Existential Boredom

[TheGeckomancer]

Gees, since I was a kid the only thing I have wanted is to feel connected to people again. I don't. And have not been able to form one meaningful connection with anyone. Apparently this is a problem here in las vegas, when surveying random people on the street they found vegas had the lowest number of overall people people say they trusted. I almost certainly have chemical imbalances, because the standard reward system in my brain doesn't work, I don't even feel a sense of accomplishment when I achieve something I have worked on for a long time. It's just something else I finished and now I need to find something else to fill the time. But, I don't believe pills are the answer, they are AN answer, and maybe one I will try eventually. But I consider the brain a computer, and philosophy to be an operating system, I may not be wired normally but there should be a philosophy that allows me to function.

 

Also, to be clear, Stoicism did not help me quash my emotions. The world is a really fucked up horrible place, and if anyone steps back and really contemplates how bad it truly is the horror of it is enough to make me want to curl into a ball and sleep forever. Stoicism showed me that, people who view the world this way, and there are many, HAVE to quash their emotions.

Edited December 15, 2015 by TheGeckomancer

[CharonY]

 

I don't even feel a sense of accomplishment when I achieve something I have worked on for a long time.

 

I do not think this is that uncommon. I have the same, especially for very long projects. And I am certain that everyone at a given point will have the same feeling in their job (to various degrees).

 

What keeps me engaged is either the next step or what I can do once I figured something out. Certainly it is not necessarily an indication of a chemical imbalance, but rather of lack of interest. I also disagree that the world is a horrible place. Rather, the world has no interest in either of us and for this very reason I'd rather do stuff and carve my own niche rather than wait that somehow magically a spot for me appears. Sure, we will all die and it won't matter if we existed or not. Yet in the meantime there is plenty to do and only can decide how you want to fill up your time.

[cladking]

But I consider the brain a computer, and philosophy to be an operating system, I may not be wired normally but there should be a philosophy that allows me to function.

 

 

You're a great deal like I was when I was younger (so watch out).

 

All the great philosophers who have arrived at a meaning of human life have arrived at the exact same point; have fun and leave the world a better place. It's important that you do both and neglect neither. I work hard and I play hard. People say I do everything too hard.

 

Boredom is pernicious and needs to be controlled. It's gets easier to control it with age but it still requires effort. Get a hobby. Travel. It might be easier to make friends in a different place. Introspection might be good for you but nothing is good in excess.

 

Of course the brain is a computer but the operating system is language as expressed through belief, not philosophy. Certainly you can philosophize your beliefs and create a self fullfilling prophesy but the brain still has a soul where the computer is just hardware and a few cents worth of precious metal. You will grow and adapt and become what you believe and the computer will be tossed on the garbage heap in a few years as an obsolete and worthless occupier of space.

 

If you ever do get depressed don't forego medical attention. You obviously have a great deal you can contribute and the alternative, as you know, is a coward's long term solution to a short term problem that flies in the face of nature.

Yes. And read Camus.

[DevilSolution]

Out of curiosity, this thread is in the philosophical section, have you read much about philosophy and philosophers?

 

Each philosopher generally has contrasting outlook on life and will give you some insight into how great thinkers looked at the world around them from many different perspectives. Other than the basic fundamentals there's a great deal to be said for philosophers and we each have our own preferences but i'd strongly suggesting reading into it a little more. Other than your famous greek and german philosophers i have a personal tenancy towards bertrand russell and henri poincare.

[TheGeckomancer]

I actually do read a bit of philosophy. Won't call myself an expert of anything near it. But I fully understand and appreciate how valuable the great philosophical minds have been. I was actually hoping to be pointed in the direction of other philosophers, I have already read some Albert Camus and a TINY bit of poincare. But I will check out Bertrand Russell and Henri Poincare.

[Shelagh]

Why is it that busy people are never bored?

[DevilSolution]

[TheGeckomancer]

Because business is the opposite of boredom. But just saying that doesn't make life better, filling it with artificial busy work is not fulfilling or boredom stifling. The key is to find meaning, which is difficult when you don't care about anything. Like I said in my opening post. Even pain is preferable to boredom. But it's also not a simple choice of cutting myself to not be bored. I still control all the circumstances. Including if I were to just assign myself busy work.

[Phi for All]

I still control all the circumstances.

 

Except this one:

 

The key is to find meaning, which is difficult when you don't care about anything.

 

But I suppose consistently NOT caring about anything is a type of control. Sort of like vowing never to use your thumbs for anything. Or refusing to ever cooperate with another human to achieve a goal. Or taking a vow of silence.

[TheGeckomancer]

You are correct. Except that one. Far as I have been able to, I cannot seem to assign meaning to things.

