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Posted (edited)

There's this girl in my class I like, and I tried to befriend her, but she wasn't interested. Maybe I should consider my innate evolutionary circumstances as an undesirable a blessing. Relationships seem more bad than good. I'm not so much upset for not having the love and companionship as I am for just having no one interested in me. I'm not really interested in the strict, dogmatic, "happily ever after" companionship bullshit. I would just like to have some girls WANT to be with me. I'd obviously like to bed a few of them. But mostly I'd like to know what its like to be like the other guys, to have girls flirt with me, to show interest in me. I've never met another guy in my life who had my problems. Every guy I've ever met (without exception) got attention from at least some girls. It has never and will never happen for me. I'm convinced this is an absolute.

Edited by Tampitump
Posted (edited)

You picked a girl that didn't reciprocate your interest; that happens to everybody.

Which has been every single girl I've come across in my life. Its not just one point of data I'm judging the whole thing on. Its hundreds of independent, mutually-confirming points of data. The evidence is unassailable from my perspective.

 

Plus, its not just the reaction from girls I'm judging by, its everyone. Its known and agreed that I'm ugly and weird. I use the word "freak" because I think it best describes and portrays the essence of what I look like and what my whole person is like. Its just known from the get go that I'm undesirable and unworthy of the time of day. That's how its always been.

Edited by Tampitump
Posted

Which has been every single girl I've come across in my life. Its not just one point of data. Its hundreds of independent, mutually-confirming points of data. The evidence is unassailable from my perspective.

Only you can decide to make your self-fulfilling prophecy not be realised.

Posted (edited)

Only you can decide to make your self-fulfilling prophecy not be realised.

Its not a SFP. My intent from the beginning was not to see to it that people did not like me, then whine about it. This is a reaction to how my life has been since it began. I don't think you're granting my looks enough concession. I'd post a pic of myself for all to see if this weren't the internet.

 

And no, its apparently not within my powers to make this all better. I've tried feeling comfortable in my own skin, I've tried being positive and being myself, I've tried all of the bullshit advice that uninvested people like you so easily throw my way. I've fucking tried it. But you'll never believe that. To you, it's all got to do with my attitude and no one could ever possibly dislike someone for their atrocious looks. This is what pisses me off about people who are not affected by poor genes. If only you could fucking try it for a day.

Edited by Tampitump
Posted

And here I thought you'd re-started this old thread to tell us you had a girlfriend, and had decided to quit talking on-line to us losers !

Posted

Plus, its not just the reaction from girls I'm judging by, its everyone.

Whoa...Are you saying you've been rejected by 3.5B+ females already? Holy monkey testicles, batman... That's incredible, dude!!

 

You've been trying WAY harder than I've been giving you credit for if you've included EVERYONE in your population sample already.

 

We're all obviously a bunch of idiots here. Please, I implore you...nay, I beg you!...please accept my sincerest apologies for downplaying the tremendous effort you've put forward in trying to nurture a healthy relationship and for mostly assuming you were just acting like a whiny little bitch this whole time. Mea culpa.

Posted (edited)

Whoa...Are you saying you've been rejected by 3.5B+ females already? Holy monkey testicles, batman... That's incredible, dude!!

.

That's not actually what I meant by that. I meant not just women, but men and women alike (i.e. everyone I meet). They seem to have the same opinion of me. No one really likes me. I'm sure you guys have a clear picture by now as to why that is.

 

I know I seem like a sad little prick and a total asshole. I'm sorry. Perhaps my problems are due more to a shitty personality. The truth is I really just hate life, I hate myself, and every night I wish I could just go to sleep and never fucking wake up. Sleep is the only time I'm really happy. Again, I'm not suicidal. Just explaining my everyday feelings. I'm okay.

Edited by Tampitump
Posted

You really should explore getting some help dealing with these feelings. Nobody discounts the challenges you face. Most of us just see better ways of processing and managing them.

Posted

And just to clarify, this conclusion:

 

Again, I'm not suicidal. Just explaining my everyday feelings. I'm okay.

Is in no way, shape, form, or universe either valid or correct given this genuine admission:

The truth is I really just hate life, I hate myself, and every night I wish I could just go to sleep and never fucking wake up. Sleep is the only time I'm really happy.

Posted

And just to clarify, this conclusion:

 

 

Is in no way, shape, form, or universe either valid or correct given this genuine admission:

 

this is only true if I have actual intentions of harming myself, and I don't.
Posted

 

 

So why post it?

Because iNow got me wrong. Its important, when evaluating my motives, to understand the pain caused by my depression. That's why.
Posted

Because iNow got me wrong. Its important, when evaluating my motives, to understand the pain caused by my depression. That's why.

 

 

You're so, I want to say narcissistic but I've a feeling it's narcissistic by proxy, childish or maybe you've just read "A catcher in the rye".

Posted

 

 

You're so, I want to say narcissistic but I've a feeling it's narcissistic by proxy, childish or maybe you've just read "A catcher in the rye".

Nah, not really man.
Posted

 

 

On reflection, please don't read it...

I care deeply about my loved ones, and about other people. I'm not a narcissist. You're wrong.
Posted (edited)

 

 

If you say so... ;)

alright, thanks man. Appreciate it.

Not sure why it's unacceptable to vent. You get labeled a narcissist if you do.

Edited by Tampitump
Posted

 

 

It's not, just be honest about it...

Ok, well give me a few hours to think this one over. I'll have to spend some time figuring out where I've been dishonest. Its not coming to me right away.

 

I guess to you, me being honest would be saying that I really have no depression, that I'm just a narcissist and a whiner.

Posted

Ok, well give me a few hours to think this one over. I'll have to spend some time figuring out where I've been dishonest. Its not coming to me right away.

 

I guess to you, me being honest would be saying that I really have no depression, that I'm just a narcissist and a whiner.

 

 

I don't know, you tell me...

Posted

 

 

I don't know, you tell me...

I have severe MDD probably. Can't be sure because I've never been diagnosed.

 

I'm not sure what you mean by "be honest". I've said entirely what I mean with no dishonest intentions at all this whole time.

Posted (edited)

I'm not sure what you mean by "be honest". I've said entirely what I mean with no dishonest intentions at all this whole time.

 

 

I mean be honest with yourself, I certainly don't care either-way.

Edited by dimreepr
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