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Posted

So I'm not even sure if Jesus existed... but!

 

Was he an alien hybrid?
Guiding star=UFO
Raising from the dead at Easter=Aliens recovering Jesus' body from the tomb
Angels surrounded by halos=bright shining UFOs
Mt Sinai 10 commandments=receiving code of laws from aliens
Virgin Mary=Jesus was an alien hybrid, abducted and implanted with baby
Jesus' special talents=superior alien genes
Walking on water+producing bread from nothing=alien technology
Dying for our sins=chooses not to be rescued or seek retribution against humanity. Also sets an example of selflessness which has been followed for 2000 years.

Aliens are using us as an incubation chamber for beneficial mutations to create hybrid races with. It's far easier to let us deal with the harsh realities of nature and splice our DNA than build a new creature from scratch, since every gene has to be designed perfectly for a creature to work correctly.

Posted

We would be about as likely to hybridize with aliens as we would with a pine tree, in fact we share 3.8 billion years of evolution with pine trees but we share no evolution at all with aliens...

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