 

I did not take a vow to not care about things. In fact, my life has been a struggle to find things to care about. I started off young with a lot of them. And lost them over time, until I didn't have any left. Gaining NEW ones is extremely difficult it seems.

[Shelagh]

Set yourself goals. The less we do, the less we want to do. That goes for everyone, not just you. You are posting on a science forum, so you do have an interest. Make something that requires skill and invention, but costs little to do. Find someone who doesn't share your skill but would love to be able to make whatever it is you produce, and then teach them how to make one for themselves. Time is the most important thing you can give anyone. You don't need to be rewarded; you can pay it forward by asking those you helped to give as much of their time to others as you gave to them.

[TheGeckomancer]

And that is a part of the problem. I am not unproductive. I maintain a job, one for which I can be promoted almost anytime I want, but choose not to. I am a ranked magic the gathering player, I enter and sometimes win tournaments. A longtime goal of mine was earning my A+ Net+ certifications did that. Got recognized for a scholarship program was the top pick of several thousand candidates, and aced those classes. I get no sense of accomplishment or satisfaction from any of it. It's just stuff I do to not be doing nothing.

[hoola]

....why is there all this suffering that seems a part of daily life in human societies? What, if any cause could be attributed to such an impossible question...? I conjecture that it is because of a fundamental flaw in the structural basis of this universe. In this thought experiment, I propose that everything is math, or a component within it, and this "error" is an inescapable component of functional reality, even of our brain's thought process.. I propose that an error of calculation occurred somewhere in the chain of informational evolution from the void to the eventual culmination of formal mathematics as it existed at the moment of our big bang. This "distorted output" of that final equation set affected the CP symmetry, giving the leftover matter we are made of. My model proposes a finite number of extant universes, each having a unique "error signature" that allows for the CP asymmetry along with other possible differences. If QM has a built in error correction code as described by S. Gates, that seems to lend some support to the model. After all, why is it there and what is it constantly correcting? The model also proposes that some gamma ray bursters are caused by a nascent universe's big bang described without an error signature that includes the CP symmetry disparity ... quickly ending in fading gamma rays... ----(I am fixing myself, therefore I exist)---

[DevilSolution]

A+ and N+ are a pisser, its when you get to uni and get negative marks for wrong answers on multiple questions you'll realize what's hard.

[CharonY]

All things considered, exams are trivial. After all, these are relatively short-term efforts. Building a sustainable life and being able to care for people other than yourself, much less so.

[dimreepr]

And that is a part of the problem. I am not unproductive. I maintain a job, one for which I can be promoted almost anytime I want, but choose not to. I am a ranked magic the gathering player, I enter and sometimes win tournaments. A longtime goal of mine was earning my A+ Net+ certifications did that. Got recognized for a scholarship program was the top pick of several thousand candidates, and aced those classes. I get no sense of accomplishment or satisfaction from any of it. It's just stuff I do to not be doing nothing.

 

There's nothing noble about being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self - Ernest Hemingway.

 

You may want to try a little humility and/or meditation, being bored is an excellent opportunity.

Edited December 18, 2015 by dimreepr

[Ophiolite]

I am not unproductive.

Very few people are, so its not much of an achievement. Perhaps you should try to up your output by an order of magnitude.

 

 

I maintain a job, one for which I can be promoted almost anytime I want, but choose not to.

I have heard a lot of people make that excuse.

 

I am a ranked magic the gathering player, I enter and sometimes win tournaments.

Don't worry, you are using a pseudonym. No one need ever know.

 

A longtime goal of mine was earning my A+ Net+ certifications did that.

See earlier comments by other members.

 

Got recognized for a scholarship program was the top pick of several thousand candidates, and aced those classes. I get no sense of accomplishment or satisfaction from any of it.

Perhaps you should try something that you find difficult. Planned mediocrity is a sensible life style if you get satisfaction from it, but apparently that doesn't work for you.

[TheGeckomancer]

 

There's nothing noble about being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self - Ernest Hemingway.

 

You may want to try a little humility and/or meditation, being bored is an excellent opportunity.

 

 

The point of that post wasn't to go Oh look how great I am. Everyone keeps telling me on here my accomplishments suck. Not all of them. But it wasn't more meaningful. This is why i don't do a LOT of things. I have no real interest in comparing myself to other people. I do strive to be a better person than I was all the time. Hence why I am on here trying to fix the things I KNOW can be better..... The problem with meditation is which form? I used to do zen meditation, for hours, trying to focus on clearing my head. It's refreshing but nothing changes. I DO do daily meditation, where I spend a couple hours just thinking on myself, my life, and my choices. But that doesn't seem to be enough to get me to a happier point.

