is not fit to be implemented in a modern judicial system. Obviously you disagree. I don't want to drag this thread into a debate about the death penalty; there's already far too many threads on the subject already.

 

As for your other comment... well, I will refrain from posting my personal opinion on that in this forum. This thread is supposed to be about posting peoples' opinion of a paedophile, and I suppose you've shown that already.

[coquina]

From your original link:

We do know that most sex offenders are known to their victim and to the victim's family. Most sex offenders are more alike than different from the general population. We know that most sex offenders are not the "dirty old man in the bushes" who jumps out and grabs kids. Most sex offender's work hard to have private access to children and then spend time gaining the trust of the child and the child's caregivers. Sex offenders are represented in every socioeconomic, ethnic, religious and racial group. Sex offenders may be older children or adults who meet their emotional and sexual and power needs at the expense of children.

 

The part I put in bold rules out insanity as defined by statute. They know what they are doing is wrong, and they plot to do it.

 

Perhaps you would categorize a pedophile as a type of sociopath. As I recall, serial killers often fit in the communtiy quite well also. What do you think of the definition, "Pedophiles are sociopaths who prey on children."?

[Bettina]

As for your other comment... well, I will refrain from posting my personal opinion on that in this forum. This thread is supposed to be about posting peoples' opinion of a paedophile, and I suppose you've shown that already.

 

This comment?

 

Yes and No.....In adults, both parties are participating. In the Pedophile, one is innocent. Thats how this slime usually wins over his victim.

 

Bettina

 

Edit: I suppose in every court there are pedohile rights supporters.

[Bettina]

I'm sorry Dave

I'm not picking on you personally.

 

Bettina

[MolecularMan14]

My friend has just finished a book report about a book called "Lolita" on the topic; one might look into it

[Coral Rhedd]

My friend has just finished a book report about a book called "Lolita" on the topic; one might look into it

 

I had to read it in graduate studies. It gives an interesting view of a pedophile's mind set. Note that he is quite enamoured with his "Lo" but that he loses sight of who she is. She becomes his object and not a person in her own right.

 

What is interesting about Humbert Humbert (the pedophile) is that he goes through the exact process of grooming his target that real pedophiles do.

 

If, in a criminal trial, the prosecuting attorney by means of expert testimony can establish intent, then the legal definition of insanity does not apply. When a pedophile grooms potential victims by means of gifts, entertainment, and exposure to movies or other media inappropriate for children of that he is not only using a form of bribery, but the inappropriate media can be used to elicit guilt in the child and that guilt can be used as wedge or a threat.

 

So Sandi is dead on about the issue of how the law establishes sanity. Planning and an insanity defense do not go together.

[Exordium]

I am wondering how people view pedophiles and child sexual abusers.

 

Do you think they are insane?

Do you think they are repeating a cycle of abuse?

Could pedophilia simply be another sexual preference?

 

 

My apologies for the empty message above this one.

 

My answers to your question are: unvalid question, yes, no.

 

I believe that pehdphilia is a mental illness, yes, but pedophiles aren't insane in the sense that they don't know what they are doing, or do not understand that it is wrong.

 

All child abusers have themselves suffered chronic and systematic abuse themselves as children. That is the only way to produce a pedophile. There is no genetic code for it -- people don't become pehophiles "naturally".

 

Finally, I don't think pedophilia is a sexual act, it's an act of violence, like rape.

 

Can pedophiles be treated? Usually not. In a psychotherapy the patient must be a participant in the treatment, not a recipient of it. But most pedophiles are only willing to undergo treatment to minimize the consequences of their actions, and to be able to repeat them as soon as possible.

 

What to do with them? I'm tempted to say that 9mm of hot lead to the back of the neck would be the easiest, cheapest, quickest and the most efficient solution. But I'll go with incarreration until the late middle age, when most pedophiles lose their urges.

[Coral Rhedd]

Yes and No.....In adults, both parties are participating. In the Pedophile, one is innocent.

 

Actually one is innocent even if participating. The myth of the seductive child is long dead. Educators have established that most children between the ages of six and the onset of puberty don't think about sex much. But they can be persuaded to participate in their own exploitation by a clever adult. If that adult is a youth leader or a teacher or someone else who the child admires, that adult already has a big advantage in obtaining the child's cooperation.

[Coral Rhedd]

My apologies for the empty message above this one.

 

My answers to your question are: unvalid question' date=' yes, no.

 

I believe that pehdphilia is a mental illness, yes, but pedophiles aren't insane in the sense that they don't know what they are doing, or do not understand that it is wrong.

[/quote']

 

I agree. In that sense, and particularly by most definitions in law, they are usually not insane.

 

All child abusers have themselves suffered chronic and systematic abuse themselves as children. That is the only way to produce a pedophile. There is no genetic code for it -- people don't become pehophiles "naturally".

