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Posted

Penis Study.

 

The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason that the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex. After the US published the study, the French decided to do their own study. After $250,000 and three years of research, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the woman more pleasure during sex. Canadians, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After two weeks and a cost of around $75.46, and two cases of beer, they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting himself in the forehead.....

 

yeah Canada for keeping it real...

Posted (edited)

Have a happy Friday. It's about 13 mins. Jump into the middle if you don't want to watch it all.

 

Edited by EdEarl
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

These gun laws are getting ridiculous. The last time I went to the sporting goods store and was ready to pay for my purchase of ammo the clerk told me "Strip down facing me".

Well, I did just as she instructed. As the screeching was dieing down i realized that she was talking about my credit card.

 

Is it just me or do they need to be more clear with those instructions?

I guess it hardly matters now. I was told I have to conduct my shopping elsewhere in the future.

Posted

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LEARNING TO CUSS A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss". The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, "When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass". The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios". WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!" She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know", he blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios"..

Posted

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom's the best sex in town!"

 

Everyone expects a fight, but the guy ignores him, so the drunk wanders off and bellies up to the bar at the far end. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back,

 

points at the same guy, and says, "I just did your mom, and it was sw-e-et!"

 

Again the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk goes back to the far end of the bar. Ten minutes later, he comes back and announces, "Your mom liked it!"

 

Finally the guy interrupts. "Go home, Dad, you're drunk!"......

Posted (edited)

"Don't swat any flies or you'll be a hot dog man"?

 

"Can I have a twelve inch with a side of yang?"

 

"Don't eat that - that's my brother from a past life"?

Edited by Tridimity
Posted

+1

 

Not sure relate or any other marriage guidance counselling service would approve of the choice of the division sign to represent the counsellor

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