 

 

Very few people are, so its not much of an achievement. Perhaps you should try to up your output by an order of magnitude.

 

 

I have heard a lot of people make that excuse.

 

Don't worry, you are using a pseudonym. No one need ever know.

 

See earlier comments by other members.

 

Perhaps you should try something that you find difficult. Planned mediocrity is a sensible life style if you get satisfaction from it, but apparently that doesn't work for you.

 

First point. My job has TRIED to promote me 4 times. The site director came to me personally and asked why I haven't applied for any positions. I don't like how supervisors get treated where I work. The pay and benefits are nice but not for 80 hours a week salaried. It's not literally that but it's close.

 

Second Point. Why in the hell would I lie about sometimes winning local magic tournaments? Is that a point of extreme pride? Did I blink somewhere and suddenly Magic The Gathering is in the same category as cross country running or multiple time muay thai champion? I frankly think I have bigger problems than being bored if my aspiration is to convince someone I have never met before that I play a game no one cares about and I am very slightly above mediocre at it.

 

Third Point. Acknowledged.

 

4th. I don't really find things difficult. I know that is a crazy ego statement but I don't mind you it's not like I have picked a topic and mastered it yet, hence the point of this topic, general lack of interest and boredom. There are a TON of things I don't enjoy. Even those are usually not difficult for me. The only things that are challenging are physical things, such as long distance running, and I have health issues restricting me from doing certain types of exercises. Running being a big one.

 

And before anyone says it. Don't think it hasn't occurred to me that my lack of interest my be some mechanism to prevent failure. Easier to not try than to fail. I get that. But that doesn't mean it has a simple solution. Am I supposed to just PICK something I CURRENTLY have no interest in and spend years of time trying to hone myself at it only to find that I either genuinely don't like the thing I have done that with or that I am still the same afterwards.

 

I may not be a programmer, and I may not have high certifications. But my tech skills are very much beyond my certifications. I actively spent years as a hobby learning technology. It sort of interested me, but mainly I knew I had a knack for it and figured I might be able to easily be successful in that field. It's sort of worked. But now I am burnt out completely and I have only been doing it a few years. I don't even like owning a phone, which I intentionally got with no data service so people can't MMS or group message me.

 

Also Ophiolite. This whole topic, has been a question with info about me. Your response was mostly just veiled insults. Is there a reason for this? Do you somehow feel threatened by me or this post? I don't get it.

Edited December 19, 2015 by TheGeckomancer

[Shelagh]

I think your boredom may be linked to physical inactivity. Aerobic exercises produce endorphins in the brain that give a sense of well-being. Jogging on hard surfaces is wearing on leg joints: hips, knees, ankles. Swimming and cycling take the load off the lower limbs and are good ways to exercise.

 

There are lots of books to help you find the right kind of exercise to suit your physical condition. Tim Peake, the British astronaut who has just arrived at the International Space Station, will be exercising two hours a day to maintain muscle mass and bone density, as well as the benefits to his cardio-vascular system and mental well-being. You might find inspiration from following his progress in space during the next six months!

[Ophiolite]

Also Ophiolite. This whole topic, has been a question with info about me. Your response was mostly just veiled insults. Is there a reason for this? Do you somehow feel threatened by me or this post? I don't get it.

My apologies. I had no intention of offering veiled insults. They were meant to be more obvious than that.

 

You have rejected all the positive and thoughtful suggestions made by several members, so I opted for a different approach, calling you out on your self-indulgent, narcissistic approach to life. The hope was this might produce a sufficient shock to alter your perspective just enough to provide a path to the solution to your problem. The only obvious downside would be a potential staff admonition for ad hominems.

 

It didn't work, but it I doubt it made your situation any worse.

 

Why in the hell would I lie about sometimes winning local magic tournaments?

This is of tertiary relevance, but for clarification purposes, I was not accusing you of lying. I was simply amused - apologies to all gamers - at the importance you seemed to attach to winning such tournaments.

[dimreepr]

 

 

The point of that post wasn't to go Oh look how great I am.

 

 

Really? Ok

 

Everyone keeps telling me on here my accomplishments suck.

 

 

 

Do they?

 

I do strive to be a better person than I was all the time. Hence why I am on here trying to fix the things.

 

 

 

And yet you reject any and all suggestions.

 

 

The problem with meditation is which form?

 

 

 

That’s not a problem with meditation (auto-rejection again) they all ‘work’, if your problem is being bored for an hour or two and “it’s refreshing”.