 

Yes, to the abuse probably, but the abuse suffered by them is not always sexual abuse. Recently there was a study in which many sexual abusers who claimed they were sexually abused as children recanted when faced with a polygraph test.

 

Finally, I don't think pedophilia is a sexual act, it's an act of violence, like rape.

 

Knowing this, you no doubt also know about power rapists. An adult is, by virtue of being an adult, more powerful than a child. I think power is more often the motive but that sex and violence can be the one of the payoffs as well. I have come to disagree with the traditional feminist accessment (which I used to hold) that rape is all about violence. I think it is more complex than that. In a strange sort of way, I think child sexual abuse is often about payback. I think it is hardly a coincidence that so many abusers choose victims who are the same age as the abuser was when he/she felt most victimized. My theory is that the abuse is a reinactment of sorts.

 

Can pedophiles be treated? Usually not. In a psychotherapy the patient must be a participant in the treatment, not a recipient of it. But most pedophiles are only willing to undergo treatment to minimize the consequences of their actions, and to be able to repeat them as soon as possible.

 

Agreed. But why do they not want to change? So many other criminals can be rehabilitated. Why can't they?

 

What to do with them? I'm tempted to say that 9mm of hot lead to the back of the neck would be the easiest, cheapest, quickest and the most efficient solution. But I'll go with incarreration until the late middle age, when most pedophiles lose their urges.

 

Would you agree to imprisoning juvenile offenders? Often this behavior begins at puberty. It is almost untreatable then as well. Yet we let juvenile offenders go when they are 18 despite the fact that, if they are not caught, they will have many many years to prey upon children,

[mustang292]

Originally posted by Exordium: All child abusers have themselves suffered chronic and systematic abuse themselves as children.

 

If that were truly the case then, it could all be traced back to just one person who started it all. And then who did it to him?

 

Maybe you should say Most instead of All.

 

And by the way, a friend mentioned to me the other day that he was getting angry with foreigners because he has seen so many arrested for sex offenses with children. After talking about it for awhile, we came to the conclusion that for many of them, they have been brought up to believe that young teenage girls get married at like 13 in their countries, and they haven't learned our laws are different yet.

 

By the way, Nature says that a girl having a period is her beginning for child bearing. Yet, as a society, we have decided that 18 is the age now. Why? Because, look at a 13 year olds thought process, its called immature. They don't know what they want and with our educational process an 18 year old can have much more knowledge about the decisions they want to make.

 

LOL, I just recapped what I just wrote and it sounds like I was talking in circles. Oh well, I'm not a psychologist. Just throwing stuff out there to be contemplated.

[Coral Rhedd]

If that were truly the case then' date=' it could all be traced back to just one person who started it all. And then who did it to him?

 

Maybe you should say Most instead of All.

 

And by the way, a friend mentioned to me the other day that he was getting angry with foreigners because he has seen so many arrested for sex offenses with children. After talking about it for awhile, we came to the conclusion that for many of them, they have been brought up to believe that young teenage girls get married at like 13 in their countries, and they haven't learned our laws are different yet.

 

By the way, Nature says that a girl having a period is her beginning for child bearing. Yet, as a society, we have decided that 18 is the age now. Why? Because, look at a 13 year olds thought process, its called immature. They don't know what they want and with our educational process an 18 year old can have much more knowledge about the decisions they want to make.

 

LOL, I just recapped what I just wrote and it sounds like I was talking in circles. Oh well, I'm not a psychologist. Just throwing stuff out there to be contemplated.[/quote']

 

It is a puzzle to me why a grown man would be sexually interested in a 13 year old in the first place. Anyone care to shed some light?

[mustang292]

It depends on their development. If she has Full breasts and such. Some of them look freakin' 20 years old if their parents let them wear make up!

 

Breasts are evolutions way of getting a man to be attracted to a woman. It's quite simple.

 

It is society's responsibility to realize the difference.

 

Secondly, I just want to add how mad I am when I see parents let their young teenagers run around in make up, padded braws and tight shorts that say stupid things like Precious on them.

 

I have a 2-year old daughter, and I will NEVER let her do something like that until she is 17-18 when I decide she knows how to make her own decisions.

 

These parents who do that are just asking for their children to be stalked and taken. That Pisses me off! Learn some Freakin' Responsibility!

[Skye]

With the decision making maturity, I don't know many adults that haven't made poor decisions in their love lives.

[Coral Rhedd]

It depends on their development. If she has Full breasts and such. Some of them look freakin' 20 years old if their parents let them wear make up!

 

Breasts are evolutions way of getting a man to be attracted to a woman. It's quite simple.

 

You have me a little confused. There is not much that can be done about breasts. Binding them would be sort of archaic. Is it the breasts or the makeup that are the main problem?

[Coral Rhedd]

With the decision making maturity, I don't know many adults that haven't made poor decisions in their love lives.

