One for all, and all for none

[Function]

Hello

 

With this thread, I'm looking to find a specific psychological term for a certain type of behaviour or personality. I'm not convinced that it's a genuine pathological condition, but it sure differs from what is generally considered as functional, 'normal' (much as I hate that word) behaviour.

 

I've got the chance to work with a quite brilliant person. This person has done some amazing fundamental research in human anatomy. However, he's not the type of guy you'd like to work with. At least, not the type of guy I liked working with, nor a lot of people liked working with, apparently.

Daily, he'd tell some anecdotes about himself and his life.

 

Basically, almost every anecdote came down to this 1 conclusion - at least, that's how I interpreted it, much as sorry as I am for not giving more objective 'data':

 

"I am brilliant, and there might be others that have the potential of being brilliant, but they're not doing it right. Everyone who I worked with has abandoned me and I'm all alone in my own superior world, and I don't care because I know I am brilliant, I can perform amazing groundbreaking research. No one I ever met has met the requirements of the research I'm doing, and people who do are not interested in it because it doesn't give them enough publications. But that's not me. I'm not the type of guy doing stuff to make lots of publications, no... When I publish, I make sure it's a perfect publication [and some other stuff], and no one has ever righteously corrected anything out of any publication of mine [again some other stuff], and [since he's a peer reviewer of some journals] I always see the same sh*t people come up with, or they make wrong conclusions, or what they say can be interpreted ambiguously [...] in their publications."

 

About that last one: I gave him an article I fully understood, in terms of his research, for a literature review, and he marked some sentences of which the purpose, the meaning could be easily interpreted. However, he made a problem of every small word in that sentence, making long reasonings on why it might be interpreted incorrectly, ergo making the article quite useless. In his eyes. I felt like: dude, act normal, I'll ask anyone in this building what that sentence means and they'll give you the explanation you want, but you really do have to make a problem out of it, don't you. Because that's what you like. Problems. And dealing with them. Occasionally with success. But hey, it's your research. I serve to please!

 

Other students performing dissections in the dissecting room he oversaw during a certain time have let me know that, even for quite some hours, they were bothered by his preaches about what he already has accomplished, and his endless knowledge on a specific domain in human anatomy, and all his life stories. When I first met him, asking if I could help in his research, he of course asked me some questions, whereafter he told me:

 

"You know, I wouldn't mind reject just another student like you ... There's plenty of them yearning for participation in my research ..."

Truth be told: I haven't witnessed any other candidate for his research project.

 

He gave me the feeling of dealing with a massive god complex and what I like to call a syndrome of one for all, and all for none: he's done everything he could for the world, and it's not giving him anything in return, the poor guy.

 

I'm biased in that way that he mocked other research I was working on, he declared his own research and the publication it would lead to as "Harvard level", that I could enter whatever university worldwide with my name on that publication, to be honest, I felt quite manipulated in continuing working with him. However, he made me choose between his research and the other research I was going to work on (and still am right now, so guess what happened). I didn't feel the need to continue working with a genuinly brilliant academic with an enormous god complex such as he had. And he mocked me for that, but my personal problems with him aside.

 

When it comes to empathy and social interactions:

During a break from work with him, to go and eat (those breaks usually lasted for 2 hours since he drove home and ate and then drove back), I met a good friend of mine I hadn't seen for quite a time. During those breaks, the man expected from me to do some literature research. Admitted, I should have, but I didn't, since I talked a lot with that friend of mine. The conversation I had with the man afterwards:

"So ... Have you got anything new?"

- "Erm well, truth be told, I don't ... You see, I encountered this friend I haven't seen for a long time and-"

- "Oh ... You wasted your time on social interaction ..."

And this is something he genuinly meant: he is convinced that social interaction is a waste of time and mind, something a professor of mine, who introduced me to him for the research, warned me for: "He can be a bit ... awkward in social interaction, but he's brilliant"

 

Is there, in psychology or psychiatry, a certain term for the kind of behaviour he expresses? The "one for all and all for none" syndrome, the "me against the world" phenomenon? From what you've read, do you think his type of behaviour is somewhat disturbed? It surely is problematic, since it undermines his professional relationships (and although I'm not going to outspeak myself on that indisputably, perhaps even personal relationships). It's a kind of behaviour/personality trait that I have witnessed on these forums too, from time to time (exceptionally): the idea of being brilliant (while basically, it doesn't matter if you're right or wrong, it's the behaviour that's being expressed that I'm focussing on here), all the rest being wrong and not having anyone listening to you, being alone, not getting any gratitude from what you're doing (which is a misunderstanding they have), ...

 

In conclusion, actually, he made me feel sorry for him. Only thing I could think of when I left his research, and him along with it was, poor bastard, you have no idea what you're missing (since I'm convinced that he hasn't got any love that every human being deserves, for a very long time), and I genuinly feel sorry for you and the life and situation you've landed in, but I don't know if that's your fault or not. Last thing I thought: I must make sure not to end like this. Believe me, I feel horrible when thinking such things. In my eyes, what's left of him is a pauper, a miser.

 

Makes me think a bit of histrionic personality disorder, however, it shows some differences (based on Wikipedia):

• Provocative: yes
• Relationships more intimate than they actually are: no, perhaps even a bit restrained and mistrusting
• Attention-seeking: perhaps, but not in a very open and exclamative way, rather attention-wanting
• Influenced easily by others: no, again, rather mistrusting
• Speech wants to impress: yes
• Speech lacks detail: absolutely not, rather more detailed than wanted by conversation partners, often appearing as yammering
• Emotional lability and shallowness: perhaps
• Make-up: he did have an extravagant look, but not to say that he put much effort in it.
• Exaggerated emotions: perhaps, emotions of loneliness and abandonment, that is

Feel free to tell me if you believe there's something psychologically wrong with me, too

 

Thanks

 

Function

Edited September 4, 2016 by Function

[DrmDoc]

Perhaps he's overcompensating for something...perhaps his own sense of inferiority--it's called a Superiority Complex.