[TheGeckomancer]

Offering advice on how you view the world is not opinions that I can take and DO SOMETHING WITH. They are things you have to think about and incorporate. And they have to be consistent with who you are and the things you have learned. It's beyond idiotic to think I am insulting anyone by not immediately embracing a way of looking at the world that entirely different from my own. Stop and think for a damn minute.

 

My apologies. I had no intention of offering veiled insults. They were meant to be more obvious than that.

 

You have rejected all the positive and thoughtful suggestions made by several members, so I opted for a different approach, calling you out on your self-indulgent, narcissistic approach to life. The hope was this might produce a sufficient shock to alter your perspective just enough to provide a path to the solution to your problem. The only obvious downside would be a potential staff admonition for ad hominems.

 

It didn't work, but it I doubt it made your situation any worse.

 

This is of tertiary relevance, but for clarification purposes, I was not accusing you of lying. I was simply amused - apologies to all gamers - at the importance you seemed to attach to winning such tournaments.

 

 

I am not posting what I do here to gain your acceptance. I don't care if you think my hobbies are awesome or completely inane. The fact that you think your opinion even matters on that topic is amazing. STFU and learn your place. I come here from a position of vulnerability and ask for advice, you use it as an opportunity to insult me because I don't share your world view. And I am the one that needs to learn....Seriously.... You don't understand anything if you think I can just take a sequence of words, plug them in and be a different person. It takes time and introspection and it has to resonate with your experiences.

Edited December 19, 2015 by TheGeckomancer

[Phi for All]

STFU and learn your place.

 

Hey, I've reported this because it's waaaay out of bounds here. If I wasn't involved in this thread, I'd boot you till the first of the year. This is just a hateful thing to say to anyone, and it was completely unwarranted as well. Civility is rule #1 here.

 

You definitely have a chip on your shoulder. You may want to think about finding another site that will let you say whatever you feel like saying. I don't care how bored you are.

[DevilSolution]

Dont ban him yet, i like it when there's less intelligent people around, i stand out less then.

 

"I'll open a thread about how bored i am and how intelligent i am and then argue with any suggestions"

 

You need a self help book.

 

What? did you want one of us to give you a purpose in life? or did you want us all to talk about the void?

[TheGeckomancer]

 

Hey, I've reported this because it's waaaay out of bounds here. If I wasn't involved in this thread, I'd boot you till the first of the year. This is just a hateful thing to say to anyone, and it was completely unwarranted as well. Civility is rule #1 here.

 

You definitely have a chip on your shoulder. You may want to think about finding another site that will let you say whatever you feel like saying. I don't care how bored you are.

 

 

So I am out of line because I don't couch my insults in nice words? That's honestly more insulting. His words should not be the slightest BIT more appropriate than mine. I just don't like dancing with people with words. If he wants to insult me he can just say it. Just as I can. Ban me if you want but ban him to or be a hypocrite. To put this in perspective. I posted a vulnerable thread, about a problem I am dealing with. And people have offered good information (but assume that a couple of words instantly change something which is wrong), and then been insulted for literally no reason. And that is acceptable but not my response. If that really is the tone of this forum I certainly don't belong here. Fairness and equality are things that resonate a LOT more strongly with me than civility. Unless it IS his place to insult me for hobbies and opinions? Because last I checked it's not anyone's place. What I said was strongly worded, but entirely accurate. And in fact, even if this conversation ends here, and you don't ban me, if he is not reprimanded for that comment it's the same as endorsing his right to judge and insult other people.

 

 

 

Dont ban him yet, i like it when there's less intelligent people around, i stand out less then.

"I'll open a thread about how bored i am and how intelligent i am and then argue with any suggestions"

You need a self help book.

What? did you want one of us to give you a purpose in life? or did you want us all to talk about the void?

 

 

I never said I was more intelligent than anyone. In fact I still don't know how to multiquote easily on this forum. I know a lot of people WAY more intelligent than myself. People who intimidate me. In fact I would say a lot of people on this forum are way smarter than me, especially at individual fields. Going further DevilSolution, I kind of scoped out a lot of your posts when I initially joined, you are someone I have very high respect for the intelligence of. And Phi For All, much as he seems to dislike me. I may be wired well for academics but that is not a sign of intelligence. If I were more intelligent than other people than finding how to be happy would be easier. People do it all the time. To me the highest sign of intelligence is knowing how to have the life you want. Which I don't. By my own standards I am very dumb. And at some point. I may end up at the same spot you are at mentally, maybe. But I almost certainly won't get there through the same path. I am not arguing with people by saying there view doesn't resonate with me. I am sorry I can't give the instant gratification of saying that 2 sentences I read online instantly changed my whole world view. I would bet the phrases I needed to hear have been said dozens of times, but until I am mentally there it won't click.

Edited December 20, 2015 by TheGeckomancer