 

Certainly. Getting married at nineteen was my own personal worst one. But making poor decisions in mutual adult relationships and grown men having sex with thirteen year old girls don't seem to rival each other in my mind.

 

Maybe its a guy thing, but as a woman, I can certainly tell the difference between a thirteen year old girl with make up and an eighteen year old one. It is a little hard for me to understand how such mistakes can be made.

[mustang292]

I am going to assume you are female (Coral Rhedd). So maybe I should try and explain it to you differently.

 

You see a male walking passed you. He is 6 foot tall looks like he works out has facial hair nicely cropped, dressed to the nines (your thinkin he's 20ish) and check him out while he passes you. You turn to your friend and say "He's Hot!" your friend says, "That's my next door neighbor he is only 13.

 

I give up if this doesn't work for you. I don't know how to explain it in any more detail than I did before.

 

If someone else understands what I'm saying please put it in better words for Coral to understand.

 

Thanks.

[Hellbender]

Do you think they are insane?

 

I am not sure. The more famous cases seem to range from completely nuts to merely wierd. Whether this is the deviation or the norm is hard to tell, as mundane cases are less likely to be as sensationalistic.

 

Do you think they are repeating a cycle of abuse?

 

Perhaps, in some cases this may be, but it seems that some cases are also brought on by a genuine sexual attraction towards children.

 

Could pedophilia simply be another sexual preference?

 

It could be another sexual preference in some cases, and I am for the tolerance of alternate sexual preference, but the fact is that one side (the child) is being victimized, and even in the improbable chance that they go along with it, they cannot legally consent to sex anyway. Pedophilia is inherently unlawful and predatory because of this.

 

However, please understand that many of these people don't actually think they are doing something wrong. Some believe they are liberating children to express their sexual feelings.

 

I find that people can somehow justify anything wrong if they want to. To them it may be okay, but that doesn't make it correct to victimize children as such.

 

I think they are exploiting children. Because, we do not know how to truly treat them. I think they should be identified early and isolated from the general population. This would mean a form of incarceration for offenders that are relatively young.

 

I agree with this, but it presents a whole slew of ethical and practical problems. The same should be done with serial killers, who clearly are insane in most cases, but it hasn't, and isolating pedophiles would likely present similar ethical and practical problems as serial killers would.

 

What are your thoughts on who these people are and how we can identify and help them while protecting children?

 

It would be difficult to positively identify these people before they hurt someone, but steps should definitely be taken, and are. I think it is Meghan's law that dictates that sexual predators must inform the community they are currently living in that they are pedophiles.

 

Good points/questions, Coral.

[Coral Rhedd]

I am going to assume you are female (Coral Rhedd). So maybe I should try and explain it to you differently.

 

You see a male walking passed you. He is 6 foot tall looks like he works out has facial hair nicely cropped' date=' dressed to the nines (your thinkin he's 20ish) and check him out while he passes you. You turn to your friend and say "He's Hot!" your friend says, "That's my next door neighbor he is only 13.

 

I give up if this doesn't work for you. I don't know how to explain it in any more detail than I did before.

 

If someone else understands what I'm saying please put it in better words for Coral to understand.

 

Thanks.[/quote']

 

I'm thinking we not only have a gender gap here but an age gap as well. I am a middle aged woman but I just realized something: When I was 20, 16 year olds did not look as young as they do now.

 

However, 13 year old boys always looked skinny and wimpy -- even when I was 13.

 

I do remember when my daughter was 14 she was always liking 17 and 18 year old boys and I wouldn't let her go out with them. Actually, I wouldn't let her go out with anyone when she was 14. But guys sure liked her. I don't think you can realize with what fury and contempt I viewed college-aged guys in the mall who used to approach my daughter when I was with her and ask for her phone number. I know she did not look 18. She was even flat-chested. (Still is poor thing. )

 

So there must be some dynamic going on that I just don't understand. Even if men in their twenties, let's say, can be confused about how old girls are, why don't they just ask and err on the side of caution?

[Coral Rhedd]

I agree with this' date=' but it presents a whole slew of ethical and practical problems. The same should be done with serial killers, who clearly [i']are[/i] insane in most cases, but it hasn't, and isolating pedophiles would likely present similar ethical and practical problems as serial killers would.

 

It's definitely tricky. We can certainly identify early certain common behaviors in men (primarily men) who become serial killers: Bedwetting, abusing animals, setting fires. Fortunately, not all boys who display this behavior do become killers.

 

Due to laws that protect the privacy of juvenile sex offenders, it is difficult to know just how many of them continue their behavior, but counselors and psychologists I have talked to seem to think it is extremely high.

 

Thinking about this is a bit of a struggle for me. I tend to be a due process type of person, but I wonder how I would feel if we found a way to absolutely identify these offenders in their teens?