The Official JOKES SECTION :)

[Moontanman]

2 hours ago, iNow said:

I have a tshirt that says that!

Where did you get it? 

[Gabriel Wickley]

Disclaimer: Used in a joke

The converse of this: any language spoken in a region inhabited by marsupials is a Marsupic language.

Edited January 11, 2023 by Gabriel Wickley
Forgot to include this in the media

[iNow]

4 hours ago, Moontanman said:

Where did you get it? 

Good question. Been a while. Not this site, used one of the countless others like bustedtees, but same outcome:

https://www.redbubble.com/shop/63+earths+can+fit+inside+uranus+64+if+you+relax

[Sensei]

[TheVat]

I'm impressed whenever another Uranus joke can be squeezed out.

It's also interesting that Uranus is a gas giant.

14 hours ago, Gabriel Wickley said:

Disclaimer: Used in a joke

The converse of this: any language spoken in a region inhabited by marsupials is a Marsupic language.

I'm sorry, I don't get the joke.  

[Phi for All]

24 minutes ago, TheVat said:

I'm sorry, I don't get the joke.  

It's a marginal pun to begin with (Messapic is an extinct language, and the made-up "Marsupic" isn't even that close), made almost incomprehensible by poor formatting and extraneous grammar distractions (the converse?! Dislcaimer?!), along with a redundant, sideways photo of the whole thing written by hand. It must be one of those scratch your head, paleo-Balkanic language jokes rather than the laughy kind.

[iNow]

[Moontanman]

[Moontanman]

[Moontanman]

[iNow]

[Moontanman]

What do you call a snake that is 3.14 meters long? 

[StringJunky]

2 minutes ago, Moontanman said:

What do you call a snake that is 3.14 meters long? 

Pi'd.

[Moontanman]

1 hour ago, StringJunky said:

Pi'd.

I hadn't thought of that answer, i was going for Pithyon. 

[TheVat]

Culture war over talking candies  and Tucker Carlson mourns the loss of sexually alluring candies....

https://www.vice.com/en/article/m7gzqa/mms-says-its-spokescandies-are-retiring-amid-conservative-culture-war

[TheVat]

12 hours ago, Moontanman said:

What do you call a snake that is 3.14 meters long? 

A decipede.  (it's a ten-footer)

[Sensei]

The Chinese and Japanese could not conquer the world - they spend too much time on paperwork:

 

 

 

[Lorentz Jr]

With gratitude and apologies to my dear departed father (EE in the Cold War):

 

If you ask a mathematician, "What is two times two?",
the mathematician will tell you, "Two times two is exactly four."

 

If you ask a physicist, "What is two times two?",
the physicist will tell you, "Two times two is precisely four point zero."

 

If you ask an engineer, "What is two times two?", the engineer will look at you for a moment and then say, "Aah, I dunno, lemme google it. Where's my phone? Somebody find my phone!"

 

If you asked the engineer's grandfather seventy years ago, "What is two times two?", the engineer's grandfather would pull his slide rule out of his pocket, fiddle with it for a moment, and then say, "Aah, about three point nine six."

Edited January 30, 2023 by Lorentz Jr

[studiot]

21 minutes ago, Lorentz Jr said:

If you ask a mathematician, "What is two times two?",

+1

[sethoflagos]

[Sensei]

 

 

Edited February 9, 2023 by Sensei

[John Cuthber]

That video shows at least 4 apes with guns.
Just to clarify things.
Guns were invented by apes and are almost exclusively used by apes.

I'm more worried about people who refuse to believe that people are apes than I am about a chimp with an AK.

 

Edited February 9, 2023 by John Cuthber

[Moontanman]

So planet of the apes is coming?!

[TheVat]

3 hours ago, John Cuthber said:

That video shows at least 4 apes with guns.

And here we were just discussing, over in political humor, what lines can be crossed in joking.  I'm pretty sure you didn't intend the mindbendingly racist aspect of referring to black people as apes.  In the United States, this particular slur has a long and terrible history, and a person of color visiting this thread (or anyone, really) might well decide this forum is not worth their time.  I won't DV you, but respectfully request you be aware of why this post is offensive.

[John Cuthber]

3 hours ago, John Cuthber said:

That video shows at least 4 apes with guns.

Would whoever marked that down like to explain why?
In particular, do they realise that people are apes?