[Rasher Null]

If he's brilliant at everything he should be a brilliant educator. So tell him you want to learn from him (genuinely) , but "it takes to two tango" and if he wants to be a great educator then he cannot blame everyone else all the time if he is not imparting his knowledge very successfully.

[Sirona]

I would be inclined to think that he has Asperger's Syndrome because what you describe is consistent with what I have experienced working with Aspies. Unfortunately, your negative perception is common and Asperger's is often misdiagnosed as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). In my experience with high functioning Autism Spectrum children, they often display qualities similar to NPD such as limited display of empathy, lack of or poor self-awareness, inability or difficulty in reciprocating emotions, objectifying other people, vanity/pride and difficulty in forming connections; these traits are also consistent with NPD. I have taught a student in maths who had ASD and he would refuse to work in class and when I sought clarification from him, he would reply with 'I know everything and you can't teach me anything that I don't already know; this class is boring because I am smarter than everyone.'

 

It can be difficult dealing with someone who can even at times be condescending, or at the very least, draining to listen to with their constant self-praise, however, it is important to understand that they only seem unsympathetic and/or conceited because they lack the appropriate social reactions to others emotions, not because they don't have empathy. It is important that you avoid creating a stressful environment because they can become overwhelmed which can result in them appearing selfish and/or uncaring, however, this is only because they become withdrawn.

The fact that he drives home for two hours to have lunch also is a signal that he has more than a 'superiority complex' as Doc suggested; unusual eating habits are also consistent with ASD and they can be pedantic about food. Perhaps he goes home to eat because he only eats something very specific which he cannot prepare or eat at work.

As I mentioned earlier, I cannot be certain given the brief information that was provided, but it would not be unlikely that he has ASD given his personal habits and behaviour.

[Function]

Hmm yes, now that you mention it, I don't understand how Asperger's didn't come up in my mind earlier ...

 

Sidenote: I know you didn't mean to, but I find "Aspies" quite an offending term. Just be careful using pars pro totos in people with mental/psychological disorders.

 

"Because they lack the appropriate social reactions to others emotions, not because they don't have empathy."

So you insinuate that they do have a good sense for correct interpretation of others' emotions and feelings, but lack the ability to express the acknowledgement of that perception? I always thought they were simply not good in perceiving and interpreting, let alone take into account others' emotions, ergo, lack of empathy.

 

The domain of mental disorders (I don't like this term either, but that's just my fault) is quite fascinating, though difficult to handle, understand, and put into practise.

[Sirona]

Hmm yes, now that you mention it, I don't understand how Asperger's didn't come up in my mind earlier ...

 

Sidenote: I know you didn't mean to, but I find "Aspies" quite an offending term. Just be careful using pars pro totos in people with mental/psychological disorders.

 

"Because they lack the appropriate social reactions to others emotions, not because they don't have empathy."

So you insinuate that they do have a good sense for correct interpretation of others' emotions and feelings, but lack the ability to express the acknowledgement of that perception? I always thought they were simply not good in perceiving and interpreting, let alone take into account others' emotions, ergo, lack of empathy.

 

The domain of mental disorders (I don't like this term either, but that's just my fault) is quite fascinating, though difficult to handle, understand, and put into practise.

It's not surprising and being a spectrum disorder, it can be difficult to diagnose, especially if it's mild.

 

I'm sorry that you're offended by the term because that was not my intent; I don't believe the term is derogatory or offensive and if used in the right context with the appropriate tone it can be affectionate. Since it's easy to misinterpret tone and intent through text, I can appreciate your sentiment and will avoid using the term online.

Edited November 1, 2016 by Sirona

[StringJunky]

 

 

The domain of mental disorders (I don't like this term either, but that's just my fault) is quite fascinating, though difficult to handle, understand, and put into practise.

Why? A mental disorder is that behaviour which is detrimental to a person with the disorder or detrimental to those around them.

[Function]

Why? A mental disorder is that behaviour which is detrimental to a person with the disorder or detrimental to those around them.

 

Hmm ... Is it per se detrimental? Idk, if it isn't, I find "disorder" seemingly labeling, as in: we tell you what is normal and everything that is not conform these norms, is part of a disorder. WHich basically is the case, but ah well .. I find it difficult to explain my problem with the term "mental disorder" ... Anyone who can understand me in my reasoning? I'd rather describe it as "aberrations of common behaviour patterns", without having to label "common behaviour patterns" as "normal" or anything that deviates from that as "abnormal" or "disorder"

[StringJunky]

 

Hmm ... Is it per se detrimental? Idk, if it isn't, I find "disorder" seemingly labeling, as in: we tell you what is normal and everything that is not conform these norms, is part of a disorder. WHich basically is the case, but ah well .. I find it difficult to explain my problem with the term "mental disorder" ... Anyone who can understand me in my reasoning? I'd rather describe it as "aberrations of common behaviour patterns", without having to label "common behaviour patterns" as "normal" or anything that deviates from that as "abnormal" or "disorder"

I thought I'd deleted that comment because I couldn't be bothered to pick over it... but hey... it's there now. I think it's your age (without being patronising) that makes you think like you currently do; your sense of idealism is very apparent...It'll pass. There is a trend towards bending over backwards not to offend any group, no matter how tenuous.

 

To the point: if a person can't function properly or negatively impedes those around them, their behaviour is not commensurate with group or personal harmony i.e. their functioning is disordered

Edited November 1, 2016 by StringJunky